


Whenever You're Ready, Can We Surrender?

by Victory4



Category: SKAM (TV), SKAM (TV) RPF
Genre: Acting, Anal Sex, Boners, Confusion, Crying, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hand Jobs, Henjei, Hickeys, Im obsessed, Light Angst, Longing, M/M, Masturbation, Oral Sex, Rimming, Season 3, Slight Panic Attacks, Smut, but it'll be fine, canon but in my own AU, different POVs, emotional attacks, i dont know how to do these bloody tags, maybe some angst?, natural connection, okay i decided to do some angst, raw emotions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2018-11-06 06:42:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 62,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11030742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Victory4/pseuds/Victory4
Summary: "I found him Julie. I found Isak's love.I found my Even."or the thoughts, feelings and interactions of Tarjei and Henrik during filming season 3.All the in-between moments we never saw off camera.or basically the Henjei fic we all deserve.





	1. The Audition: Tarjei

**Author's Note:**

> Okayyy so. This is my first fic on here. Please be kind.  
> A couple of things:  
> This is obviously my own interpretation and my opinions.  
> I have the upmost respect for Tarjei and Henrik and that's a reason why I don't state their  
> sexualities in this. Cos we don't know what they identify as, really. So in this fic, whatever happens is just accepted all around.  
> I love those boys and they deserve the privacy they want.  
> Whatever Henjei has in real life, is between them. As it should be.  
> Again, this is my own view of them, alright?  
> Alright, cool.
> 
> This is for the OG Henjei's. You know who you are. :)

"You ready to find your boyfriend?"

I look over at Julie, our director, writer, leader, and the person responsible for my nerves today.  
"Fuck off." I grin at her before taking a sip of my coffee.

It was so early.  
I wasn't fully prepared for today.  
Today Julie and Mari are auditioning boys to be my character Isak's love interest. I don't even know why I'm here...except that Julie said she needed my input and if someone just 'stood right out to me.'  
I take another sip, trying to calm myself.  
This is so important for the show. For Isak. I don't feel qualified enough to help make a decision on things like this.  
The fact that Isak is the main this season is enough on my shoulders. It's crucial that I nail every scene this season. And to do that, I need to have someone I'm comfortable with..which is what I had told Julie.

I'm definietly feeling the pressure.

Whoever we choose; I'm going to have to end up doing some pretty physical things with. I mean, I'm assuming; Julie has only given me episode 1-4 script. And I know we at least have a kiss somewhere.  
I want to be able to relax and feel safe acting across from them. I want palpale chemistry.

"Tarjei?"

Julie's voice brings me out of my thoughts and I look over to see her and Mari staring at me.

"Sorry, what?"

Mari grins. "We're ready to start, you alright?"

"Remember that you don't have to do anything, just sit there and listen. But if you want to interject at anytime, you can. If you feel something with someone, please act on it. That's all I'm asking for. I won't cast anyone who you don't feel comfortable with." Julie cuts in. "If you're making initiative with one of these guys, I'll have you two read a scene. Okay?"

I nod, lean my head back and finish the rest of my coffee. "Let's do this." 

\--

It was almost monotonous. The guy would come in, nervous as fuck, shake our hands and then sit down to answer the questions Julie and Mari had for them.

I would analyse them from my seat. Sometimes enjoying watching them squirm; I know that Julie can be incredibly intimidating. And then on occasion, if they said something interesting or something that we had in common; I would interject and try to converse with them.  
If I felt like I wanted to read a scene with them, I would lightly kick Julie under the table and she would have us read a scene.

Out of the 100+ boys we saw; I only read scenes with about 55 of them. The rest were either too nervous or inexperienced. Some I just downright didn't like them from sight. A few were just...not attractive enough for me to even think of having chemistry with.  
I was close to being bored sometimes; hearing the same things over and over. Having them blatantly kiss Julie's arse.

Only a few handful of them impressed me; and their portfolios were on the smallest pile on the table. They were the ones we would call back to do another round of auditioning. One of them, was this lad Markus. He was this dark hair, dark eyed boy who caught my interest. It was so smooth to converse with him, and I was pleased with how our scene flowed. It felt easy, no effort or challenge at all. I had liked him right off.

Julie turns to me as the latest boy leaves. "We've got two more left. I feel pretty good about today!" She pats the small pile. "Not much selection but at least we have options...We'll call them back and throw a more challenging scene at them to do."

I smile. "A more challenging scene? Like what?" I raise my water to my lips.

Mari raises her eyebrows. "Well, we got to have that sexual chemistry start somewhere."

I choke on my water. "What? Kissing already?"

Julie laughs. "Only for these 5 callbacks. You need to check to see if your chemistry is compatible, and this will be tomorrow so get practicing." She winks.

Rollling my eyes, "I don't need to practice." I sigh and glance at the door. "Do we even need to see these last two guys? I think one of those guys have potential." I gesture to the pitifully small pile.

"You never know T. The next guy could blow your mind." Julie nods at me.

I refrain from rolling my eye again. "Yeah sure. That Markus guy set the bar high though."

"Oooh yeah he was handsome wasn't he?" Mari chimes in.

"He was, but still Tarjei. Let's see thes last two and give them a chance." Julie brushes her hair behind her shoulder. "I mean, imagine we didn't audition you cos we figured we had what we were looking for."

"Alright alright fine, I get your point." I raise my hands and gesture to the door. "Bring in the next Mr. Perfect."

Julie lightly smacks me upside the head. "Arse."

I grin at her as Mari gets up, goes to the door to open it and call out. "Henrik Holm?"

 

As soon as I saw him, it was like the air got knocked out of my lungs.  
What.  
The.  
Fuck.  
He was stunning. This kid was tall, taller than me even. He's wearing jeans and a simple black buttoned shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his forearms. His dark blonde hair is swooped up in this careless looking hairstyle; but I could bet he spent many minutes trying to get every hair into place. And his eyes.  
Fuck. His eyes.  
The most purest colour blue I've ever seen. The sky would be jealous if it knew this colour of blue existed. Sapphires as well.

"HI!" He smiles broadly as he walks over to us.  
I feel my face turn red, and I look down; cursing at the fact that I blush so easily. But damn. This guy is hot.

I see Julie glance at me before taking over. "Henrik. Thank you for coming in to audition for us today."

Henrik shakes Mari's hand and turns to Julie, shaking hers. "Please, I should be thanking you. I'm really excited for this opportunity."

I wipe my hands on my trousers. Why are they sweaty? Get ahold of yourself, Tj.

He turns to me and I take a small breath before meeting his eyes.  
Bad idea.  
Cos now am I not only lost into the bluest sea, but now it's paired with the most radiant smile. A smile that shows his canine teeth, which in turn is making the skin around his eyes crinkle. He is glowing.

I offer him my hand and clear my throat. "Uh yeah hi, uh Henrik. I'm-"

"Tarjei?" He cuts me off, grasping my hand in a firm handshake before letting go. "Sorry, it's just i've watched Skam since season 1. And i'm a fan of your work. You're incredible with the acting choices you make." He finishes, the smile never leaving his face.

I only stare.  
He said it in a way that wasn't brownosing at all, but in a genuine statement. A simple compliment; almost offhand. Like he wasn't expecting a reply.  
I'm not used to that.  
I'm captivated.

Henrik settles in the chair across from us.

"So! I see that you've done some screen work already?" Julie asks. "A tv show called....Halvboren?"

Henrik nods, still holding his smile.

"Thats good, having experience of acting in front of the camera." Julie checks down at his file, then looks back up. "So tell us something you want to share."

Henrik runs a hand through his hair. "Well, actually, how I came to even audition today is funny..."

I can't even concentrate on what his deep voice is saying. My inner self is too busy having a battle.  
Everything about this guy is drawing me in. As soon as he walked into the room, I felt this pull towards him. He was so laid back; yet so energetic. I watch his mannerisms as he talks; he is so animated with his massive hands. And not in the nervous way. I couldnt sense nerves at all within this boy. He seems so at ease. So in control. Almost like he's known us for years.  
I'm on the brink of feeling overwhelmed. I need to figure him out before I explode in my damn mind. Why am I feeling this way? I need to know. I've barely said 3 words to him yet all I want to do is be in his presence for the infinite future. I want to bask in this light that he projects.

Henrik throws his head back anad laughs at something Mari's saying.  
Fuck it.

"Can we read a scene together?" I blurt out.

Julie snaps her head over to me, but I'm staring only at Henrik; directing the question to him. My cheeks burning.

His eyes hold my gaze, then slowly that smile returns. "I would love that."

Julie quickly shares a look with Mari before handing me the scripts. I stand up and force my shaky legs to where Henrik was already standing. He follows me further into the room and I hand him the scripts.

"Boys, I'm turning the camera on for this, okay?" Mari's voice is saying somwhere to my right.

I can only nod, my mouth is dry. I was nervous. A rarity for me, since I hardly get nervous. But this boy, Henrik. His presence is intoxicating me. I don't know what the fuck this is. And i'm desperate to see how this will be; i'm almost terrifed.  
Keeping my eyes on Henrik, I take him in as he reads through the script. I know this scene by heart; but I want to give him some time to process through it. He is in utter concentration. I watch his eyes move back and forth as he reads over the lines, his mouth moving silenty.

I wonder what he is thinking. I wonder if maybe i'll actually see nerves creep up on him. He smiles slightly to himself and my heart gives a loud thump in my chest. What the fuck is happening: Why am I so affected by him? Is he even remotely feeling this..connection..between us?  
As if he heard my thoughts, Henrik's eyes snap up to lock with mine; and he winks.

Oh my god.

"Whenever you're ready." Julie's voice booms.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath in. Relax. You've done this scene several times. Just act as you would normally. Don't think. Feel. I let my mind clear and I find Isak; letting him fully consume my mind. Snapbacks, biology, closeted. I let out my breath and open my eyes.

Oh fuck.

Even.

Even is standing right in front of me.

He laughs. A full on laugh with those crinkly eyes. "DId you really think there's land mines in Tjome?" He moves slightly closer to me.

"I dont-I don't fucking know? You can't...you can't joke about something like that!" I stutter out, raising my hand in exasperation.

Why the fuck am I stuttering, I've never done that line like that.

He chuckles again, leaning closer still. "I could've joked about somethign way worse!" His smile taking up his entire face.

I shake my head at him and try to hold back my smile, "Nei! That's a very serious thing to joke about."

"I could've joked about a dick."

Wait. That's not-

"But that would've gone too far."

Did he...did he just improvise? He was supposed to just laugh and stare until I delivered my technology line.  
Suddenly my body is filled with excitement; he's challeging me. Game on.

I roll my eyes at him, "Dick." i say in an almost fond disbelief, and look down; fully embracing my blush.

"Too far." He laughs breathily, taking one more calculated step towards me.

He's so close, I could reach out and touch him.

"But uh." I clear my throat. "I don't think that aluminium technology.."

"Oh was that what gave me away?" He questions teasingly, lowering his head to try and catch my eye.

I swallow and nod. "But um...she's...she's sweet." I look at the groud for a moment more before meeting his eyes for all of one second. I almost gasp; his gaze is too fucking intense and I drop my eyes back to the ground. "Sonja." I drip the word with jealousy.

I sense him move closer to me, inch by excruciating inch. The air between us is electric. The unspoken words and want is so thick yet slowly diminishing as he angles his head closer to mine. Our bodies acting on their own, knowing that they are close to getting what it desires with our minds.  
My brain projects a white noise as I feel his breath hit my cheek. His hair tickles my forehead as he painfully gets his full lips near mine.

"CUT!"

Fuck. FUCK FUCK.

I close my eyes and sense Henrik move away from me. I put Isak away and pull myself back out. Or what it just me this whole time-? and open my eyes.  
Henrik is standing a couple of meters from me; one hand through his hair, the other on his slightly heaving chest.  
Blue meets green, and this time I don't break away. We stare at each other, unashamedly. Words flashing behind our eyes, and unsaid on our lips. Yet I understood.  
Henrik nods to me and I return it with a small smile.

He feels it too.

"Um, wow. Well, thank you for your audition Henrik." Mari comes from seemingly nowhere and forces Henriks eyes away from mine. "We will contact you within the next 24 hours to let you know if you make it to the next round of callbacks." She holds out her hand and Henrik puts the script in it, before moving toward the door.

"Thank you." Henrik nods to all of us. He stops at the doorway before turning back to me. "Thank you Tarjei, that was an honour." He smiles and winks once more before shutting the door behind him.

I haven't moved since Julie called cut. I haven't stopped staring at the place Henrik stood, as Even. I can't even begin to process what just took place. All of this i'm feeling, all of what Isak is feeling; it's too much. He just gave me what I craved for in an acting partner. He made me realise: I dont want someone easy, someone who will just follow the rules. I need someone to challenge me. And he did. He fucking did.  
I know he feels what I am feeling.  
And I don't know what to do.  
Except one thing is for sure-

"What...the fuck was that Tarjei?" Julie's voice breaking into me.

Spell broken, I turn to her. "I'm not seeing anymore potentials Julie." The calmness in my voice is surprising me.

Julie cocks an eyebrow at me. "Go on? Why do you say that?"

I smile. She knew.

"I found him."

I walk over to the table and grab the pitiful pile of portfolios. Walking over to the bin, i throw them down with flourish.

Julie comes over to me, places her hands on my shoulders and stares into my soul. "You sure about this? This is all up to you T."

My smile widens as sudden joy fills me and I almost burst out laughing. "I found him Julie! I found Isaks love. I found my Even."


	2. The First Kiss: Henrik

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first time Henrik and Tarjei are alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOWWWW Thank you all so much for your kind comments in the first chapter!! I'll try to respond to all of them soon. I honestly didn't think a lot of people would read this...  
> I'll try to be steady with uploading a new chapter AT LEAST once a week. Maybe like every Sunday? Depending on time... I may also surprise you and upload a couple chapters throughout the week :) WHO KNOWS?! I do have a full time job but I'll try to stay consistent alrighty?  
> Thanks again for the kudos, you're all so nice.  
> i'm legalskam on twitter. come say hi if you'd like
> 
> anyway, hope you like it

From learning about the Skam audition to now, with me on my way to the first cast read through; you could say that it's been an odd week of my life.

I still can't believe they chose me. I thought I had blown it.  
What was I thinking?? Improvising like that? Improvising a script that Julie herself had written?!  
...Why did they choose me?  
I had just gotten home and told my mother everything that had happened; I was almost depressed laying on my bed...for two hours. Then Julie herself called me.

I smile to myself as I walk down the street. Two hours.

I still can't fucking believe it.

And here I am, ready to meet the entire cast for the first episode read through.  
Julie had explained over the phone that she likes to keep her actors somewhat in the dark with the plotline. So far only Tarjei is the one who knows most of what's going on. Everyone else just gets the next episode script 1-2 days before we shoot.  
I'm stoked. I love an acting challenge. It'll be exciting to learn more about my character. So far all I know is that I'm Tarjei's love interest.

Well, not Tarjei..his character Isak's love interest. But still.

My smile widens on his own.

Tarjei.

God, he's so much better looking in person. I was so nervous when I saw that he was in the room. I'm such a fan of his work. His facial expressions during season 1 moved me to tears sometimes. Without words, he expressed such broken emotion.

Fuck. How am I supposed to act opposite of that?

I let out my breath and allow my mind drift to what happened in that audition room.

He seemed so cool on the outside, going through our scene; but I noticed his shaking hands, dilated pupils and short of breath.

He had felt it too.

Whatever this 'it' is. I don't understand what myself. All I know is that it hit me hard and took hold of my entire core. As soon as I saw him, I felt a connection. But it wasn't until we were acting opposite each other that that connection turned into something stronger than a diamond. It took my breath away. It lit my body from my hair to my feet. And when Julie called "cut". I almost screamed, I didn't want that feeling to end.

And it didn't.

And it still hasn't.

I stop, realizing where I am, and look at my destination. NRK building. The group is meeting in one of the conference rooms on the third floor. Everyone will be there.

Including Tarjei.

Who I haven't seen since the audition 4 days ago.  
4 days. And I still feel like this.

I wipe my sweaty palms against my hoodie. What am I supposed to say to him? 'HI?' That seems so formal. Its almost like we're past all of that awkwardness and should be into casualness with each other.  
I grin, my plan suddenly forming in my mind. I steady my shoulders and walk inside.

\--

"Henrik! Everyone, this is Henrik Holm. He's going to be playing Even." Julie throws her arm around me and pulls me closer to the long table where everyone is sitting. 

A chorus of 'HI's' and 'hello's' are thrown back at me. I nod at them all, beaming. But there's one I haven't gotten a greeting from.

Tarjei wont look up from the table at me.  
Fuck.

Was it all in my head? Did I imagine that he felt that connection as much as I did?

"Henrik, go take the empty seat next to Tarjei, your own copy of your script is there. DONT LOSE IT." Julie gives me a glare before softening it with a smile.

I laugh. "I'll do my best."

Everyone has gone back to their own conversations around the table, except Tarjei, who is still apparently very interested in the top of the table. I walk over to the empty chair next to him and plop myself down. Better do it now before I lose my nerve.

"Hey boyfriend, I missed you."

Tarjei's head snaps up to meet mine, mouth slightly ajar and..Yes! He's blushing. 

"Wh-what?" He mutters out, that beautiful red spreading across his cheeks.

I can't contain my ever-growing grin. "Well, I AM your boyfriend now." 

Tarjei smiles back at me, "Yes but Isak's. Not mine."

There's that confidence I knew he had. I can't help myself but tease him.

"What? Am I not good enough to be both? That cuts deep babe." I place a hand over my heart and look offended.

"No! No-no I mean..of course you are- I mean. I just-" 

"Tarjei, I'm joking. I wanted to cut whatever tension you and I may of had." I nudge his shoulder with mine. "We're going to be together a lot these next few months. I wanted to get that initial awkwardness out of the way."

"Oh." Tarjei clears his throat. "Uh yeah, that's actually what I had in mind too. I was going to ask if you wanted to stay after so we can just chill together by ourselves, maybe go over the first scene." He grins. "But you beat me to it."

I smile at him. "That would be great." and because I can't help myself. "Its a date." I wink.

There it is, that blush is back. Damn he is cute.

"ALRIGHT" Julie's voice rings out over the table, silencing whatever conversations were still going. "Lets get started on this. We're reading episode 1 and the first half of episode 2. Now as you all know, this is the only time we read as a cast. All future scripts either myself or Mari will personally give to you. Please memorise as soon as you get scripts."  
She looks at Marlon, who puts his hands up and mouths "who? me?"  
Tarjei laughs at that and I almost fall out of my chair.

Oh my god. His laugh. Its beautiful. I look over and see the 3 dimples appear.  
Shit.

"Yes you Marlon. Now." Julie claps her hands once and sits in the chair at the head of the table. "Episode one, clip one. Lykke Til Isak. Lets go."

 

\---

 

David is an enthusiastic hugger, that's for sure.

"So glad to meet you man! Can't wait to see more of you." David says.

I smile and nod. "Likewise!" 

David turns to Tarjei, "Are you coming TJ? Jakob wants to go get food before we all head out tonight."

Tarjei shakes his head. "Nah dude, I'm passing on all of that today." He gestures to me. "Henrik and I are going to stay and work on scenes together."

"Boring." David huffs.

"You do realise we start filming in 2 days? Filming a scene which YOU are in." Tarjei laughs.

David rolls his eyes. "Yeah but I have like 3 lines." He grins at Tarjei. "But alright mate, see you later." He salutes him and then me before leaving the room.

Just me and Tarjei now. He comes over and sits in the chair across from me.

"So. TJ?" I ask.

Tarjei lets out a soft laugh. "Yeah, nickname my friends call me. Tarjei is kind of a mouthful so.."

Oh, he is just too easy.

I cock my eyebrow. "Is he now?"

Tarjei looks confused for a split second before realisation dawns and maroon floods his face. "No! Or yes!? Or..that's not what I meant-"

I burst out laughing, my mouth as wide as it can be. 

Tarjei leans over and smacks me in the arm. "Fucker."

"Hey." I whine, rubbing my arm. "That hurt. What, do you work out?"

"I actually do. I love going to the gym" He responds. "Do you?"

I shake my head. "I do sometimes but no, not really."

He nods. Then opens his mouth, "So why did you audition for Skam?"

 

And that's how we spent the next couple of hours. 

Questions, back and forth. Sometimes giving short answers, sometimes giving lengthy ones. Which in turn would start a discussion, both of us giving our sides; respecting the others opinions. Laughing, teasing, joking...letting the other have a glimpse into the others mind.

It was so easy.  
It was so. fucking. effortless talking with him.  
It was like we clicked. Right away. On every level.  
I was entranced by him. By the way he speaks, how he can be so confident in one moment, but shy and quiet the next. The way he becomes passionate when talking about theatre or Skam. The fondness in his eyes when he speaks of his family and friends. He would get on a tangent and speak for a solid 5 minutes about something; and all I could do was stare. I didn't want to miss a moment. The way his emerald eyes would light up, or his cupid bow lips would stretch out over his adorable gapped teeth. He was intelligent beyond his years. His maturity far exceeding my own, admittedly.  
It felt like conversing with my oldest friend. How simple the camaraderie was between us. And with every moment, I felt our connection grow stronger.

I also started to feel another emotion inside me rise.

I was distracted by his habit of having his tongue wet his lips. Every time he did that, it took me a moment to focus on what he was saying. Cos then all I could think about was how those lips would feel against mine. How if that tongue would fight against mine in our joined mouths. I knew that we would have physical scenes together. And personally, I would rather take control of this tension between us privately first, before going on camera.

Tarjei glances down at the script between us, then looks up at me. "So, shall we go over the scene?" Out comes that damn tongue to wet his lips.

I almost groan, does he not feel this? This need. This ache. Does he not want to explore that part of our apparent connection?  
I need to find out. 

So I slowly, knowingly, wet my lips with my tongue; keeping my eyes locked on his face.

Tarjei watches my movement steadily, his eyes not leaving my mouth. I suppress a smirk. Good.

I do it one more time, his eyes burning holes into my lips, before I open my mouth, "Yeah, yeah we could.." I trail off. "Or.."

"We could rehearse our kissing." Tarjei snaps his mouth shut, closing his eyes.

My stomach bursts into butterflies. Fuck, this is what I want. But I need to let Tarjei take control of this. "Rehearse our kissing.." I repeat, making sure he can hear the smile in my words.

Tarjei opens his eyes and fixates them with mine. Neither of us saying a word.

The air is thick. The sexual tension is building itself between us, I can almost see it. The only sound is our breathing, both of ours becoming shallow in small puffs.

Then Tarjei smirks. He actually smirks at me! And wets his lips with his tongue, intentionally agonizing me.

A moan slips out of me on its own accord. Shit.

Silence.

"Fuck this!" Tarjei groans and leans over the table, grasping the back of my head, and connecting our lips.

It was like the heavens opened up and is sending down beams of light on only us.  
There is only us.  
Me and Tarjei.

His lips were better than I could ever have fathomed. Softer. Gentle.  
We don't move them, its just a simple press of our mouths.  
His hand moves to caress the side of my face.  
I couldn't even process all the yelling in my mind before we break away.  
Wait. No. No. No. I am not done.

Tarjei smiles at me, and cocks an eyebrow.  
Oh you fucker.  
That's it.  
I stand up and half run around the table to where he is now standing. He opens his mouth to probably say something cocky but I don't give him the chance.  
I place both my hands on the side of his face and reconnect our mouths.

This time our lips move. and fuck, do they move well together.  
I run my tongue against his cupid bow lips and he opens up for me. I take bold swipes inside his mouth, taking and taking. Tarjei opens wider and lets me. His tongue moving to slide against mine. He maneuvers his hands to my waist, pulling me closer to him. I move one of my hands to his hair, the other on his lower back. My hand in his hair gives a little tug, and Tarjei moans softly.  
The sound goes straight to my cock. I press him closer to me, our bodies flush against each other, our mouths fighting furiously. I turn him and walk us so that his back is leaning against the table. He slides his arms so that they're around my neck. I sense the change to softness and move my hands to hold him around his waist.

We both slow down and pull away from each other at the same time. I can't stop the elated grin I know I have spreading across my face. "Hey boyfriend."

Tarjei rolls his eyes before he smiles fondly up at me. "Hey boyfriend."

I brush some of the curls off of his forehead and slide my hand to caress his cheek. The 3 dimples appearing instantly.

He laughs. "Well, good to know that you also feel whatever the fuck was formed between us at your audition."

I raise my eyebrows at him. "Are you kidding? I've been freaking out these past 4 days cos I couldn't figure out if you truly felt it like I did."

Tarjei shifts his hand and traces my lips with his fingertips. "The feeling never left me from that moment. and now.." He leans up and gently kisses my wanting lips before finishing, "And now its grown. Tusen times more."

I tighten my hold around his waist, and lean down to meet his lips again. I'm addicted now. And I almost get lost again before he pulls away slightly.

"Do you..do you think we'll ever get used to this?" Tarjei chuckles nervously. "This 'thing' we have?" He moves his hands to my shoulders, feeling them.

I smile at him with as much tenderness as I could, stroking his cheek, "I hope not." and I attach our needy lips together once more.


	3. The Laugh and the Paper Towels: Tarjei

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Henrik's first day on set.

I turn off the alarm on my phone and roll back onto my bed; staring at the ceiling.  
It's Saturday. Today was the day; Henrik's first day on set.

A grin spreads across my face. I'm so damn excited. I mean, he and I don't speak to each other in this particular scene, but at least he'll be there. Acting against me.

Ever since our kiss a couple of days ago, I've been curious as to how we'll act around each other on set. How we interact. Do I take control? Do I let him? Or should we just..let each other do as they feel?

After our kiss, Henrik and I actually did sit down and go over our upcoming scenes this week. Throwing ideas back and forth. And nothing was awkward. Nothing had changed. If anything our bond seemed stronger. We talked as we had before, but closer. Effortless and natural. And when we left, nothing was expected or forced. We walked to the bus stop, hugged and parted. Simple. No kiss goodbye, there wasn't a need for one.  
I just wish I knew what to do with it. How to deal with what I'm feeling. How to make sure we both are on the same tune.

You're overthinking it Tarjei.

I sigh. I haven't seen him in 4 days, and not once did he leave my mind. I almost crave to be in his presence..to explore all these things I'm feeling with him. To discuss.  
Maybe that's what I need to do. Discuss this connection business with him.

Renewed, I jump out of bed and walk to my closet. I have a scene I'm filming with Carl and Rakel this morning before heading to Nissen for the other. I need to start getting ready if I want to catch the right bus.  
This is day 2 for me. Last night, most of the cast filmed the beginning party scene at Julie's friends house. I smirk. That was fun. Sacha and Marlon got so high towards the end that I could barely say my lines. And I got to make out with Ruby for a bit. Which is great, if you enjoy making out with one of your best friends girlfriend. Alfred said he's just going to skip that part. But I have a feeling he's going to bring this up to get me to buy him lunch for a week or something.

*ping*

Thoughts interrupted, I swivel and walk to my phone on my bed. Who the hell is texting me at 5.30 in the morning?  
I see his name across my screen, and my smile returns instantly.

_Henrik: Hey. Have fun filming this morning. Can't wait to see you later._

**hahah thanks..what are you doing awake??**

_Henrik: Fucking nerves._

**Pssh. Don't worry about it. You don't have any lines today really, so you can't fuck it up.**

_Henrik: Wow. Your words of advice are overwhelming_

**I aim to please**

_Henrik: Oh I'm sure you do :)_

I feel my face flame. God damnit. How does he make me blush without even being here?

**You know what I meant**

_Henrik: Mmhmm_

I huff out a laugh and set my phone back onto my bed before turning to look in my full length mirror on my closet door.

I can't believe that this is where my life is at.

Acting has always been a part of me. Stage. Film. It's what fuels me. It's what I've always wanted to do and be.  
And sure, I"ve had a fair amount of acting moments where I think I've nailed it, or think 'wow yeah this will be a challenge.' But already, I can tell that acting with Henrik will be in a league of it's own.  
His perceptions and choices he wants to do on set ignites me. He's such a thorough actor, and I cannot wait to get into that zone with him. See what he chooses, see what I could throw back.

Isak deserves to have his story told in the best way possible, and between Henrik and I, we will show it.

 

\---

 

The snapbacks.

I had decided early on that that is how I get into my mind block. As soon as the snapback goes on, Isak is here. Even if the scene doesn't call for him wearing one, I wear it right up to the moment I go on camera.  
It's pivotal. Snapbacks. Beanies. Hoodies. Isak is always covering up. Hiding himself, almost. Putting on façade. 

That was my routine. Come on set, chat with people for a bit, grab a snapback, find a corner and review the upcoming scene until Julie comes over to discuss her scene vision.  
For 2 seasons, that's how I went about coming on set.

Until Henrik changed that.

He arrived 10 minutes after I did. I was talking to David, twirling the grey snapback I was going to wear in this scene in my hands, when he walked in. Every time I see him, It's like I almost had forgotten how attractive he is. And so fucking tall.

His eyes dart around at the bustle of the organised chaos until they find mine, he beams and heads my way. 

"Are you blushing?" David asks me.

I look over at him. "Nah." As I feel the heat spread across my face.

David lets out a bark of a laugh. "Fuck man, you are!" He looks over at Henrik making his way towards us, opens his mouth, then shuts it; shaking his head.

I resist rolling my eyes. David has been one of my best friends since I was a kid. I can read him better than himself. "What?"

He gives me a slight smile. "We'll talk later."

Henrik reaches us at that moment. "Hey David!"

David throws his arms around him in a giant hug. "Hey dude!" He slaps his back.

I smile fondly at them and see Julie over their shoulders, staring at them in a curious way. She catches my eye and winks. I flip her off as she turns away laughing.

They break apart, finally and Henrik turns to me.  
I feel the butterflies arise in my stomach as he leans closer to my ear. 

"Hey boyfriend" he almost purrs.

"H-Hi." I mangage to flush out. I keep my head raised though, meeting his sapphires.

Henrik smiles adoringly and reaches out to pull me against his chest, engulfing me in his lanky arms.  
I relax instantly, resting my own arms around his waist, my head still raised to meet his. He lifts his hand and gently runs his fingers in my hair; tracing them down to my cheek where he stops to rub a thumb against my cheekbone. My mind is nothing but contentment. Breathing is hard yet effortless. The weight of stress is gone off my shoulders. Nothing else matters but the fact that I am in his arms, and that our eyes haven't left the others. Henrik lets out a silent sigh, and I can almost feel him melt; apparently finding relief in my presence. That thought jolts me.  
He slides his hand down more to my arm, tugging it so it falls between us as he grasps my hand; giving it a affectionate squeeze. I gaze at him, almost longingly before he winks at me, and lets go of my hand.  
I almost let a whine escape me.

David clears his throat. "So, uh, first day! You excited??"

I had forgotten that their were other people in the room. I quickly glance around, catching Julie's eye immediately yet again. She smiles at me knowingly, before nodding and turning away.

"I am!" Henrik grins at him. "A bit nervous though. But that's expected." He shrugs.

"HEY! HENRIK!"

We all turn to see Serena, our head of wardrobe, calling towards us. "Come get dressed please. Scene setup start in 10 minutes." She beckons with her index finger before turning and briskly walking away.

Henrik turns to me. "Are you coming?"

I resist the urge of teasing him about being alone on his first day; so instead I smile and gesture to myself. "Already done. Isak is simple with clothes. I'm certain Even will be more put together." I laugh.

Henrik chuckles. "Oh I can tell you right now, he will be king of layers." He nods at David before quickly turning back to me. "Hey, would you mind waiting for me though? I thought maybe we could get into character together."

"Uh yeah sure." I nod at him, slightly confused. He smiles before turning back around and running to catch up with Serena.

David raises his eyebrows at me. "When you told me you two had some form of 'thing'." He makes the air quotes with his hands." I didn't know it was that deep!"

I nod, almost sighing. "I know."

"Wow. T." David knocks into my shoulder. "Just...just remember you're not Isak alright?"

I snap my head to meet his. "What's that suppose to mean?" My tone coming out harsher than I intended.

David holds up his hands. "Chill dude. All i'm saying is just remember that Isak falls for Even. Tarjei and Henrik are two separate people."

This time i do roll my eyes. "Look, I know whatever Henrik and I have is strange and fast and fuck, neither he or I can explain it but.." I look over across the room to the door where Henrik disappeared into. "Whatever clicked between Henrik and I happened the moment he stepped into the room. We haven't done a full scene as Isak and Even yet." I shrug. "And to be completely honest, I'm almost terrified of what will happen when I'm Isak and he's Even. I got a taste of it at his audtion and that was.." I trail off, waving my hand.

"I know." David laughs. "I saw the tape."

"What?" I laugh with him. "When?"

"Julie has been shoving it in everyones faces, telling us that she can't believe what happened between you two." David grins at me. "It looked intense dude."

I smile. "It kinda was."

"ALRIGHT EVERYONE. Scene setup in 5 minutes!"  
I jump at the sound of Mari's voice in an airblower.

"Listen, I know you're very professional and the greatest actor of our time," David continues over my protest huff, "but just, be careful alright? I don't want to see you get hurt." He pats me on the shoulder and heads over to Marlon and Sacha who just walked in and waved at us.

Fuck. Right. The scene. I've been so caught up in my own world, i almost forgot the point of today.  
I let David's words leave my mind as I smooth my hair with my free hand and close my eyes. I take a breath and place the grey snapback, backwards on my head. Breathe. In. Out. Isak. Broken family. Broken soul. Longing for acceptance-

My thoughts get interrupted when a pair of rather large hands place themselves on my waist and a deep voice in my ear. 

"Hey babe."

I try to hide my smile filling my face and fail. "Hey boyfriend."

Henrik laughs and turns me around to face him.

My eyes widen and I almost gasp.

There he is. Even. Wearing a jean jacket, dark grey shirt and tan trousers. Blonde James Dean.  
And his hair-

"Do I look alright?" Henrik stands back and spins for me. "Not the way I would normally do my hair but.."

I shake my head. "No. No no you look great. Wow." I'm being over enthusiastic. Chill.

Henrik smirks knowingly at me, then reaches out and touches the curls escaping under my cap. "This is adorable. You in a snapback..." He lightly bites his lips and winks before fully smiling with his crinkly eyes.

He is making it incredibly difficult for me to not fling myself into his arms and ruin that hairstyle by pulling. Focus Tarjei. You're literally about to go on camera.  
I clear my throat. "So uh, you wanted to get into character together? How were you thinking we do that?" 

"Yeah here follow me." Henrik grabs my hand and pulls me out into the hallway. The crew stares at us curiously as we pass them, and I try to smile at them. 

"Henrik? The scene is honestly going to be starting any minute. Julie would beat you if you're late on your first day." I tease.

Henrik opens an empty classroom door and pulls me inside. "We won't be long." He backs me into the now closed door. "I just wanted to be alone with you for a moment."

I feel my breath hitch. Oh.

Henrik places his hands against the door, one on each side of my head. "Sorry, I'm sure you have your own way of getting into your zone but.." He lifts one hand and cups my cheek, rubbing softly. "I just needed time with you to calm myself down."

I raise my eyebrows slightly. "And I help calm you down?"

He nods before focusing on my lips; moving closer to brush his nose against my opposite cheek, and letting out a full body sigh. It was if he was just grounding himself. "I just feel so, I dunno...at peace when I'm near you. Like everything slows down and makes sense." I can feel his warm breath across my face as he continues his trail of soft touches.

I gulp. Barely nodding. "I...I know the feeling." I manage to whisper. My mind is exploding in several different directions. The one screaming loudest was 'just fucking kiss me already.' 

Henrik pulls back, as if reading my mind and raises his eyebrows at me, almost asking permission. I lean my head up slightly to him and his grin widens before leaning to close the gap between us.  
And just before his lips touch mine, a thought jumps into my mind and out my mouth. 

"Wait."

He stops immediately and pulls back. "You alright?" He searches my face in confusion.

I smile at him reassuringly. "Yeah yeah sorry I just..I had a thought."

"Go on."

"This scene we're filming...its our first time seeing the other, I think." I pause, feeling slightly self conscious. "I think we shouldn't kiss until after we film it...to you know...." I wave my hand between us.

Henrik smirks. "To get that tension maybe?" He cocks his head at me. "This is a good idea T."

Fucking blush everytime.....

"You have a lot more willpower than I have though. Today is going to drag until I can kiss you again." He pouts. "It's been too long."

I roll my eyes fondly at him. "Its been 4 days calm down. And it'll be just as hard for me, I'm the one staring at you longer."

Henrik raises one eyebrow at me. "Oh? You don't think Even hasn't noticed Isak before this? Hasn't wanted to get Isak to notice him for days?"

I mimic his eyebrow raise. "And you do?"

He nods. "Someone as beautiful as you? Absolutely."

"Him. You mean."

"No. You." He answers.

I wasn't expecting that. I open and shut my mouth before I lick my lips with my tongue out of habit. Henrik almost groans and touches my wet lips with his thumb, smoothing them out.

"Hey. We should-" He begins before we hear shouting. 

"TARJEI FUCKING SANDVIK MOE AND HENRIK FUCKING HOLM IF YOU ARE NOT IN THIS ROOM IN 10 SECONDS YOU'RE FIRED!"

"Fuck!"

We both scramble and I throw the door open; bolting down the hall towards a livid Julie. I know I'm going to get my arse chewed.

But I don't stop grinning.

 

\---

 

"Henrik and Tarjei, 19:00 here tomorrow. And for the love of God, do not pull that shit again. Whatever you two need to do, make sure you make time to do it before you waste ours." Julie glares at us.

I know she'll be over this by tomorrow, she probably already is; but it is amusing to see Henrik almost piss himself. "Okay, Sorry again Julie." I nod at her.

"Yeah sorry, really. It was my-" I elbow Henrik in the arm. Less is more with her. Thankfully he gets the point and shuts up.

Julie rolls her eyes at us. "Whatever. Good work today boys, good chemistry, good tension." Then she winks at us. "Keep it up. Now go." She shoos us out of the room and slams the door.

Henrik turns to me. "Remind me never to set her off ever again."

I burst out laughing. "Fuck dude you should see your face! You do realize that she was over it the moment after she was done yelling right?" I start walking down the staircase to the exit.

He follows me and matches my pace. "Shit, it didn't seem like it!"

I nudge him with my arm. "You'll get used to her personality soon enough. Under that hard exterior is a big soft bear."

"A bear that will rip my head off." He responds.

"But also a bear that will fight to the death for you." I smile softly at him.

Henrik turns his head towards me as we push open the doors. "You know, I really do feel so honoured to be apart of this show's history."

The cold air hits us, and I pull up my hoodie over my head, "It's definitely changed my life. That's for sure."

Henrik half smiles at me before zipping up his jacket higher, bracing himself against the gust of wind.

We walk in silence towards the bus stop. I force myself to walk a little slower. Even though I know I'm going to see him tomorrow, I want to prolong my time with him. A million thoughts run through my head. There's still things he and I should probably talk about, but until then, I just want to act on how I feel. And I need to feel him.

"I want-"

"Can I-"

Henrik laughs. "You go first."

We get to the bus stop and I turn, facing him.

"Can I kiss you?" I hold my gaze with his.

His smile broadens. "I want to kiss you.. Was what I was going to say. So..."

Blushing, I take a step forward and wrap my arms around his neck, his automatically going around my waist, pulling me closer. I rub our noses together slightly, and he giggles. He giggles! I bite my lip to stop the grin filling my face. That was the cutest sound I've ever heard. Henrik rubs his thumbs into the small of my back, pushing me flush against him. I cock an eyebrow at him before closing that space and placing my lips against his.  
Immediately, we both sigh and move our mouths together. Sensing, connecting. It just feels so right. Everything about us feels right. Whatever the fuck 'us' even is.  
His lips are so thick and soft, they engulf mine and I let them. Our mouths already finding familiarity with the other. Henrik swipes at my bottom lip and I gasp to give him access. His tongue brushes against mine and I have to hold back a moan, remembering that we are in a public place. Where anyone can see us-fuck. I pull my mouth away quickly. 

Henrik brings a hand up and holds my face. "Everything okay?

"Yes. Yeah sorry I just.." I take a breath. "We're in public and just with Jodel users everywhere. Julie would actually murder us if they caught a photo of us and put two and two together."

He nods. "Oh yeah makes sense. Damnit." He looks down at me, smirking. "Does this mean I have to let go of you now?" 

I chuckle. "Unfortunately." I unlock my arms around his neck.

"Fine." He frowns and releases his arms around me. I move to step away from him but he reaches out and grasps my hand. "Is this alright though? I just...I don't want to stop touching you."

"It..its fine." I stutter out;feeling that now familiar heat spread across my face.

As if on cue, my bus pulls up. I squeeze Henriks hand. "See you tomorrow then?" I move to let go but he yanks me into his chest; holding me in a tight hug.

"See you tomorrow babe." He murmurs, placing a kiss on my forehead before setting me lose.

I turn and half stumble onto the bus, sitting in the first seat I find. As we pull away, I look behind to see him staring after the bus, a smile still on his face.  
My heart gives a hard thump and I drop my head into my hands.  
What the hell have I got myself into with this boy.

 

\---

 

My red snapback was already on when Henrik got to set. I'm sitting in Isaks spot on the theatre room stairs, reading through the script, when I feel him sit down next to me. 

"Hey boyfriend." Came his usual greeting.

I playfully roll my eyes. "Hey boyfriend." I squint my eyes at him. "Are you going to say that too me everytime you see me?" 

Henrik shrugs. "Probably. It's our thing now."

"Our thing eh?" 

"Yup." He pops the p. "Our thing. Along with making out and constantly touching." He laughs and bumps his shoulder against mine.

I feel my heart flutter. I should ask him now. He may just laugh this off, but for me; I do need to know lines and borders. I need to know what I can and can't do. Henrik is just so full of life. Such a carefree person. No doubt, He doesn't give this connection a second thought, he probably just reacts to it as he feels. But I cant, I'm still confused as to what all of this is.

"Hey uh, Henrik?" 

Henrik turns his body towards mine, giving me his full attention. He probably can sense my mood turn. "Yes?"

I swallow. "Would you want to hang out after we film? We could go chill at my place. I have the entire basement to myself." I shrug.

It was like someone lit a switch inside of him, like his entire body was beaming at me. The radiating smile growing across his face. "That would be great! Yeah I want to come hang out."

"Cool. I'll order us food and stuff. Kick your arse in Fifa."

"You fucking wish." He sticks his tongue out at me. "No but this sounds fun. It'll be nice to just chill together, not at work setting."

I nod, grinning. "Exactly. We need to bond." 

Henrik chuckles. "Bond. Yeah, something like that." He puts an arm around me and pulls me closer, kissing the top of my head. "No kissing today right?" he asks, sighing.

"No kissing until after yup." I glance up at him. "So, shall we go over lines?"

 

\---

 

It was our first scene with dialogue with each other. And it was incredible. Henrik just makes things run so smoothly; yet creates these challenges that I'm learning to love overcoming. He keeps me on my toes, sometimes improvising, sometimes following the script. We shot the scene at least 7 different ways, with multiple different camera angles. 

I felt Isak's nerves flow through me. Sitting next to this hot boy you only just saw the other day. Trying to keep your cool, don't show your gay; but then him throwing you for a loop with a dick joke. Attempting to keep up a conversation that wouldn't bore this beautiful man. Stuttering over your words because his smile and laugh had left you completely breathless. Having his hand linger as it grazes your own to give you the shared joint.

Unfortunately, since Marlon wasn't here to secretly switch it out, the weed was fake. But still, it was a wonderful prop. Getting to place my lips where his lips had been. And poor Emma. Henrik's acting choices with his expressions to her were so realistic. Isak, being the nice guy he is, had no idea that Even was trying to get rid of her from his body language.

It was a good fucking night. I kept wanting more. To keep going. This is the beginning of Isak and Even's story, and I just never want to end. I've become obsessed with acting against Henrik. With that way we give and take from each other. I've never had an acting partner like this. Ever.

"Alright. Lets go home. Tarjei? Hey, shall we go to your place?"

I shake my head to clear my thoughts, registering that Henrik has been talking to me.  
"Yeah, sorry." I turn and grin up at him.

"Oh you've come back to me." He teases, winking.

Ignoring that, I spin around and walk towards the doors. "Lets go then"

Henrik jogs to catch up with me, snickering.

As soon as we're in the hallway towards the main exit doors, I grab Henrik and shove him against the wall.

"Ow! What-"

Grabbing his face, I kiss him. Hard. He responds instantly, one of his hands threading through my hair, the other on my lower back, pressing me into him. I bite his top lip and he groans softly. Taking advantage, I push my tongue inside, fighting with his until his mouth widens and lets mine take control. I move a hand into his soft hair and give a slight tug. This time i'm rewarded with a louder moan. 

He pulls off, "Fuck." 

I start kissing down his jawline, nibbling when I get to the protruding bone beneath his ear.

"Tarjei. Babe. You've got to stop."

I groan in protest, right next to his ear before I graze it with my teeth and pull away from him.

Henrik looks almost wrecked. His face is flushed with his chest heaving. I glance down and he his length pressing against his jeans.

I smirk. "Lets go home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helloo.  
> Thank you again for all your kind comments. They truly do make my day.  
> Sorry this is such a late update, with everything that happened in London this weekend...I put off finishing this chapter for a couple of days.
> 
> This chapter was important to help set up later events. sorry if it was kinda boring..THE SMUT IS COMING I PROMISE!
> 
> Hope you like it! If you have questions, feel free to comment or come chat with me on twitter. i'm snapbackskam
> 
> ps: i have no clue how to add like, photos and emojis...or how to italicize the text parts...like i said, i'm really really awful with technology and such, so bare with me as i learn and grow with each chapter haha
> 
> also if someone wants to tell me how to do all that. That'd be fantastic.


	4. The Time in Tarjei's Bed: Henrik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thank you for you're nice comments, I finally got a chance to respond to you xx made my day.  
> Sorry for not posting sooner, life gets busy! But for sure I will always get a chapter posted each week :)  
> Hang in there. I promise it gets better and smuttier.  
> OH and I've decided to continue this story clear up into filming s4 so.  
> also soz in advance, I'm still trying to figure out this writing format and skins and all that shit that I have zero knowledge on.  
> I wasn't kidding when I said I am not technology inclined hahah

Willingly suffocating.

Would be the words I would use to describe what i'm feeling right now. In Tarjei's room. On his bed. Hearing him take a shower in the adjoining bathroom. It's almost overwhelming. Seeing his childhood trophies and awards scattered across his room. Looking at bits and pieces of his life. Having his scent be all around you. I'm trying to refrain myself from burrowing into his blankets. 

I let out a small sigh, I knew what I wanted; what I've always wanted from the moment I met him. But I had no idea what was going on in his mind. I know we needed to talk but for fucks sake i'm in his ROOM. On his king sized BED. How am I supposed to concentrate? 

I hear the water turn off, and I swallow the last of the pizza we had ordered.  
Breathe. You're here to bond. Outside of work. Not jump his bones at every chance you get.

Tarjei walks out wearing nothing but grey sweatpants, riding low enough that the 'V' of his hips are almost mocking me above the waistband of his underwear; and completely shirtless. I trail my eyes over the still glistening abs of his stomach.

Are you fucking kidd-

"Jeez, hungry?" He smirks before grabbing a plain black tshirt from his dresser and pulling it on.

Chuckling. "You abandoned me. I had no choice." I wave my hand over the now empty pizza boxes. 

Tarjei waltzes over and grabs the boxes, placing them on the floor before plopping himself down on his bed, "Good thing I got my slices in before my shower then. I would've starved." He rolls his eyes at me. "So shall I kick your arse again at Fifa or.."

I lean back against his headboard, stretching my long legs out. "Nah, my dignity can only take so much."  
He laughs and a smile spreads across my face. It really is becoming my favourite sound.

"What do you suppose we do then?" He sighs, laying back on his pillows and looking up at me with his emeralds, lashes fluttering.

"Rehearse?" I suggest, wiggling my eyebrows at him, half joking.

Tarjei blushes and looks down at his duvet, "Well obviously at some point tonight yeah...we have to finish what I started against that wall."

Oh fuck me.  
I swallow as my brain bursts into a million words and my mouth tries to keep up.  
Tarjei raises his head to finally meet my eyes, cocking an eyebrow at my lack of speaking.

Shit I need to say something.

"Uh, Why," I clear my throat. "Why hasn't Julie have us do a chemistry test with her?"

He grins. "Ah, that would be because I told her she didn't need to."

This time it was my turn to cock an eyebrow at him. "Oh? How come?"

Tarjei blushes slightly and starts picking at a loose thread on a pillow. "Julie and I have complete trust with each other. Kinda need to with this seasons story." He swallows. "But uh, yeah I've told her that we sortof did our own chemistry test and that she shouldn't worry about it. She will see soon enough." He shrugs. "And she trusts me. Said that your audition was enough to convince her anyway."

I can't hold back anymore. I need to touch him. Reaching out, I card my fingers through his still damp hair. "It was a pretty special moment." I lightly tug on the back of his head and he leans into it, almost purring. "Come here." I whisper, pulling him closer to me.

Tarjei instantly slides closer to me as I scoot down to lay flat on the bed. I move my arm so that its around his back as he places his head on my chest, right over my heart. I'm positive he can hear it beating erractically.  
As soon as we settle, I resume pulling my fingers through his hair, quickly figuring out that it's relaxing him as he lets out a content sigh.

My mind is racing. It's taking all of my self control to not flip him over and kiss and touch and feel him until he's a trembling mess. But something tells me he needs this; this cuddling moment. And i'm more than willing to let him take this at his pace. Whatever he needs, I will give it to him.

"Hey, Henrik?" 

"Hmm?" I tilt my head to look down at his face. 

His eyes flicker to mine before looking away and licking his lips. "What...uh...oh fuck it..What the hell is this?" He laughs while gesturing to the air near us.

There it is. I smile fondly at him. "Is it important to you that you want to label this?"

"Well, no. Not really, I just.." He takes a breath. "I just want to make sure I can kiss and touch you when I want."

My breath gets caught in my throat. "Tarjei, you can always touch and kiss me."

He lets out a breathy laugh before hesitantly reaching up and caressing my cheek. "Always?" He whispers, uncertainty clear in his voice.

Time to lay it all out there, I suppose.  
I cover his hand on my cheek with my free one, intertwining them and placing them on my chest.

"Tarjei, what happened between us during my audtion...I've never felt before. I walked into that room and was automatically drawn to you. It was like you looked at me and I was hooked." I let out a breath. "I couldn't wrap my head around it. And then we did our scene and..." I trail off as I feel him smile. "This connection formed between us, and I knew you had felt it too. It was so strong. I was terrified when I left. I didn't know what to think. How is it possible to have such feelings for someone you just barely met?" I stop playing with his hair and tilt his chin up to meet my eyes. "But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I didn't need to. That whatever is happening between us, is between us. No one else needs to understand it." I brush his cheek with my thumb. "I'm tethered to you Tarjei. I constantly feel the need to be touching you in some way. My emotions whenever I'm near you, are always on edge of bursting."

Tarjei's mouth drops open in surprise before he shuts it. "But...Is..." he shakes his head slightly. "Is this just because of the strong emotions between Isak and Even?"

Oh this boy. 

I smile at him endearingly and place my hand behind his head, holding him steady. "I'm beginning to think that Isak and Even's emotions are only being conveyed because of OUR connection. That what you and I have, is only a baseline for whatever their storyline may be." I beam at him. "Henrik and Tarjei are two separate people, who have a different level of connection than Isak and Even." 

He stares into my eyes as I caress his jaw, waiting for him to speak.

Finally, he smiles, two dimple showing. "So...connection? That's what we're calling this?"

Grinning, I nod. "Natural connection."

"And I can touch you whenever I want?"

Rolling onto my back more, I let out a laugh. "Whenever you want, Tarjei."

I pull him up onto my chest so that he's half lying on top of me, my hand tracing patterns on his back.

"You can...you know, touch me whenever you want to as well." His voice coming out shy.

"Oh I plan on it." I chuckle, marveling at the blush spread across his face. Damn, he is pretty.

We lie there in a few moments of content. Feeling the other breathe.

Tarjei shifts and tilts his head up towards mine. "What about on set...or if we see each other in the street or...like at parties and stuff."

I run my hand through his now fluffy hair. "Then we will act however we feel like. Handshake, hug, tongue, whatever we choose. Because its US."

Tarjei lifts his head. "However we choose?"

Nodding, I smile. "Whenever we're around each other. Always."

He smiles, then slowly closes the gap between us, barely giving me a chance to process what was happening before placing his lips against mine.

I recover quickly, moving my hand to the back of Tarjei's head; grasping his hair as our mouths slowly work against each other. My other hand finding its way down Tarjei's body until it lands on his hip, squeezing gently. Tarjei digs his body closer, his hands grasping on my shoulders; trying to find something to hold onto in this somewhat awkward position. I lick along his bottom lip, instantly being rewarded by a soft sigh as he opens his mouth to let me have access. Stroking his tongue with mine in bold movements, savouring the taste of him. I feel Tarjei's hips subtly move against my side, and that's enough for me to flip us so that he is now beneath me, and I settle between his legs. Tarjei gasps at the change of position and swiftly moves one hand behind my head, and the other on my shoulder, pulling ne down flat so that there was no space between our bodies.  
I can feel the heat intensify. Grasping onto the back of Tarjei's hair, I pull, forcing our mouths apart. He groans as I start to graze my teeth along his jaw, pausing every so often to bite softly before moving his down his neck. Finding the soft pulse, I kiss it gently before biting and sucking harshly until Tarjei bucks underneath me. 

"Fuck!" 

He clutches onto my biceps, nails digging into the skin leaving crescent marks. Tarjei whimpers slightly as my hips involuntary move down against his own, causing just enough friction that I realise just how hard I really am. I remove my mouth from his neck, admiring my work; and I relish in the shudder running through the boy beneath me as I blow air on the maroon mark. 

"Sorry, Julie may get mad over that one." I can't help but smile, gently running my thumb over the hickey before lacing my fingers back through Tarjei's hair.

He grins. "Worth it." He starts rubbing the back of my arm. Staring up at me, as we become lost in the sea of green and blue.

I lean down and press my mouth back against his, moving to find that now familiar pace, before pulling back up. "Hey boyfriend."

Rolling his eyes, Tarjei responds, voice full of affection. "Hey boyfriend." Then he reaches up and touches my lips with his fingertips.

My eyes flutter, his touch igniting. And I move to adjust my weight, and in the process, I accidentally pressed my ever-hardening length against his inner thigh.

Tarjei throws his head back, a quiet moan escaping him. My eyes snap with want at the pale exposed skin of Tarjei's neck.

"Henrik." He breathes.

I feel a tremor run through me and I raise an eyebrow at him. "Sorry, what was that?" I slowly roll up my hips, the movement causing my covered cock to drag along Tarjei's apparent sensitive thigh.

He whines, head thrown back, eyes closed with want. "Please." 

At the tone of his voice, I stop my motions. I need to make sure.

"Tarjei." I place a hand on his cheek, as those green eyes open to meet mine. "What do you want?"

Tarjei raises his hips, trying to get some form of relief, but I lift up more, denying him. 

He huffs out. "You."

Slowly, I lower my head back to that wanting neck; lightly placing my wet mouth down towards Tarjei's collarbones.

"No. what. do. you. want?" I emphasize between kisses. 

I can almost hear it click in Tarjei's mind, and he holds back a loud moan as I latch onto the skin between his neck and his shoulder.

"T-touch me." He whispers.

I tighten my grip hearing his words and he arches his back, his chest grazing against mine.

"Fucking touch me Henrik please."

At that, I quickly reattach our mouths, instantly taking control. And I lower my hips back down, making sure that they're aligned up enough that our cocks are right next to each other; sliding against the other with our movements. Tarjei groans into my mouth, as my hands travel down to the hem of his black t-shirt and start pulling. 

"Off." I mutter. And we break apart; Tarjei sits up and helps rip it off.

His hands start grabbing at mine. "Off. Off now."

I can't help but laugh as I follow suit and Tarjei falls back against the bed.  
Hovering over his body, I allow my eyes to rake in his chest and abs.

"Fuck me.." I murmer as I rub my hand up and down his toned stomach. "You're so beautiful." 

Tarjei blushes and reaches to pull me back down against him. Skin against skin.  
I connect our mouths as I let my hands wander. Feeling every dip in hard muscle on my way down to where they long to be.  
Squeezing his hips as I rest my hands there momentarily.

Tarjei bucks his hips up slightly and I give in to meet his thrusts this time; grinding back down in rhythm with his. I continue to slide my right hand lower and lower before slipping my fingertips into his waistband and snapping it against his skin. He lets another whine, making me pull away to look down at his face. I want to see every emotion cross it.  
Gliding my hand over Tarjei's sweatpants, brushing against his straining cock. Back and forth until I feel a wet spot.  
I smirk at him

"Mmm, so eager.." I groan out.

Tarjei is panting, one hand holding onto my wrist on his waist, the other grasping at the blanket. "Don't...don't tease me."

I shake my head, "Never. Don't worry, I'll take care of you."

In one swift movement, I push down Tarjei's sweatpants and underwear, leaving it to bunch at his knees. The action causing his glistening, red cock to slap against his stomach, releasing a louder moan from the boy.

I can't help but stare. He's just so fucking attractive. I almost want to slap myself to make sure that this was real, that Tarjei was here, naked, underneath me.  
Deciding I wanted a better view, I move so that I'm now lying on my side next to him, with him still on his back.  
Palming lightly over the head his cock, Tarjei suddenly thrusts up to meet it, throwing his head back and letting out a gasp. 

I groan at the sight and turn my head to watch his reaction as I finally take complete hold of his wanting cock.

Tarjei's chest is heaving, I could almost see his heartbeat racing.

Slowly I brush my thumb to collect the wetness from the tip and rub it down, keeping my touch light.  
Once I feel it covered enough to slide with comfort, I begin to move my hand up and down, agonizingly slow. Gently pulling the skin on the downstroke. My gaze locked to Tarjei's face.

"Oh fuck." Tarjei bites his bottom lip.

"Shit." I groan out and pick up speed. I tear my eyes away from his face to look down at his cock in my mind. God he feels so fucking good.  
I tighten my grip and move my hand even faster, snapping my head back up to his face.

Tarjei opens his eyes and connects his eyes with mine. "Oh god." He gasps out.

I readjust my grip and twist my hand, causing the skin around his tip to be tugged.

His eyes shut and he throws his hand up to hold onto his headboard tightly. "Ah! AH! FUCK!" 

I can't look away. Tarjei looks so beautiful like this. Chest rising and falling, lips red from being kissed and bitten. The flush of his skin was spread out from his face to his stomach. And the noises. Fuck. The noises coming out of his mouth is hotter than I could've ever imagined. I could come from this alone.

I feel my cock straining against my tight jeans.  
I move my body so that my hips are lying on the bed, and keeping up with the rhythm of my hand, I start grinding down. Rutting my hips against the bed, feeling the sweet friction it's bringing.

"H-Henrik." Tarjei stutters out. "I'm..I'm close."

At his words, I pick up the pace, this time squeezing slightly on the upstroke. The change causes Tarjei's mouth to drop open and release the loudest moan yet. 

"Fuck T." I sigh out; his sounds goes straight to my cock and I start thrusting even faster, trying to chase my own very close release.

"Cmon. Cmon baby." My voice comes out low with lust. "Come for me."

Tarjei's hips suddenly start jerking up irratically and he arches off the bed. His moans constantly flowing out of his mouth. His hand holding onto the headboard turning white at the knuckles; the other balled up in the blankets as he hits his peak.

He shouts out as come shoots across his stomach, painting him in the most beautiful way.  
I keep my hand on him as I follow immediately and release a moan of my own, wetness spreading all over my jeans. Fuck.

I continue to stroke him through it, easing him out of his orgasm until his breath starts to return to normal; his pants coming out as he comes down from his high.

"What...the fuck." Tarjei turns his head and looks at me, giggling. "That was.." He flops his arm from holding onto his headboard, back to the bed.

"Incredible." I finish. "You're so fucking hot Tarjei." I reluctantly let go of his now soft cock. Moving to get off of the bed, "Lemme grab a cloth and clean you up." I go into the bathroom and quickly return with a damp washcloth. 

Tarjei is still laying on his bed, trying to steady his breathing; watching me clean him up with a small smile. "Let me catch my breath and I'll return the favour."

I wink at him. "No need."

He tilts his head at me. "Why?"

"I uh...I came right before you did." I gesture to my jeans, where the obvious stains are showing.

Tarjei licks his lips and smirks. "Hmm." He raises his eyebrows at me. 

I smack the side of his thigh. "Hey now, don't get too full of yourself. It's just the noises you make are better than any porn I've ever watched."

Tarjei laughs out loud with that, sitting up and pulling up his underwear and sweatpants. "Well let me grab you some clean things to wear." He gets off the bed and pads over to his dresser, pulling out sweats and tossing them to me as I make my way into his bathroom.

When I come back out, Tarjei has turned his lights off and turned on the bedside lamp. Laying on his bed, he pats the spot next to him. I cross the room and slide in beside him. Placing my arm around him and pull his head up to my shoulder, curving my arm around to play with his hair. 

"Are you...are you going to stay?" He asks in a quiet voice.

I smile down at him. "Would you like me to?"

He nods.

I kiss his forehead. "Then i'll stay."

Tarjei raises his head up towards mine. I grin, knowing what he wants before placing my lips against his in a tender short kiss.

"Go to sleep." I murmer.

He sighs and settles back into the crook of my shoulder.

"Hey boyfriend" He whispers.

"Hmm?"

"I'm glad you came and auditioned for Skam."

"Me too."


	5. The Talk Show Host: Tarjei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi  
> sorry again that this was late. I've been busy and skam is ruining me in the best ways. Per usual.  
> Thank you to all those reading. I'm excited to see your reactions as the story moves along.  
> next chapter will be posted tomorrow or the day after. depending on if we get that Even clip haha
> 
> I'm snapbackskam on twitter if you have questions or wanna say hi 
> 
> but also: do you guys want me to put chapter summaries? or just be surprised? let me know in comments or whatever. Thank you:)  
> ps: THANK YOU JJ

They say that a habit or a routine takes 30 days before it sets in.

Ours took 1.

Since that first night Henrik spent with me; we haven't let the other sleep alone.

It started the day after our first night, when he sent me a text during the day; simply asking; "mine or yours tonight?" 

Its been 5 consistant nights.

Logically we probably should spend time away from each other. And actually we do.  
This week, I was busy filming scenes he wasn't in, and he was busy working at the coffee shop.  
I didn't see him until the evenings; when either he would come to mine or I to his. And honestly, we mostly just sleep. We curl up in either his or my bed and talk about our day. Or an upcoming scene together; throwing idea's back and forth. My head on his chest as he traces patterns across my back. I mean of course, our hands stray. You try to not get hard when one of Henriks massive hands starts caressing your thigh.  
It's only been our hands though. Hands and hidden hickeys. (Since Julie flipped her shit when she saw that one on my neck.) We never feel the need to rush; to push. Whatever happens, happens. 

Today though, I get to watch Henrik cross the school yard, going full Romeo.  
and all I can I think about, is replacing my hand with my mouth. 

He just looks so fucking good. Serena has him in this navy blue jacket and styled his hair so that gravity itself couldn't tear it down. When he was all dressed, he had asked me if he thought I looked alright. 

I couldn't even form words. I practically salivated in front of him. From the glasses hanging on his shirt, to the cigarette behind his ear; he just emulated "cool". So Even. I could only nod and opened my mouth to speak before someone from makeup whisked him away.

And now here I am, fiddling with my snapback as Ulrikke is telling me a story about something her and Ina did over the weekend. I'm trying to focus on her words but my eyes keep straying to Henrik, who is chatting with Anthony, our steadycam handler, and laughing. As if he sensed my eyes, Henrik looks back at me and winks before returning his attention to Anthony.

I feel my face burn and I quickly look down.

_Get a hold of yourself. Don't think about taking him apart by just using your tongue, watching him moan as your mouth- ___

__

__

"-and then Ina had to pick it all up and try to build it all over again! So so funny! Too bad you couldn't make it! Why couldn't you again?" Ulrikke's excited voice fell back onto me, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"Uh. What? OH! Yeah sorry I didn't come. Heard it was fun." I shrug at her, hopeful that my answer will deter her question.

She smiles wider, if that's possible. "It was! You must come next time! Why didn't you?"

Clearly she's not letting this go.

I half smile. "I was tired and wanted to catch up on sleep. And also go over lines and...stuff." Well, that's not all lies.

"OH! Oh yeah!" Ulrikke turns and glances at Henrik before turning back to me. "I heard you and Henrik hang out a lot now. Getting close. That's so good! So good for Isak!"

I raise my eyebrow, wondering how to respond when, thankfully, I'm saved by the presence of Julie.

"Ullie, Serena wants to do something different with your hair. Head over there and then we'll set up the shot." Julie nods in that direction and Ulrikke waves then rushes off.

I close my eyes, trying to get into my zone; finding Isak to pull him out.

"Are you Isak or Tarjei right now?"

My eyes rip open at the sound of Julie's voice. I thought she had followed Ulrikke. "What?"

Julie smirks. "I saw you checking out Henrik, getting flustered when he so much as looked at you. So I'm asking, is this Isak or is this Tarjei?"

Scoffing, I place the grey snapback on my head and then let out a breath. "Does it matter?"

"No. I suppose not... I actually was going to say use it. Use and bring whatever is happening between you and him into your work but," she waves her hand. "You two clearly already are." She squints at me slightly. "Just be careful there. Watch your dick Valtersen Moe." 

I roll my eyes at her words but laugh as she walks away yelling. "ALRIGHT PLACES TO SET UP THE FIRST SHOT!"

I adjust my snapback and lean down to grab Isaks leather backpack; smiling to myself as I put it on.

_Valtersen Moe. Fuck off Julie. ___

____

____

I get in position, standing about 15 steps behind Ulrikke, before I shut my eyes briefly. Isak. Isak is trying to get the chance to see Even again. Trying to be subtle about this.

I let out another breath and my eyes open to look for him automatically. I find him crouched behind one of the wide lens cameras, next to the bushes; smoking. His eyes focused on nothing but the concentration on his face is sure. He's getting into his headspace. He blows out a puff of smoke and I feel my cock twitch. Why is that so hot?

Fuck. I'm about to be filmed I can't have a hard on. 

I force my eyes away. Making myself concentrate. Readjusting my snapback. 

__Focus. Bring that want into Isak.__

__And so I do._ _

____

__

____

\---

"You looked hot today." The words are out of my mouth before I know it.

Henrik pauses in taking off his hoodie, looking slightly taken aback, before smiling, "Thank you. All the magic of a film set." He pulls the hoodie over his head and tosses it into a corner of his room.

After filming his part today, Henrik had to hurry off for his shift at KB. Then when I was done, I had spent the day with my friends before getting that now expected text from him, asking me to meet him at his flat. This is the first time I've properly spoken to him today.

I chuckle. "Yeah yeah something like that." I open my bag and pull out my sweats. "Do you mind if I go change in the bathroom?"

Henrik lets out a laugh. "6 nights later and you still wont change in front of me. Not like I haven't seen you shirtless T." His face softens into a smile. "I'm joking, of course you can. Whatever you need to do."

Before he could see my face, I rush into his bathroom across the hall. Seriously, my blushing is irritating me. Its pretty much all the time now. I let out a sigh as I look into the mirror over the sink. Why do I get so nervous around him? So shy..so damn bashful. This hasn't happened with anyone else I've been with.

I grin. Natural connection. I can almost hear Henriks voice saying it.

Overthinking once again. I need to just stop. Stop thinking. Stop worrying. That's what we talked about last week. Time to start doing. Doing what I want. Because i'm here. With him.

Because I can.  
Because he'll let me.

I pull off my trousers and shirt before leaving the bathroom in only my boxers. Opening the door to his room, I find that Henrik's already turned the light off; window wide open across the room. The moon shining bright enough that I can see the room well enough. See that he's laying on his bed, in nothing but basketball shorts; shirtless.

He looks over at me as I shut the door. "About time-" His words stop as he see's me. His mouth dropping; eyes racking up and down my body.

I feel the heat rise onto my face and chest as I walk towards the bed, steadying my breathing.

Slowly, I kneel onto the bed, inching my way closer to him.

Henrik recovers and sits up, reaching out to me. He pulls me onto his lap, my legs falling onto the side of his thighs; straddling him. "Hey boyfriend."

I let out a content sigh as his hands start lightly tracing up my back before coming up to cup my jaw. "Hey boyfriend." I whisper as his thumb strokes my bottom lip.

__He smiles and leans in, touching our noses before tilting to connect our lips in the softest kiss._ _

____

____

I revel in the moment. This is nice. But this isn't what I want. Anticipation starts growing in my stomach.

I need more.

I crash my mouth back onto Henriks, instantly opening up his mouth with my tongue. My hands grip onto Henriks shoulders tightly, and he groans into my mouth as he surrenders, willingly losing the fight for control. Good  
I bring my hands to his chest and gently push. Henrik gets the message and falls onto his back. I follow eagerly, never separating our mouths. Henrik spreads his legs a little wider and I adjust my legs so that our groins are lined up. I slowly grind down, lightly catching the side of Henriks cock with my own before sliding it against his inner thigh. Henrik breaks his mouth away and moans, biting his lip as I bring my hip back down, this time fully grinding my cock against his.

"Oh fuck." Henrik mutters out.

I remove my lips to nip at the skin on his neck; working my way to his collarbone where I stop to leave a delicate bruise. Henrik panting breaths hit my face as I feel him grip onto my arms. I continue to work the spot over and over with my teeth.  
Once satisfied, I pad over it with my tongue before lowering down; pausing to graze my lips over his nipple. I lick my tongue over it and marvel at watching it perk. Fuck, the way his body responds to me is making my own cock twitch.  
Sticking my tongue back out, I flick over his nipple, again and again. 

"oh my god.." Henrik chokes out. 

I smirk before biting down, hard. 

"FUCK TARJEI!" Henrik shouts out as he slightly arches against my mouth.

Giggling, I release him. "Sorry.."

I trail my lips back down, over the planes of Henriks smooth stomach. My hands following, caressing every inch of skin of his they touch. Finally, I get down to his sweatpants line.  
"Can I...?" I whisper, placing a kiss at the skin above the band, before raising my eyes to look up at him. 

Henrik stares down at me, clearly trying to control his breathing. "Please, God yes." He groans out.

I grin and softly bite his lower abs before hooking my fingers into the waistband and pulling; moving my body down so that I can fully take them off of Henriks legs.  
I toss them to the floor and lay down to get my head level with his straining cock. I bring a hand up and palm him through the cloth of his briefs, rubbing the head before sliding my hand back down the length.

Henrik throws his head back, moaning almost in exasperation. "Fuck...."

I hide my smirk, I'm loving being in control. Being the reason he's trembling.  
I decide to be merciful and I quickly move to push down his briefs and having them join the rest of his clothes on the floor.

As soon as Henrik's cock is free, I can't help but stare.  
Sure, I've seen it a few times, but not this close. Its just so big. So fucking thick.

I wet my lips with want and dive in to lick a bold stroke up the shaft, then a quick one in the slit on the head.

Henrik could barely contain a whimper, moving his hips up and causing his cock to slap against his stomach, groans pouring out of his mouth.

Placing my mouth back on the head, I swipe through the slit again and pull off.

"Please." Henrik whines. "Tarjei.."

"Shh baby.." I hush.

I grin again. This will be fun.  
I take a breath and wrap my mouth the head, swiftly sliding down and sucking hard on the way back up.

This time Henrik's hips fully come off of the bed. "AH FUCK!" He moans loudly

I hold his hips down with my hands and continue to work my mouth up and down his shaft, flicking my tongue in circle around the head every other time I come up.

Hearing a rustle, I glance up to see Henrik reach behind him to grasp onto his headboard, the other one I feel him bury into my hair.  
He curls his hand tightly into the top of my head, pulling, and the tug releases a deep groan out of me.

I see Henrik toss his head back; my sounds vibrating my throat that i'm sure he he feels on his cock.  
I pick up speed, tightening my lips around his cock.

"Fuck...fuck. T..I'm-" Henrik lets out a loud moan. "I'm close." 

I close my eyes and lose myself in the feeling, in the noises. My body starts doing figure eights against the mattress, trying to find relief

"Oh my god." I hear Henrik whisper. "Lookit you."

I open my eyes instantly to find his gaze locked with mine. His thick mouth open and he wets his lips with his tongue.  
The sight makes me moan as I keep working my mouth, up and down, up and down. 

This is what I've been wanting to do all damn day. To wat Henrik slowly unravel under my mouth. To have me bring him to his edge with only my tongue.

I halt my movements at the head and I slightly pull off. I stick my tongue out and twirl it around in circles on the sensitive skin; catching the slit with my tongue.  
Henrik writhes under me, pants and groans and nonsensical whispers flowing out of his mouth.

I pull my mouth all the way off, and just as I hear Henrik let out a frustrated grunt, I place my mouth back on and slide all the way down until I feel him hit the back of my throat.

"FUCK!" Henrik yells out and his hips thrust up, the tip hitting the warm heat, reveling in the wet heat. 

I hold him there and hum around him, knowing that the sensation would almost be overwhelming. My own hips picking up the pace of their movements.  
I pull all the way off of him again before taking him deep, over and over.

"T. I'm...i'm gonna-" Henrik tries to stutter out. I can feel his body heaving.

I let out a loud moan, stopping my motions for a moment as I feel my own hips jerk against the bed. Hitting my ecstasy, filling my trouser with my own come. But keeping my mouth around his length. 

"Oh GOD. That was so fucking hot! Tarjei I'm gonna-" 

I feel his load shoot into my mouth, the bitterness coating my throat.  
I swallows every last drop before pulling off, licking my lips.

Henrik moans and I see him bring his hands to his face. "Holy shit."

I wipe the back of my hand across my mouth, trying to contain my smirk. "Yeah?" I scoot off of the bed and uncomfortably walk to my bag, where I pull out and extra pair of boxers. "You going to be alright?" I look over at him, still unmoving on the bed.

"You're going to be the death of me probably." came the muffled voice against his hands.

I laugh. "Hold on, be right back." I hurry out of his room and into the bathroom to clean myself up and put on the fresh clothes. When I reenter, Henrik has moved up more to lean against the headboard, head turned toward me.

He pats the spot next to him. "Get the fuck back over here."

Grinning, I climb back onto the bed. Henrik reaches out and pulls me against him, pressing his mouth against mine in a sweet kiss before I bury my head in the krook of his shoulder. He lets out a sigh as his hand starts tracing along the skin of my back.

We're silent for a moment. Both of us content in the aftermath. 

I cant contain my growing smile. How lucky am I to be in this position. To have found someone who just GETS it. Understands how I'm feeling, and who reciprocates it. Then the worry washes over me, the wonder of how long we will get to have this, and does Henrik ever want it to end. But I push it down. I won't let myself bring myself down in this moment. I let out a silent sigh through my nose.

Henrik must've felt it against his neck. "You aright?" He shifts his head to look down at me.

Smiling, I nod. "I'm fine. Just tired. and tomorrow is a big day."

"It is. A big moment for Isak and Even." Henrik pulls me closer, resting his cheek against my hair. "And I have to kiss Theresa in front of you." I hear the smile in his voice.

"Fuck off." I huff out with a laugh. Then I raise my head, locking eyes with him. "Honestly though, tomorrow is a pivotal moment. Its the scene where Isak starts to fall in love with Even."

Henrik smiles and runs a hand through my hair. "On the windowsill?"

"On the windowsill."

"Why do you think that's where?" Henrik moves his hand to brush against my cheek.

I lean into his touch. "Isak lets all of his guards down. All the walls he has built up start to crumble. Even initiates that. He is starting to bring out the real Isak. and Isak lets him." I shrug. "I just knew when I read the script, that that was the moment where Isak starts to allow himself to want something. To want someone who he actually has feelings for."

Henrik slides his hand to the back of my neck and pulls me towards him. My lips part in anticipation as our mouths connect. He holds me there, letting us just feel, before releasing me. Pressing his forehead against mine. 

"The way you bring Isak to life, is so beautiful to watch. I can't believe how lucky I am to be partnered up with you." Henrik leans away slightly, chasing my eyes with his.

This time I close the gap, pressing my lips against his before pulling away. "But its you, its Even, who brings him to his real life."

Henrik opens his mouth, but closes it; choosing instead to pull me close to him. He lays us back on the bed, resuming our original spots. I feel him move and kiss my forehead. I smile and press my lips against his neck before sighing. We fall back to silence. Just the sound of our breathing fills the room. And we fall asleep. Both lost in the thoughts of this love story we're creating.


	6. The Party: Henrik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a broken record, but sorry that this is late! With Evens clip/his movie for isak/skam fest/skam ending/my life is over  
> happening...I got distracted. BUT I've gotten some really good ideas to add to this story. I'm excited.
> 
> I just want to get this story out of my brain so that those of you read this can enjoy it. :)
> 
> OH, again: I AM NOT ASSUMING ANYONE"S SEXUALITY IN THIS FIC. just a reminder, this is my own fiction story.
> 
> anyways. thanks for being so kind. xx

"Its impractical."

"Shut up."

I laugh. "No really dude, a TOP BUNK loft bed? What were you thinking?"

Marlon rolls his eyes at me. "Fuck off, it makes it so that there's more space in my room." He waves his hand around.

Raising my eyebrow at him, I glance around the busy room; taking note of crew setting up the cameras and light fixtures. "Mhmm. More space."

"Well, I meant when there's not a dozen people in here filming some damn tv show."

I smirk at him. "Bro, cmon. How are you supposed to even fuck on that?"

"Fuck off. Its the thrill of the climb that gets the girls going." Marlon says so seriously that I burst into laughter.

"I fucking bet it is!" 

Marlon grins at me before bending closer and lowering his voice. "Now, did you want me to switch out the weed before Julie kicks me out of my own room?"

"Normally, I would say yes but this is kind of a pivotal scene and I want to make sure I'm focused." I take in the room before finding him standing by the window, snapback in his hands, staring at nothing. I could feel his anxiety from where I stood. "But maybe ask Mr. Moe over there." I nod in his direction.

Marlon winks at me before sauntering over to where Tarjei stood. I see him lean near his ear and whisper before Tarjei grins at him and shakes his head. A smile forms on my face as Tarjei lets out a laugh at something Marlon must've said. 

Oh this boy... I know this scene has been weighing on his mind more than he lets on. He vocalized them to me last night but, I guess I didn't realise it enough. As soon as I came onset today, he had come over and smiled at me. Not saying one word, he entertwined our hands before lifting it up to his lips. After placing the softest kiss, all he said was "No kissing today." winked, dropped my hand and walked over to Julie.  
It had almost shocked me. He's never been..well, distant with me before. I felt like I had done something wrong. That perhaps I should've slowed us down. Maybe I should've stopped him last night.

After I was done with wardrobe, I debated going over to him. To get into the mindset with each other like how we've been doing since filming. But then Marlon appeared by me, as if sensing my distress. And had calmly said. "You know, Tj is a different league of us all. He feels a bit more than we do." And those words snapped me out of it.  
This scene is critical to Isak, so in turn that puts the pressure on Tarjei to perfect it. He is dealing with it in the way he knows, in what works. And he will nail it.

And I will give him everything I have to help get him there during this scene.

I watch Marlon punch Tarjei's shoulder and walk off. "Don't touch my antique loft bed!" He shouts to everyone before smiling at us all and leaving the room.

"Trying to change out the kush?"

I half turn to see Julie standing by me, fidgeting with a camera. "That's what he did when we filmed the first clip. These boys think I don't know what real weed smells like? Please."

Laughing, I nudge her with my elbow. "He did but I figure this scene is sortof important. I should be clear... also I don't want to get fired."

Julie glances up at me. "Pssh, I couldn't fire you. Tarjei would murder me. and that would be script kamikaze." 

"Talking about me again Julie? Jeez, obsessed much?"

We turn around and see Tarjei standing behind us, snapback on his curls, blue jacket on with the backpack. I smile as I take him in. Hello Isak.

Julie rolls her eyes at him, "You're my main this season, its my damn job to eat, drink, and breathe you."

Tarjei grins. "That's weird."

"I know. Welcome to my world." She finally snaps the lens on the camera and looks between us. "Alright, i'm going to go mount this and then we'll start. You both ready?"

I glance at Tarjei and he winks at me. "Yup" Julie nods at us and walks off.

Turning myself so that i'm fully facing Tarjei, I slowly reach out and place my hand behind his neck, caressing his jaw with my thumb. "You alright?"

Tarjei leans into my touch as his eyes flutter closed for a moment before the green reappear. "Yeah. I always..." Trailing off, he closes his mouth and clears his throat. "I just want to get started." Half smiling at me before looking down, adjusting his backpack straps.

I slide my hand over his shoulder and down his arm before dropping back to my side. I knew he was going to say something else but I decide not to push it. He'll tell me when he wants to. 

"Hey." 

Tarjei looks back up, finally meeting my eyes. "Mm?"

"You look hot today."

Red floods his cheeks as I smile at him. His gaze drops once more and I hear his faint mutter of a thank you before Julie's voice rings out.

"Lets go lets go. Starting positions."

I take in a breath before walking to the door way. _You've got him here Even, can't go back now._

 

\---

Theresa.  
He's upset about Theresa.  
Or I suppose, about the fact that I shoved my tongue down her throat in front of him.

The day had been great..well, amazing actually. Tarjei gave me such a challenge to act against. The banter was real between us. The laugher. Isak and Even were getting to know each other. I had mentioned to Julie that I liked to think Even had been slightly stalking Isak for a couple of weeks before Kosegruppa. So Even was finally able to be alone with his crush. Isak let his guard down slightly and the flirting just came naturally. The energy Tarjei radiated absolutely fueled me. We were in sync. Whatever the other threw, the other went with it.

That was until Theresa showed up right during our Ebox scene on the floor. She's an old friend of mine, and I hadn't seen her in a while so during light fixture changes; she and I got chatting. And when the scene for me to introduce her to Isak came, I could feel how thick his jealousy came off. At the time I chalked it up to the scene...and I knew he would probably just roll his eyes over her and I kissing, as its part of the script. But after our last shot, I went over to him to ask if he was staying at mine tonight. And what I got was a huff and a line about him going to some party before he was out the door.

Now putting the last couple of hours together in my head, I'm almost annoyed.  
First off, its Theresa, an old friend of mine. Who, during our catching up, was telling me about her new girlfriend.  
Secondly, its in the damn script for me to kiss her and Tarjei knew that. Was he really that jealous? I just assumed he was Isak during it. Sure, I bet Tarjei wouldve not liked to see that but...I didn't think he'd react like THIS. He can't seriously be mad at me about it.

I pull out my phone and start typing.

**Hey. You left set pretty quickly earlier. I was just wondering if you wanted to come to mine tonight.. Or if me coming to yours was easier.**

The bubbles pop up and go away 3 times before his answer comes through.

_Tarjei: Dunno. I'm going to a party with my friends. I'll probably stay at one of theirs or something._

"Oh fuck off." I murmer to myself as I drop my phone next to me on my bed. I lay back on the duvet and rub my hands over my eyes, sighing. Why am I even letting this bother me? Its time's like this that I remember that he's 17. If he wants to act like this, then fine.  
I sit up and grab my phone again, opening up a chat with my mate Alex.

**Hey man, any parties tonight? I need to get out of my flat.**

Going back to Tarjei's chat, I type:

**K**

Alex's response come through.

_Alex: Hell yes Henks is coming OUT TONIGHT! I hear there's this Bakka second year throwing one. Shall we go?_

Bakka. Good, Tarjei probably won't be at this one. 

**Perfect. I'll swing by your place on the way.**

Perhaps we just got too used to being around each other. Maybe it would be good to have a night where we both live our own lives. We don't have to always be with each other. I've only known him for about 3 weeks now. I had a life before him. I had a social life. Our connection shouldn't change that. Right? I nod to myself before standing up and heading to the bathroom to shower and get ready. He never texted back.

\---

We'd been there about 45 minutes before I saw him.

He was tucked away in a corner of the main room, surrounded by his group of friends, throwing back a Tuborg with clear intent to get drunk.  
I wasn't sure how long he had been there, and if he knew I was here; doubt that he did.

The party wasn't too crazy, just a lot of bodies and loud music. I discovered I knew a lot of people when I arrived. Old friends from school and theatre days.  
I wondered how he came to be there, and how ironic the situation was. My annoyance almost rose again. Of course he would be at the same party. I glanced over at him again as I see him laugh at something one of his friends must've said. Shit. He looks good. Wearing a grey tshirt with a red buttoned up shirt over it with the sleeves rolled to his forearms. His slight curls carefully styled. It's almost not fair.

I watch him finish what i'm positive wasn't his first beer, then see him immediately crack open another one.

Okay, he needs to cool it or drink some water. Time to get him to notice me cos fuck all if i'm going to approach him first.

I angle myself so that i'm in his direct eye line if he looks straight ahead. Thank God I'm tall and that I chose to wear a white shirt; i'm positive its helping me stand out a bit more.  
Lara, a girl I know from school, has been chatting with me for a bit. I decide to tune into what she was saying, focusing on her words.

"And remember when Ms. Leyton threw that paintbrush and it stuck to the ceiling?" Lara was saying.

I stand up a bit taller, and make myself laugh with my whole body, trying to be as big as I can. "Yeah! And she kept it up there the rest of the school year! So damn funny."

I lift my drink to my lips and make a show of drinking it; leaning my head back so that my neck is more exposed as my adams apple jerks with my movements. It seems to have at least an affect on Lara, as I notice her falter over her words and stare at me. Not the attention I want. I shift my eyes to see him out of my prepherals; only to find him engaged in a conversation with this girl standing next to him. The slight roar stirs inside me.

_chill, just chill. You know what your relationship with him is. He's free to do what he wishes. You don't own him._

I let out a breath. Fine, If he wants to get drunk and hit on girls. That's fine. Not my concern. I'm here to enjoy my night. Not be worried about him, I need to let him do his own thing.  
Plus, he's the one who should be coming to you.  
I raise the bottle again and finish it off within 2 gulps before giving Lara my attention.

"Wanna go dance?" 

She nods quickly, surprise flooding her face as I grab her hand and lead her more into the dense moving crowd.

Lara was pretty. Beautiful even, with her long blonde hair and blue eyes. And normally, I would've made it my mission to make sure she ended up coming home with me.  
But tonight...tonight I just wanted to have a good time. Let loose and enjoy myself. Not worry about bagging someone to bring home. Just enjoy this party, flirt with who I want, and get a nice buzz before going home and passing out.  
I lead Lara over to where my friends were grouped together, dancing. I pull her in front of me and we start moving to the music. All of us jumping and bumping and grinding up on each other as the drinks flow and the beat sounds.

I had almost forgotten that he was at the party. Almost.

Lara moved closer to me, draping her arms around my neck as she presses her arse against my front, keeping our moving hips connected; my chest pressed against her back as her head leaned against my shoulder. I knew it would be a matter of moments before she tilted her head up to kiss me. And I wouldn't stop her if she did. Maybe I will end up taking her home after all.  
Just as she started moving her head towards mine; I felt his eyes.  
And it was like time slowed down.  
I knew he was looking at me, I could feel it rush through my entire body.  
Snapping my head up and looking directly forward; I see him.

I connect with those emeralds and the world stops for this brief moment. We just stare. Taking in the other. Many words passing between our eyes.  
His face is almost in shock. I assume from the fact that he too, wasn't planning on seeing me here. His eyes quickly dart around me and I realise he's taking in my compromising position with Lara. And before I even have time to process that, he lowers his gaze and turns around; heading towards what looks like a hallway.

The world starts back up and I step away from Lara, my eyes not leaving the spot where Tarjei disappeared too. "Sorry, I'll be right back." I quickly make my way through the pulsing crowd and turn into that hallway.  
There were several shut doors and a couple making out against a part of the wall. But then I see him, leaning against the farthest closed door; chugging his Tuborg. I slowly walk up until I'm standing in front of him; his eyes cast down.

"Well, fancy meeting you here."

Tarjei's head snaps up and I meet his bloodshot eyes. "Did you kno-know I was going to be here?" He hiccups.

I cock my head at him. "No? This was just a party one of my friends knew of."

"Oh." Tarjei tilts his head back and gulps his beer.

"Okay yeah lets go get you some water." I gently grab the beer out of his hand with surprisingly no resistance from him.

"This is a bathroom."

"What?"

Tarjei knocks his head against the door he is leaning against. "This is bathroom." He sighs. "I was coming to get water. Kitchen too crowded."

I hold in a chuckle at the way he's acting all pouty. Drunk Tarjei has potential to be adorable. "I see, well lets grab you some then." I lean in around him to grasp onto the handle and hear a slight gasp.

"You okay?" I ask him as I open the door behind him.

That red flush spreads across his face as he clears his throat "Yeah. Uh thanks."

I stand in the doorway and watch as he turns the faucet on to splash his face with the cold water and fill up a plastic cup.

My annoyance from earlier today has shifted back to that now familiar fondness. I almost laugh at my ridiculousness that I can't even stay irritated with him. This connection is making that damn near impossible. 

Tarjei looks up and meets my eyes in the mirror. Instantly the air shifts. Electricity courses through my veins. Whatever excitement I may have felt dancing with Lara just became insignificant and non existent with just one look from this boy.  
I gulp and set his empty beer can on the bathroom countertop, taking a slight step into the room. I know that there are things we probably should talk about. I know that I should be annoyed with his lack of maturity from set earlier. I know that I should be stronger than this.

But right now I don't care about any of that. I just want him.

Tarjei turns and faces me; moving so that we're only centimetres apart. His green eyes a little bit more clear than from a few minutes ago. My eyes roam across his face; taking in his perfect cupid bow lips, to those cheekbones. God, he's so beautiful.  
I smile and reach out to card my hand through his hair to pull him to me when he speaks.

"So you clearly were having fun out there." His voice rigid.

My hand drops instantly and I pull slightly back. Seriously? He wants to do this now? I resist rolling my eyes. Way to kill the moment.

Taking a steadying breath, I give him an answer. "I enjoy parties, sure."

"Mmm. Obviously." 

Its there. I can hear it behind his teeth.

I raise my eyebrows at him, deciding to bring it out between us. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Tarjei scoffs, "Nothing."

"No no. What is it? You've been putting me off all day, so tell me now; what do you mean?" I stand up a little straighter, placing one hand on my hip, the other against the counter.

"Just..just forget it. Forget I said anything." He falters.

This time a laugh escapes me. "Try again. You've been bitchy with me all day. Lets have it."

Finally, I broke through.

Tarjei's mouth drops and then he closes it quickly in growing anger. "I've been bitchy? The fuck you on?"

I throw up a hand in exasperation. "After filming today you barely even said a word to me and then you were short in your texts. What am I supposed to think? Why are you upset with me?"

"I'm not upset with you!"

"Then what?" I almost feel bad for pushing him, but he needs to say this outloud. The words are getting so close to be said; I want them to be said.

"I just..I just-" He's floundering.

"Tarjei, what?!"

"I just didn't expect to feel like that!" He huffs out, face turning red.

I run a hand through my hair. "Feel like what?"

This time Tarjei looks down, fiddling with his rolled sleeves. "I got..." He lets out a breath. "I got jealous okay? And then I got angry with myself for being jealous." He wets his lips. "I didn't think it would affect me like it did."

"Its in the script Tarjei." I sigh, relieved that he finally admitted it.

Tarjei looks up and rolls his eyes. "I KNOW it's in the fucking script Henrik. I know that. I just wasn't...I wasn't prepared to see it I guess."

I move closer to him but he stops me by taking a step back. "Then I come here to just chill and forget it, cos really, it doesn't fucking matter." His eyes snap to mine. "Only to see you on the fucking dancefloor with a girl draped all over you." He shrugs. "Not my best day." 

I stare at him for a moment. He's so young, letting these lesser emotions rule him. I should be feeling agitated beyond belief. But I don't. I almost want to laugh. I knew he was jealous and having him say it out loud was gratifying. But now I just feel...special. That this boy got THIS upset over me kissing because of a script, and dancing with a forgetful face.  
I remember Marlon's words. 'Tarjei feels a bit more than we do.' and suddenly my hands feel shaky and butterflies hit my stomach.

Tarjei clears his throat. "Look...Henrik, I'm sorry. I overreacted and it was stupid. I know you have to kiss her for the show. and.." He swallows and moves his gaze to the countertop. "I know I don't have a say in what you do in your life-"

"You do though."

His head quickly pulls up and his eyes search my face. "What?"

I smile at him before I reach out and pull him to my chest. Reveling in us finally touching, I bury my face in his hair and breathe. The growing butterflies in my stomach release as comfort hits me. I'll never get used to this feeling I have when i'm with him, and I hope I never do.

"Tarjei." I pull back, but I move my hands under his jaw, forcing him to look at me. "I know that things like this matter to you; that you need to know the borders and lines. So let me lay one down." I gently rub my thumb against his cheek. "We have something incredible between us. And I cherish it, I cherish every moment of it. When we're near each other, or with each other; that's all that matters. You and I."

Tarjei half smiles at me, only one precious dimple showing. "And when we're not around each other?" His voice small.

My grin softens. "Then..to me..I still will only be thinking about you. And how I can't wait to see you and touch you. To hear your voice and see your smile." I move my hand to hold onto the hair curling around his neck. "How do you not understand that you don't leave my mind?" I whisper.

At those words, Tarjei surges forward, connecting our mouths in an open mouth kiss that had me gasping. His tongue quickly controlling my own, his lips sliding against mine. His hands find their way into my hair and he pulls. I groan into his mouth and I turn him to back him into counter, almost shoving him against it. His breath hitches as his back hits the edge and I swallow his moans. My hands move from his neck down to his waist, pulling him flush against me. Tarjei presses his hips against mine and I detach our mouths to trail down his jaw. Biting, licking, I just want to get lower. I need to feel his cock gliding against my-

"OH holy shit! You weren't joking!"

My eyes pop open as I feel Tarjei's hands push against my chest. Stepping away from him, I spin to see David and a couple of other boys standing in the door way. All of them with growing amusement on their faces.

"What the fuck David?" Tarjei snaps, straightening out his shirt.

I glance at him and realise that he's pulled the tail of his shirt over a slight bulge. I smirk at the thought that I caused that...before I realise that I have the same predicament. I fidget to bring my shirt down a bit more.

"What! We came looking for you and wow, we didn't expect to find you like this." David was saying, still staring back and forth between Tarjei and I.

I cant help it as a sly grin spreads across my face.

David see's it and winks. "Tj told us that when you guys kiss its 'pretty much explosive'.

I burst into laughter as Tarjei's face burns bright. "Is that so?"

Tarjei turns around and turns the water back on. "I only said that to shut you up David. Fuck off." He throws water on his own face.

David laughs. "Well, clearly you weren't lying cos wow. What we saw..that was hot boys. Hot."

"Just shut up please." Tarjei groans before facing him again. "What do you want?"

"Oh! Well the first clip of the season drops soon. We're going back to Alfred's to watch. You said you wanted to come earlier." David turns to me. "And you're more than welcome to come too Henrik. Even though you're not in it."

"Way to spoil it dude." Says one of Tarjei's friends, punching David in the arm.

"OW!"

Tarjei laughs. "Isak's love interest wouldn't be in the FIRST CLIP, Shaun. Don't be stupid." Then he faces towards me. "Do you want to come with us then?"

Heat floods through me. Tarjei is inviting me to come hang out with him and his close friends. I have to bite my tongue to keep from shouting to the roofs. "Yeah! Sounds like fun."

"Wait." We all look at another one of Tarjei's friends. "So this guy..." He gestures to me. "This is Henrik? This is the guy who's going to be playing your lover?"

Tarjei looks straight up at the ceiling, his expression as if he wished the ground would please swallow him up.

Bursting into laughter I lean forward with my hand out. "Henrik Holm. Isak's and apparently Tarjei's lover."

The boy grasps my hand and shakes it. "Rumen. You know that I meant." He waves his hand.

"Okay! We're done. You're leaving. We're leaving. Lets go." Tarjei pushes David back and its gets the rest of them moving. "We're going to miss it if we don't go now." His friends voices all mesh together with complaints and shouts to head out.

I follow Tarjei out into the hallway, stopping when he suddenly turns around. "You sure you want to come?"

I cock an eyebrow at him. "Trying to get rid of me already?"

Tarjei smirks at me. "Something like that." Then he leans up and softly places a kiss against my lips. "and by the way.." He pulls back and I almost get lost in that sea of green. "You don't leave mine either."

\---

We both ended up sleeping at his friends house.


	7. The Interuptions: Tarjei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ao3 confuses the hell out of me. so sorry my fic isn't fancy or anything. :)  
> soz this is a bit dialogue heavy.  
> thanks everyone for the nice comments. they really do make my day xx

"Tarjei."

I feel a hand nudge my shoulder. I groan and bury my head deeper into my pillow. Distantly in my mind I can hear a buzzing.

"Tarjei. Your phone has gone off twice."

I peel my eyes open and raise my head. Looking to my left; I'm greeted with a shirtless, hair in every direction, Henrik.

He smiles. "Hey boyfriend."

Oh. That's right. Last nights events form in my mind. We had stayed up late after watching the first clip at Alfreds. Henrik and I then passing out on the floor; him spooning me. Then when Rumen had to get up early his alarm woke everyone. Henrik and I decided to go to his flat to sleep some more. We fell asleep as soon as we hit the bed.

I return his smile. "Hi. What time is it?"

"Well good morning. it's about noon. Your phone's been ringing." He reaches over and grabs it from the bedside table before handing it to me. "Normally I would've left it. But whoever it is obviously needs to talk to you."

I turn on my screen and sit up. Fuck.

"Shit. Its Julie. What day is it!?" I quickly look at the date and my heart ceases pounding. I didn't have any filming scheduled today. Why was she calling me?

"Everything alright?" Henrik asks.

I look up at him and finally really take him in. He's leaning against his headboard, blanket pooled around his shirtless waist. He brings a hand up and tousels his hair before flopping it back to the bed. My eyes follow every move. He looks so warm. So soft. I want to engulf myself into his arms and feel that heat from his body.

I put my phone on the bed and scoot towards him. He immediately lifts an arm and pulls me to him. His hand playing with my hair as I settle against him. Skin on skin.

"Mmm? Tarjei?" Henrik kisses my forehead. "Everything okay?"

"What? Oh. Yeah. Well," I let out a breath. "I'm sure everythings fine. Julie's just been calling me. I'll call her back in a minute. It's probably about a script or a scene."

I feel Henrik nod. And a comfortable silence falls over us. I almost fall back asleep when his chest rumbles with a chuckle.

"You were adorable last night."

Grinning, I tilt my head up towards him. "Fuck off. Shut up."

Henrik laughs out loud. "You really were. All jealous about me dancing in a crowd." He tightens his arm around me.

I huff. "I wasn't jealous. I had too many beers."

"Mmhmm."

"You know what-" I move and shove him so quickly that he nearly falls off the bed in surprise.

"Hey now!" Henrik lifts his eyebrows at me.

And before I could even speak he pounces on me, pinning me to the bed. His hands holding my wrists. My breath almost stops as he leans slowly on top of me. He knows exactly what he's doing. The fucker.

Henrik smirks. "Now, what was that?" He brings his face closer to mine, almost taunting me. "You were what?"

I roll my eyes. "Fucking bastard. Fine." I know I could probably break his hold on me, but this position is just too inviting. "Slightly. I was slightly jealous. But that's only cos of the leftover emotion from set."

A grin. "I'll take it." He moves to get off of me but I bring my thighs up to his hips to hold him there.

I hear his breath hitch, and I knowingly wet my lips. His eyes watch my tongue and he swallows. Suddenly I'm very aware of blood rushing down to a certain part of my body. I tilt my head back, exposing my neck to him; I know it's a favourite spot of my body of his.

His pupils fixate on my throbbing pulse, and just as he leans down; my phone rings.

"No! Leave it!" I whine.

But Henrik had already released me and reached for it. "It's Julie again. You probably should answer it." He places it on my chest and sits back on his haunches.

I sigh and grab my phone while sitting up. "Fine. But don't move."

Henrik lets out a laugh. "Yes sir. I do have to use the bathroom though."

"Acceptable."

"Answer the phone." He slides off the bed and heads towards his bedroom door.

"Don't tell me what to do."

I hear his laugh and the bathroom door shut.

Sighing again, I answer;

"Hello?"

"Wow, so you are alive?" came the amused voice.

"What do you expect? Its Sunday. I have the day off. Whats up?" my voice in a rush. I want to end this call and get back to Henrik being on top of me.

"I'm fine thank you." She laughs. "Jesus T, whats your hurry? You belong to me for the next two months. Have a little respect." I hear the grin on her face in her words.

I chuckle. "You're right. I'm sorry. How are you, oh master of my life?"

"Nevermind that's worse. Shut up. Any way." She lets out a breath. "I wanted to let you know that I changed some lines around in the kitchen scene we're shooting on Friday."

"Okay. Change it drastically or?"

"No. We just decided we liked what Henrik improvised at his audition and we wanted to include it."

I raise my eyebrows in surprise. "Oh? That's pretty cool. Do you want me to tell him?"

"So you're with him right now." It wasn't a question.

"Um. Maybe?" I reply.

I hear a soft sigh. "Look. What you do in your personal life is your business. I'm glad you two are so close. And as a director; I'm honestly stoked about it. But also I'm slightly wary. You understand why?"

I nod before realizing she can't see me. "Yeah I get why you would be. But uh." I swallow. "You don't have to be. It's nothing serious." I feel a slight twinge in my chest saying that outloud. "Just..you know. Coworkers. Hanging out." The feeling drops to my stomach.

She's silent for a moment. "Mmm. Okay. Well, whatever it is; keep it up, you're chemistry is exploding on camera. Just..." She clears her throat. "Well, you know when you are Isak and when you're you so. Moving on."

I half smile. Its one of the things I like about Julie, she doesn't get overly emotional or too much into anyone's life. She just is a solid rock of a support. A friend who's there when you need her. I'd take her to battle with me. 

"But yeah no need to tell him, I texted him about it this morning." she continues. 

"Cool."

More silence. I hear the hesitation.

"Something else Julie?" My intrigue taking over.

"So...um, Mari and I just finished the final touches on episode 5 and 6." She trails off.

"Oh good. More for me to memorise." I tease.

"I want to meet up and go over it with you."

I pause when I hear the strain in her voice. This definitely is different. For the past 2 seasons, Julie just hands us the script and goes. I mean yeah I'm the main so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised about her meeting up. But still. Her and I briefly went over the first 4episode scripts. But not at too much length. This feels important. 

"Um. Okay? Yeah. Everything okay? Does Isak get hit by a bus or something?" Always go for humour.

She laughs. "No. No nothing like that. Just want to make sure everything goes the way it needs to." She coughs. "So next week is the underwater kiss. Are you and Henrik ready and prepared?"

Nice subject change. I let it slide. "Well, I am. Not sure about Henrik." Speak of the devil, Henrik opens the door to his bedroom. Hair slightly damp, he's wearing nothing but a towel. My mouth dries as he walks in. I follow him with my gaze as he walks to his dresser and pulls out a pair of briefs and sweats. A moan almost escapes me as he suddenly drops his towel so that his arse is facing me.

"Tarjei?" Julies voice snaps me back and I look away, feeling the blush all over my body.

"Uh. What?" I missed what she had said.

She lets out a chuckle. "Fucks sake, nevermind. SOMETHING obviously has your attention."

Henrik walks over to the bed, now wearing the sweats, and lightly falls next to me.

"Something like that." I mutter.

Henrik reaches out and starts to trace his fingers against my clothed thigh, just rubbing back and forth.

"I'll let you go then, just text me when you have free time soon, alright?" I hear her say faintly.

His hand is now moving higher, caressing the dip of my leg joint and my hips.

"Y-yeah I will. Bye." I stutter out before hanging up.

I lightly slap at Henrik's hand. "Fucker. That was our BOSS I was on the phone with."

Henrik throws back his head and lets out a laugh. "All the more fun!"

He leans up and over to gently place his lips against mine. Just a soft press of his lips. I move to deepen it but he pulls away. He nudges my nose with his as I open my eyes in slight disappointment. 

Henrik see's and tries to hide his grin. "Lets go outside."

I roll my eyes and stifle a whine. "Why? It's our day off from filming!"

"Well I have work this evening but that's exactly why we should go out. It's a beautiful day! We always just laze about."

I frown at him. "That's not a bad thing." I grumble. I know i'm being selfish but damnit, he just looks too good and I just want to touch him all day within his bed. I suddenly feel heat spread across my face and neck so I look down. He must think that's all I want him for.

Henrik places his hands behind my neck, using his thumbs to tilt my head up. "Hey." He smiles. "Don't get me wrong, staying in with you is great. I just thought it would be fun to go grab some food and go over scenes together." His grin widens. "Then after, we can come back and make out for the rest of the day." He winks.

I laugh and lean forward, meeting his awaiting lips. I linger on his mouth, sliding my tongue against his bottom lip then gently biting it, releasing as I pull back. Meeting Henriks eyes, I'm happy to see that his pupils were slightly blown. His breath a little heavy. Good.

Putting on my most innocent smile, I return his wink. "Lets go then." 

\---

25 minutes later found us sitting on top of a hill in the park. Sandwiches half eaten and scripts laid out between us.

"I think if we maybe just go about it like we did at my audition?" Henrik continues. "Julie only added those couple of lines. Everything else stays the same."

I nod. "Yeah, yeah I think so too. That was quite a moment. I hope we can bring it across on camera."

Henrik swallows a bite. "Oh, we can. I've seen the video."

I almost choke on my soda. "The fuck?! Has everyone seen your audition tape but me??" I roll up my sandwich paper up in a ball in frustration. 

"I asked Julie if I could see it and she emailed it to me." Henrik shrugged. "I figured it would be good to see it, see how it worked and such for this coming scene."

"Good idea." Why didn't I think of that, I internally chastise myself. I selfishly just want to see it to study us, and the moment our connection was formed. I clear my throat. "So, you do know we have to kiss underwater next week?"

Henrik grins. "I'm so ready for that! Can you open your eyes underwater?"

"Yeah, can you?" I ask.

"Yeah, after a bit and when my eyes adjust to it."

I nod. "Should be fun. Another big moment for Isak."

"Even too. He's been wanting this for weeks." Henrik leans back on his palms.

I smirk up at him. "You keep sayin this. Tell me more."

"Tell you more what?"

"About Even."

Henrik cocks an eyebrow at me. "I have. Many times. Almost every day."

"No I mean," I wave my hand around. "You don't really dive into his backstory or his mindset or his thoughts or anything."

Henrik stiffens, shifts his gaze away quickly before returning to mine with an easy grin. "Fine. I think that Even has been harbouring his interest in Isak for a good long while. That he saw him somewhere, school probably; and instantly thought he was the most beautiful boy, an angel. And made it his mission to find out everything about him. It took him ages to attempt to get the courage to talk to Isak. Kosegruppa was his chance." He shrugs and looks up to the sky, closing his eyes against the sun. 

"Wow." I state in surprise, watching his face turn into a giant smile.

"You asked." He chuckles.

I lie back on the grass as a comfortable silence descends upon us. My mind rolling that new information around. Guess it makes sense. With how desperate Even was in that boys restroom, taking the paper tissues. Or him lying about forgetting his ID. Or how he's going to almost kiss Isak in the kollectives kitchen in this upcoming party scene.

I smile. I'm really excited to film these next couple of weeks. They'll be fun and pivotal to the story. Also there will be more of solo Henrik and I scenes. Can't wait for that either.  
The first episodes clip dropped last night. Second one was this morning. And from the messages I checked on the way here, they've been received well. I let out a light sigh. I'm relieved. I was a bit worried. I know that season 2 was the season that everyone loved the most. Noorhelm. I just hope that people will still watch once they learn that William is in London. and isn't coming back. That season covered a lot of important life issues; but Isaks does too. I pray people will give it a chance, give me a chance to do it justice.

"Hey, T." Henrik murmurs.

I open my eyes and look over at him putting on his sunglasses. "Yeah?" Fuck he looks good with those on.

"There's some girls down this hill that have their phones out; looking up here a lot." He subtly nods his head towards them. "Shall we go?"

Sitting up, I glance in the direction he's referring to, and sure enough, two girls in their teens are looking up at us; clearly recognising me. I'm not particularly in the mood to pose for a photo so, "Yes lets go."

We both stand to gather our rubbish and scripts before walking in the opposite way of the girls.

Henrik lets out a laugh as we throw our scraps in a passing bin. "Jeez. I'm kinda glad Even hasn't been in any clips yet. They would've attacked us." He nudges me with his arm. "You alright?"

I shrug. "I mean, I'm kinda used to people taking secret photos of me. Its annoying that they just wont come up to me. But it comes with the job I guess.." I look over at him. "I still don't like it though. I don't like that i'm getting recognized more and more. And honestly? It'll get worse as the season progresses. I remember Josephine getting almost mobbed when she'd go to the coffee shop."

Henrik nods, understanding written in his eyes. He grasps my hand hanging between us and gives it a squeeze. We walk like that for a moment before we pass a group of girls, Henrik drops my hand immediately and fixes his glasses, zipping up his jacket a bit more.  
I watch him with amusement almost, to ignore the dull feeling beginning to grow in my chest.

"You know.." Henrik begins. "Once the last clip airs in episode one, you and I may have to be a bit more cautious hanging out in public."

The familiar dull feeling spreads. Those old doubting thoughts breaking into my mind. _This is only for the show. His feelings for you are artificial. It's not real. It'll end when Skam ends. What you two have can't be possible. Can't be real-_

"Just for the sake of Even and Isak." Henrik continues. He looks over at me and smiles, his cainines showing. "Don't wanna ruin surprises for the fans now. Plus, Julie would peel our skin if we accidentally spoiled something."

My mind instantly quiets at his words.  
Oh.  
For the sake of Isak and Even. He doesn't want to spoil the show.  
I almost laugh, of course my brain would overreact. Fuck.

He must've noticed my internal dilemma, because he pulls me flush to his side; pressing a simple kiss on the side of my head before speaking again.

"I love hanging out with you. And i'm not ashamed to be in public with you." He whispers.

I close my eyes as the ache in my chest disappears and is replaced with pure calmness.

Henrik tightens his grip around me. "I just know I can't keep my hands off you for too long, and we all know that Jodel users are everywhere. So better safe than face some form of Julie and Mari wrath."

Laughing I pull away from him, looking up at his face. We slow to a stop, right in the middle of the walkway. So much for being under the radar.

I reach up and brush his cheek softly, "Thank you." I mutter, knowing he understands everything i'm trying to say.

Henrik leans into my touch before grabbing my hand and kissing it gently. 

He lets it drop between us and we continue on our walk.

"What time did you say you had work?" I wonder.

Henrik pulls out his phone, "16.00 but lemme check again." He scrolls for a moment before he stops dead in his tracks. "FUCK! They changed my schedule. I have to be at work in like 20minutes. Shit."

Disapointment floods my body but I force a grin. "Fuck man. You better hurry."

"Fuck. Yeah. Hey." He runs a hand through his hair before reaching out and pulling me to him. "Today was fun. See you tonight?"

I clear my throat. "Uh, I actually have an exam tomorrow so I should probably get good sleep tonight."

Henrik pulls back, an amused look on his face. "Do you not sleep well with me?"

"I sleep too well with you, that's the problem." I roll my eyes.

"Its because I keep you sated." Henrik laughs at my deepening blush before pulling me in to his chest again. "But really, this is good. We don't need to always sleep with each other, go get some good rest."

The dull twinge awakens in my chest but I push it down.

We pull away and I grin up at him. "See you on Tuesday though. Dancing chicks!" I wiggle my eyebrows.

Henrik rolls his eyes. "You don't even say any lines to me though." He whines.

I lightly shove him away, laughing. "Get out of here. Go to work."

"Fine." He leans over and places a kiss on my forehead. "Talk to you later. Go study those invisible lines so you don't fuck them up."

"Why am I even friends with you?"

Henrik winks and starts walking backwards. "You love me! Bye!" He waves and half runs down the walk.

I stand there and watch him disappear from my sight.

Fuck.

I think I'm starting to.

\---

"But the PRECISION of how well I threw it."

"Oh my god..Shut up."

"Tarjei, did you even SEE the wrist flick technique I used?"

"How are you STILL talking about this? it's been 4 days!" I laugh.

We were sitting on the couch at the kollective flat we use for filming. The place was overly crowded. Julie had called for extras for this party scene and I don't think she anticipated the amount of people that showed up. Everyone was milling about, waiting for their turn for our make up lady to apply the glow in the dark paint on their body parts. I hadn't gotten mine yet, but I didn't want to wait with the others, when I could be talking to Henrik here on this comfy sofa. He was going on about the scene we filmed on the other day. And how it only took him one try to flick the red snapback to my lap.

I was nervous for this scene of course. The almost kiss. How terrified Isak is if people discover he likes boys. That he literally focuses on the fact that Emma has short hair to even stomach the thought of kissing her. Watching Even make out with Sonja.  
The almost kiss.

I lean back into the cushions and close my eyes. The almost kiss. The fact that Isak even let it happen is such a big deal. Even is bringing him slowly to life.

I feel Henriks hand start playing with my hair, not saying a word, just being his calming presence in the bustle of this room.

Henrik. I try to not let my smile grow on my face.  
HE's the only one I can even imagine doing this scene with. The only one i'm comfortable to do it with. I know he'll bring his best for this scene. I know he lives for Even's extraness. This scene is chalked full of it.  
There's no one else that could be on this journey with me. Henrik brings Even to life.

"Tarjei! Make up lets go!" 

I open my eyes at Mari's voice. "Coming!" I turn to find Henrik staring at me with a fond smile on his face. "Mmm?" I hum.

Henrik smile grows softer and he shakes his head. "Nothing. Just.." He lets out a breath. "I'm really glad that we get to do this together." He brushes my hair one last time before dropping his hand.

This connection gets intense sometimes. The way he knows my thoughts from just looking at me. How one of us can feel the other without having to touch. Intense; But I wouldn't change it for the world. I cherish it.

I pick his hand up and squeeze it with mine. "I can't imagine anyone else, but you."

He reaches out with his other hand and thumbs at my cheek gently. "Me either." he mutters.

The moment settles over us, green not leaving blue. All the words unsaid are understood. Smiles form between us in sync.

"TARJEI! NOW!"

I jump up and rush towards makeup. "Sorry!"

Bold pink stripe on each cheek. Hair carefully molded. Black tshirt sleeves rolled up. I nod at Julie.

"Bring it."

\---

It was beautiful. The moment in the kitchen. Even trying to open up Isak. First with a heartfelt statement, then with humour. Isak, trying to deny himself to feel, but oh how he feels. His emotions toward Even broke through the walls he's built up. Little by little. Even knows. Even saw it. Saw the life appear in Isak's eyes. Saw the longing. Even if it was for a split moment. Even saw it. And Isak let him.

We did that. Henrik and I. We pulled that scene off. We're happy with how it turned out. Julie told us it was better than our audition, that we were more 'explosive'. She told us that people may actually get angry at Noora for interrupting their kiss. I secretly hope so.

Henrik left a little bit ago with Carl and Theresa. They're all going to dinner. I actually spoke to Theresa tonight and got to know her. She's pretty cool. She seems really happy with her girlfriend. And that helped my jealousy dissipate. I'm planning on meeting up with them later but I've been putting off seeing Julie about ep 5 script all week. I figure tonight was as good as any to get it over with.

So here we are. Sitting parked in Julies car. The script in my hands.

"And you want me to read it now?" I question her, eyebrow cocked.

Julie nods. "I..I need to know how you feel about it."

Dread and slight anxiety starts to fill me. "Um. OKay?"

"Don't...no just read it."

I nod. "Alright."

I sensed her watching me, watching every reaction or emotion I release on my face as I read. But by the time I got to the locker room scene. I almost forgot she was in the car. That scene just seems so strained between them? 

"Why did you word things differently in this locker scene?" I decide to ask.

She tilts her head at me. "What do you mean?"

"This scene just seems really intense and specific." I look over at her.

Julie's face is stone. "Just keep reading T, please."

I stare at her for a second longer before I continue. With each page I turn, the more my dread spread throughout my body. "No." I whisper. I turn more pages, inducing more anxiety. "No." I say more firmly. I get to the last page and I slam it shut. "What the FUCK Julie?!" I turn towards her.

She holds out her hands. "Tarjei, listen. Its crucial to Isaks development. He has to go through this."

"He finally opens up to someone, lets himself get lost in kissing someone RIGHT for him, a BOY. and then you have this boy rip his heart into shreds?!" My chest is heaving and I see red. "How is that fair? How can you do that to him? Hasn't he been through enough?!" I know i'm blowing this up. I know that Julie has the master plan and I should just shut up, but my mouth can't seem to stop. "Isak finally gets a taste of being truly happy, and you're tearing it away from him. How is that going to help his development? He's going to spiral."

Julie just lets me yell, watching me calmly. "Yes. He does spiral."

I jerk my head at her. 

"But, he needs to. He needs to hit rock bottom for something else to happen." She finishes.

"Let me read ep 6 then. So I can see how this gets resolved." I almost snap.

Julie looks at me incredulously. "Are you joking? I'm not letting you read shit until you've calmed down."

I grit my teeth and let out a huff. "I'm calm."

"You're not. I expected you to be upset, but not this much. Whats going on?" She looks at me with such concern. The air in the car starts to feel thin.

I suddenly can't breathe. "I need to go, I need to get some air."

"Tarjei-"

"No no, please. I'm sorry for being so upset I just..I can't..I just need to get some fucking air." I grasp at the door handle and yank it open. 

I scramble out of the car and stand up, taking deep breaths of the chilly wind.

"I'm sorry." Her voice seems small.

Turning, I see her fiddling with her keys. I take another deep breath in. "Don't be. I'm sorry for overreacting. Your writing is brilliant. IF you say this needs to happen, then it needs to happen. I trust you." I grip the door of her car. "I just need to take a moment and wrapped my head around it."

Julie nods, giving me a small smile. "Whatever you need. When you're ready, I'll have ep 6 for you. I think you'll be surprised and happy with it."

I nod at her. "I'm sure I will be. Talk to you later." And with that, I shut the passenger door and start down the street.

It's still difficult to breathe. I start counting my steps. _1,2,3,4,5 breathe, 1,2,3,4,5 breathe._

I feel the script still in my hands, slightly crumpled as I had it in a fisted hold. I smooth it out and look at it. I still can't believe how hard Isaks heart is going to break. To have this boy he was falling for, this boy who was opening his eyes to life; this boy. Even. Even. Henrik. I pull out my phone, finding his name and calling. He answers on the second ring.

"Hey! I was just about to call you. We finished dinner and they went home so I'm just back at my flat. Did you want to come over?"

Tears suddenly formed in my eyes, I just want to curl up in his arms and have him take this feeling away. I wipe them away, frustrated. "Yes." I clear my throat. "Yes i'll be there in 20."

He pauses. "Are you okay Tarjei?" 

A smile forms on my face, he always knows. "I'm fine."

"Did...did she give you episode 5 script?" He asks, apprehensively.

I stop walking. "What?" I can almost hear the pounding in my ears. "Wait..Have you read it?"

Another pause.

"Oh my god."

"Tarjei-"

"NO! What the fuck? You knew?! You knew what Isak is about to go through?"

"Tarjei." His voice low and calming. "Please. Please come to me. And we'll talk about it. Please."

I start walking again and make a beeline to the closest bus station. "I'm on my way."

"Be safe."

I hang up as the tears form up again.

_how can they do this to isak....._

_.......but how will Henrik be able to do this to me_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhhh I know i know! don't hate me. The next chapter picks right off from this. and just fyi it gets a tiny bit angsty. nothing too bad though I promise.f so. thanks for being patient with me. I'm trying to update more than just once a week.


	8. The Scripts: Henrik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiii. So.
> 
> Remember when I said there would be angst in this? I'm a whimp. Theres hardly anything cos I couldn't.  
> Not yet anyway. I will say that in later chapters there will be angst. Nothing super over the top, but hopefully enough to pull at your heartstrings. Apologies in advance.
> 
> I may (definitely) go back and edit the travesties that are the smut scenes in my previous chapters. Who let me write them? They're awful. Sorry for them. I was young and naïve. I'll let you know when I do, incase some of you want to read them when I rewrite them.
> 
> I'm like wine, I get better with old age..Or in this instance, better with every chapter I write.
> 
> Anyways, hope you like it. Thank you for everyones kind comments! they make me smile and I looove the feedback. xx
> 
> I'm snapbackskam on twitter. I mostly cry over Isaks snapbacks and post a shit ton of gifs. Come say hi if you'd like.

I stare at my wall for a solid minute when Tarjei hangs up on me. Then I make myself walk over to my desk to grab my pack of cigarettes and my lighter. I pull one roll out as I head over to my large windowsill. As I look out, I notice that its raining pretty heavily. Typical. I light my cig and sit on the sill, opening the window to breath out the smoke into the wet air.

What the fuck.

I knew Tarjei would be upset; how can he not be? He cares so much for Isak; how Isak feels affects him.

I just didn’t think he’d be THIS upset by it.

I feel my phone buzz in my pocket. I pull it out immediately, thinking its Tareji.

It wasn’t.

_Julie: So just fyi….Tarjei read episode 5 . He wasn’t too happy with it._

I snort. No shit. I let out a puff of smoke.

**So I gathered.**

_Julie: Fuck. Did he call you?_

**Yeah. He’s actually headed to my flat.**

_Julie: Does he know you’ve read it?_

**He figured it out.**

_Julie:Okay..well maybe you can calm him down. You still have your copy of ep 6?_

I inhale a drag and glance over to my desk, where all my scripts were kept in.

**Of course.**

_Julie: If you can get him to chill out, I give you permission to give it to him to read._

**Uh. You should be the one to do that.**

_Julie: True. But it might be a bit better coming from you._ /p>

**Okay. Or he’ll just get more pissed off that I read that one as well.**

_Julie:Imagine if he knew you know the entire outline up until ep 9._

I let out the smoke and feel that growing guilt.

**You’re not helping.**

_Julie: Look, just try to get him to calm down. Talk the episode over between you two, I think that will help lots. Feed off each other on how to approach the scenes._

_Julie: I’ve honestly never seen him that upset over a script before though. Fuck._

_Julie: I’m almost dreading giving him episode 8 script._

Me too. Shit. I lean my head back and inhale the last drag, holding it in my lungs before letting it out slowly.

_Julie: Remember, don’t you dare mention to him that Even is bipolar, Henrik._

I stub out the end of my smoke and bury my face in my hands, letting out a massive sigh.

The day after Tarjei and I first kissed, Julie and I had met up. And she gave me her entire vision of Even. The first thing she said to me was “Even is bipolar. He will have an episode during this season. He’ll be manic, and then depressive. I want you to do research.” I threw myself into research. I looked up every article and read any book I could find on bipolar disorder. Julie even helped set up a meeting with a psychiatrist to help me approach how to be manic. And how to act when depressive.

Im so nervous to film those scenes. To portray going through all of that. And not only that, but Isak doesn’t know until end of ep8. Which is why I know what happens cos Julie wanted me to be prepared to act those scenes, and also to incorporate gravity of lines in previous scenes. Like in ep 5. In the locker room. Where Isak will hurt Even more than imaginable and not even know it.

Tarjei won’t even know it. Won’t know why I’m going to react the way I do to THAT line.

I lift my head and angry pick up my phone.

**I won’t. But I still think its fucked up.**

_Julie: It’s not like I’m telling him the night we film the hotel scene Henrik. I’m going to tell him after we finish ep 6._

**He’s your main. And you’re not telling him a massive part of the MAIN’S story.**

_Julie: Let me be the director. I know what I’m doing_

_Julie: Just try and calm him down. And please let me know if he does end up reading 6._

Huffing, I shove my phone back into my pocket and glare out the window. It’s raining harder now. I hope Tarjei had on a warm enough jacket.

I close my eyes briefly and take in a deep breath. Tarjei. I don’t know what to expect when he gets here. I can only hope I’ll be able to calm him down and talk to him. Also I hope I don’t accidentally let it slip. Julie would murder me.

Just have to approach it like how we’ve approached every scene we read together. Focus on the acting. Its Even and Isak. Isak and Even. Not Henrik and Tarjei. Its not us going-

My eyes snap open.

Fuck.

That’s why-Is that why? Could he be upset over…how this could affect us? But It wont? It won’t affect us. I won’t let it. Work is work and we leave it there when the cameras turn off. We’re not Isak and Even. Tarjei knows that.

Doesn’t he?

I mean sure, when I’m Even, its not hard to stare at Tarjei as Isak in fondness, with longing. It’s not hard to pretend to have feelings for Isak, when its tarjei giving me all that chemistry to act off of. It’s not hard to differentiate my feelings from Evens. I turn Even off as soon as I leave set. I know I’m with Tarjei in his bed or my bed. I know its Tarjei’s body responding to my own. That its Tarjei’s hands softly stroking me to hardness. Tarjei’s mouth swallowing up my gasps. Tarjei cleaning us up and snuggling up on my chest to sleep.

Don’t I?

My building buzzer sounds off; making me jump and pushing my thoughts away.

He’s here. I walk over to the wall and press the button to let him in.

Standing by the door, I wait. And breathe.

One hard pound.

Fuck. Here we go.

I let out a breath and open the door.

We stare at each other for a moment. Air becoming thick. I open my mouth to attempt a greeting but my throat itches. Coughing, I open the door wider and gesture for him to come in.

He walks in slowly, stopping immediately in the entryway, carefully taking off his soaked shoes. I watch him for a moment before deciding to cut this stupid tension away.

“Oh. Was it raining?”

I feel rather than see him roll his eyes as he takes his wet socks off, but he still stays silent.

Lets try again.

“Or have you developed a habit of jumping into fountains?”

Still silence. I could almost hear the water droplets from his clothes hit my floor.

“But uh yeah, hey.” I smile at his bent over back. “Hey boyf-“

“Stop.” Tarjei cuts me off. Straightening up, he faces me. I can see the light tear tracks on his face. The hurt etched around his mouth. “Please. Just…” He drops his gaze and rubs his hands across his face, muffling his voice. “Just stop.”

The smile fades from my face as I take in the gravity of his voice. Okay, okay. One step at a time.

I raise my eyebrow at him. “Do you want to shower to warm yourself up? I’ll throw your clothes into the wash. You can wear mine until theyre dry.”

Tarjei nods and follows me down my hallway to the bathroom. I flip on the light and step back as he enters. I linger at the doorway as he hesitates.

“Thank you.”

I half smile up at him. “Of course. Just leave your wet clothes out here by the door alright? I’ll grab them and put my dry clothes in the same place.”

Tarjei nods again and moves to shut the door, before opening it up again.

“Um…can.” He clears his throat and I notice that a slight blush has creeped up on his cheekbones. Damn, he is pretty.

“Yeah?” I encourage.

“Can..Can I wear your white DRIB hoodie?” He murmurs at the floor.

My heart swells. “Absolutely.” I smile at him, trying to hug him via my eyes.

“Thank you. Its just… really comfy.” He attempts to smile up at me and then shuts the door.

I shut my eyes and sigh for a moment before heading towards my room to grab some boxers, sweats and said hoodie. I wore it the other day and after a quick inhale of it, I’m glad to see that it still has my cologne on it; which I know Tarjei really likes.

Heading back to the bathroom I see the wet pile of clothes. Setting the dry ones down, I grab his wet ones and walk towards my laundry room. Perks of living alone, as I didn’t want to deal with a community laundromat.

I wander back to my room after starting the wash load. I flit around, straightening up things that are already straightened. Picking up clothes and tidying the floor. I get to my bed, wanting to move back the covers but…that would be presumptuous. I don’t want Tarjei to feel forced to stay. Nor do I expect him to after we talk.

I flop onto my duvet with a small groan. 

Our talk.

How am I even supposed to approach it? I guess I’ll let him start. Vent to me about the script, what he doesn’t like about it. And then we can go from there. I hope that he’ll be calm enough to talk and process this script like we do the others.

My eyes stray to my desk, where I know ep6 full script is in the top drawer. Yeah, HOW am I supposed to bring that up, Julie?!

I sigh, yet again, and press my palms into my eyes.

Episode 6 is so pivotal to Isak's story. It’s crucial. It's where he finally, finally opens up to someone. Tell them his darkest secret. Starts tearing down his wall and letting his soul see the sunshine.

I pop my eyes open and sit up abruptly. That’s it. That’s how I’ll tell him. Tarjei cares more about Isak than anyone of us. He would want to know that this pain is temporary and worth going through.

But what if his being upset is more than just about Isak.

I almost yell at my internal thought.

Because that’s what I’m scared of. I’m not sure if I’m ready to have THAT get thrown out between us. I freaked myself earlier with me doubting my not brining Even into our relationship.

Cos its starting to look like he’s brought a bit of Isak. And we told ourselves we were different than them. But are we?

“Hey”

I snap my head around as soon as I hear his voice. Tarjei is leaning against my doorframe. Hair fluffy and still lightly damp. My black sweats rolled up to his calves. And my hoodie. Oh god, why did I never let him wear it before? Tarjei isn’t that much shorter than me but my arms are quite longer. The sleeves of my hoodie hang over his hands in the most adorable way. He pushes one of the sleeves up, but it falls right back over his hand. He looks so soft and vulnerable. I need to get him in my arms immediately.

“Hi.” I stand up from the bed, but don’t move closer. “Um, so are you hungry?” I nervously scratch the back of my head.

Tarjei shakes his head at me, then lowers his head down a bit as he moves to my bed, gingerly getting on it and lying down on his usual side. He brings the pillow he usually uses to hug against his chest.

Its silent for a moment; him lying on my bed, me standing at the foot. Both of our eyes longing towards the other. Just as I open my mouth, he beats me to it.

“For fucks sake will you please stop acting like I’m going to explode and come cuddle me?” He smiles at me. The first real smile I’ve seen all evening.

I take it and give him a genuine one back. “You’re not going to explode?” I say as I ease onto my bed and crawl towards him.

I meant it as a joke but Tarjei half frowns. “No. I’m not...” I lay down next to him and he throws the pillow and reaches for me. I bring my arm around him and curl it over his shoulders as he lies his head on my chest; tucked beneath my chin. Our normal spots. “I’m not mad at you Henrik.”

Carding my fingers through his curls, I feel him let out a content sigh. Reaching, I circle my other arm around his middle back, pressing him more firmly to my body. I breath in his scent. Musk and mahagony, with a hint of my own body wash that he mustve used in the shower. I close my eyes and just enjoy this moment. 

We’re silent for a bit. Me, listening to Tarjei’s breaths; him, listening to my steady heartbeat. I continue playing with his hair and after a moment, Tarjei sighs again.

“You’re going to put me to sleep.” His voice low in the silence.

I smile above his head. “That’s okay. We can talk in the morning.” I’m half hoping he’ll say yes. A night sleep would do great for us to chat with clear heads.

Tarjei shakes his head and lifts it to face me. “No. I need to talk about it and try to make sense of it all.” He slowly gets off of me and sits up.

I move to follow suit but suddenly Tarjei climbs over me and straddles my hips.

Um. What.

He must’ve seen my confused look cos he smirks at me and bends down, placing his hands on my tshirt covered chest.

“But first..” He trails off, leaning his face closer to mine. “Can I kiss you?”

It takes a moment for my brain to catch up to what was happening, but once it did I spurred into motion and grasped his face, raising up slightly to meet his lips with mine.

Tarjei responds with sliding his hand in my hair, tangling his fingers in it and tugging. A groan escapes me and I open my mouth wider to allow our tongues to dance together. His lips feel like rose petals against mine. They’re so soft, yet right now they were fighting control to take and take. I sit all the way up, colliding our chests. My hands slide down his supple body until I got to the hem of my DRIB hoodie. I push underneath and caress my hands back up his back; feeling the hard muscles of his skin. Fuck. I need to ask him to bring me to workout with him sometime.

My thoughts get interrupted as Tarjei rips his mouth away from mine and starts placing openmouthed kisses and nibbles down my jawline towards my neck. His hand still in my hair, he pulls harshly; making my head snap back and I feel his teeth latch onto my weak spot underneath my jaw. 

“Ah! Fuck!” I cling to his back as a loud groan pushes through my swollen lips.

I can almost feel Tarjei smiling as he continues making his mark on my neck. I start panting as his free hand moves down my chest and gently teases by slipping his fingertips along my boxer waistband.

Tarjei finishes his bruise and leans back. Head tilted down, he flutters his eyes all innocent at me. Almost daring me to do something.

Oh this boy.

I grasp the bottom of the hoodie and tear it off of him before quickly flipping us over so that his back hits my bed.

“Ooof.” He huffs, trying to hide his pleased smile. “Getting a little impatient?”

His words make me hesitate a moment. Was he…was he expecting us to have sex tonight? I know that it wouldn’t be our first time with a boy for either of us; but it would be our first time together.

And that’s when I see it.

I place my hands on either side of his head and look into his brilliantly green eyes. And what i find is the confusion, the hurt, the wanting. Tarjei is still upset, he’s doing this to distract himself.

I feel the fire simmer throughout my body as I lower myself slowly to connect our lips again. This time, I control it. I keep it soft, smooth, gentle. I try to convey that I’m here. I’ll help you, just tell me how.

Tarjei must have felt the change in our tension, because he breaks the kiss and turns away, shutting his eyes. I stare at his incredible side profile for a moment before placing my hand under his chin and turning him to face up at me again.

“Tarjei.” I mutter.

He lets out a deep sigh and opens his eyes. And once again I’m momentarily breath taken by the colour of his emeralds. Emeralds that how hold so many emotions behind them. Emeralds that are trying to hold contact with my own sapphires.

I move my hand and gently caress his cheek, he keens into it; before finally steading his gaze at me.

“What do you need, baby?” I almost whisper. At this point I would give him the entire world and even break into a nearby pet store to bring him a puppy; if just to see his inner turmoil disappear.

Tarjei’s eyes close briefly at the name. I know its a weakness of his. 

“Just tell me.” I lean down and nose along his cheek, trailing down to his jaw and back up. “Do you want to talk first?” I keep my voice low, a breath against his ear. “Or do you want me to help you feel good?” I get to his neck and place a soft kiss on a throbbing protruding vein.

His breath has risen up a pace, his hands limply holding onto my biceps as I hover back over his face, trying to hold his eyes.

“Tarjei…” I mumur, trying one more time.

Finally, finally Tarjei sets his jaw and snaps his head towards me, eyes clear and confident. 

“I want your mouth.” His words soft but sure.

The words go straight to my already half hard cock, and I swallow before asking, “And where would you like my mouth to be?”

At that, Tarjei turns slightly red and glances down, “I uh, I cleaned…in the shower..so.” His voice barely audible.

I try to hold my grin, I really really do; but it becomes impossible and I feel it spread widely across my face. I can’t help but tease him. “You want me to eat out your arse?”

“Oh my god.” Tarjei throws an arm over his face and tries to shove me off of him with the other. “Why are you like this?” I see a smile form underneath his arm.

I grasp onto his shoving hand and bring it to my mouth. Tarjei removes his arm off of his face and stares up at me as I kiss his hand in mine gently, my eyes never leaving his.

A moment passes between us, and Tarjei nods at me, smirking. As if telling me that yes, he really does want this and why the fuck am I not between his legs right now? I smile and pull off my own tshirt.

I lean down and place my lips against his, letting my tongue curve against his cupid bow lips before I sit back up and start my path down his exposed chest. My mouth tracing every raise in muscle, teeth grazing a nipple; making him shudder as I continue lower and lower. After I place a final kiss onto the skin above the sweatpants waistline, I look up at him. His eyes connect with mine as he bites his lip and nods again.

I slowly push down his sweats and boxers at the same time, removing them all the way off. Climbing between his legs, I place my hands behind his knees and bring them up, placing his feet flat on the bed. I slide my hands down to the softness of his thighs and the tenderness of the skin where his thighs joint with his hips.

I lean down and take ahold of his leaking swollen cock, before placing a kiss right on the tip.

Tarjei hisses and his mouth drops open a bit. I thumb over the precum and slide my hand up and down his shaft for a couple of strokes, watching him twitch and huff out these little moans.

“Henrik.” He breathes. “Please.” He jerks his hip a bit off the bed as I twist my hand on a downstroke. “FUCK!”

I grin at him and slowly release his wanting cock. Settling myself on my stomach, I kiss all down his length then around the base of him before moving to that sweet spot of his connecting thigh joint. I stay there, wanting to leave a mark on that porcelain skin. Tarjei groans and digs his heels into the bed next to me. I pull away, and blow on that beautiful maroon mark before I push his thighs further apart.

“Hand me a pillow, would you?” I ask him.

Tarjei reaches out and grabs one, lifting himself up as I help him slide it under his hips. As he settles back down, I have a better angle of him. I place my hands on his cheeks and spread them a bit.

Fuck. His hole is just so pink and perfect.

I lean closer and gently rub my thumb across it. Tarjei gasps and his hips shift away slightly. I wrap my arms around his thighs, holding him down and getting into the best position for my mouth to reach him.

I lick one bold stripe across his hole and instantly blow lightly on it. 

“Ah shit.” Tarjei spits out, his thigh jerking.

I smile secretly to myself. Oh god, I was going to enjoy taking him apart.

Leaning in, I kiss his hole and then rub my tongue all over it. Licking strokes up and down and across it. Tarjei is a writhing mess, already. Between each gasp he makes is a loud moan. I continue licking and rubbing and smoothing my tongue over that pink pucker. My nose and my chin completely lathered in my own spit.

“Fuckfuckfuck Henrik fuck.” Tarjei whimpers.

His hips trying to close around me but I hold them down firmly. There will probably be bruises there in the morning. The thought makes my straining cock twitch. I pause my slow lapping for a split second before I dart the tip of my tongue against his hole. Over and over and over, trying to get it to open up for me.

Tarjei arches off the bed. “Oh god. Fuck. HENRIK FUCK!”

My grip on him tightens even more as his hips start thrusting down to meet my tongue. I glance up to find him with his head thrown back, both hands grasping my sheets, his knuckles white. Fuck. He looks so fucking hot. I groan and increase my speed. Finally, I feel his hole open for me and I lean in, impossibly closer. I readjust my grip on his thighs and I lose myself. 

“H-HENRIK FUCK!” Tarjei’s hip buck and thrash underneath me, but I keep my grip; his arse riding my mouth.

My entire face is dripping but I don’t dare stop. Tarjei’s moaning so loudly that I’m pretty sure my neighbors will come knock on my door. I keep up my assault with my tongue, pushing and poking and licking in and around his hole. Prodding with the tip then smoothing it down with the flat. My lips are almost suctioned around his rim and I bare my teeth a bit, just lightly grazing.

“Oh God..oh my god. Baby. Baby don’t stop.” His words tumble out of him. I’m pretty sure he has no idea whats coming out of his mouth at this point. The thought makes me smile and my teeth nip at his wet hole.

“I’m..I’m so…” Tarjei starts mumbling, followed by a loud groan as my tongue swirls inside of him.

I look back up at him and find him staring down at me, eyes wide, hair in shambles, chest rising and falling at a quick pace. I meet his gaze and release one of my arms to place my hand on his red, hard, leaking cock. 

I pull my mouth away as I start sliding up and down his length. “Come for me baby.” Then I dive back down and fuck my tongue into his hole.

The response of his body was immediate. As my hand and tongue match each other in movements; Tarjei’s body almost flies off the bed with how far he arches his back.

“HENRIK!” He screams as I feel his dick pulse under my hand. I pull away from between his cheeks and sit up. Tarjei has both hands gripping my head board, muscles straining, eyes closed, his face turned into his shoulder and he was biting it to hold in his scream. I feel precum leak out into my boxers, and I realise that I’ve had a wet spot there for ages.

I continue to stroke him through the end of his high, come painting his chest. Fuck he’s so fucking beautiful like this.

When I feel him soften, I remove my hand. Instantly going to palm myself. I was so hard it was becoming painful. Tarjeis eyes were still closed, he was still trying to control his breathing. Fuck it, I can’t wait.

I pull my sweats and boxers down to my knees, and I get up on all fours. I place my hand on my needy cock and start stroking myself fast. I groan softly as I twist on the upstroke and thumb over my slit, gathering up the precum to help my hand slide more swiftly.

Tarjei opens his eyes at my noises, he brings his arms back down to rest on the bed and watches me with his mouth open.

“Oh fuck. That’s so fucking hot.” He whispers.

His words spur me on and I moan as I tug even harder on my length. My thighs start quivering as I know I’m close to my release.

“Tarjei..fuck…you were so fucking good.” I murmur to him, groaning around my words. “Tasted so fucking good.”

Tarjei moans and slides closer to me, still laying on his back. “Come on me.”

I snap my head at him. Did he just say-

“Henrik, come on me. Please.” He whispers out.

I’m gone. That pushes me over the edge and I shoot my load out on his chest with a shout; watching my come mix with his on his creamy skin.

I pant for a moment before flopping down next to him. “Wow.”

“Holy fuck wow.” Tarjei mutters, voice low.

My mind is still trying to wind down, but I pull my sweats up and roll out of bed. I walk towards my door and grab the hanging towel behind it.

“Lets clean you up.”

Tarjei watches me with endearing eyes as I wipe our messes off of him. Then I throw the towel into the corner and grab his discarded sweats; tossing them to him as I climb back into the bed.

I watch as he pulls them up, his movements tired. When he lays back down, I reach out and pull him back against me; resuming our previous cuddle positions. Only this time we can feel skin on skin.

I trace down his spine lightly, taking in a soft sigh before speaking. “So…did I help? Do you feel better?”

He lets out a snort. “You more than helped.” He raises his head and connects our lips in a simple kiss. “Really, thank you.”

I smile down at him, and place a kiss on his forehead. “You’re more than welcome. That was amazing. You’re amazing.”

Tarjei ducks back down to my chest to hide his growing blush. “You are too. Holy fuck your tongue….” He trails off as I feel him shiver.

I squeeze him closer to me as I attempt to not let that get to my head.

We lie in a content silence for a moment, listening to the rain patter against the window.

“So.” Tarjei huffs out a sigh. 

Here we go.

“You read episode 5 then?” He asks.

I nod, “Yes. I did.” and 6. And I know the outlines for 7 and 8. I feel my guilt rise.

Tarjei moves his face into the crook of my neck and breathes in deep. “I don’t know why I got so upset at Julie. I feel bad about it now.” I feel his hand lightly trace my chest. “I just…I got so angry that she’s going to do that to Isak. To rip him apart and tear him down. Especially when he’s come so far at that point.” He shrugs. “But that’s Skam I guess.”

I let out a breathy laugh. “Yeah..but also T. I think…I think that Isak almost needs to go through this. He needs to get broken. He’s been glass for so long, so superficial; that when something real comes into his life, something that gave him substance..” I let out a breath. “It makes him feel more alive than he’s felt in his entire life. And yeah while what happens is very shitty, I personally don’t think Isak would change what happened for anything.” I press another kiss onto Tarjei’s forehead. 

Tarjei leans his head back so that we can see each others faces. His mouth is slightly open and I cock my eyebrow at him, suddenly feeling self conscious. 

“What?” 

He shuts his mouth and puts his hand on the back of my head, pulling me to him. I respond eagerly, encasing our lips around each other. Tarjei moves so softly against me, his cupid bows caressing every movement my lips make.

Pulling away, Tarjei brushes his thumb against my cheek. “Thank you. That was exactly what I needed to hear.”

A grin takes over my face, “Yeah?”

He nods. “Yeah. It’s like you know Isak better than I do.” He teases.

I laugh. “I only know him from the eyes of Even.” I bring my hand and card it through his curls. “And what I see from you.” Leaning down, I place a kiss against his lips before pulling away, hand still in his hair.

I guess it’s now or never.

“I uh..” I clear my throat. “I have..I mean, if you want to read..” I trail off again. Shit, I’m not approaching this eloquently.

Tarjei raises and eyebrow at me. “What?”

Like a bandaid. 

“I have episode 6 script with me..here. in my desk. “ I nod over at it. “If you…uh. Want to read it?”

Tarjei sits up instantly. “YOU have episode 6 script?”

I nod, following suit and sitting up as well.

_Please don’t ask why please don’t ask why._

“Why?” His tone curious.

I clear my throat, again. “Um, well. Julie kinda gave it to me to give to you.” I raise my hand to scratch the back of my head. “Said it would be better coming from me or something like that.”

Half true. I feel that familiar ache of guilt rise and spread. Like its written on my face.

Tarjei bunches his eyebrows together, frowning for a moment. Different emotions flit across his face and I can’t focus on one before it disappears. Normally, I can read him very well, channel into what he may be thinking; but right now he’s a mystery. I have no idea what's going on in that mind of his.

Suddenly he looks over at me and smiles, not a full 3 dimple smile, but a smile nonetheless. “And you’ve read it, I’m assuming?”

Nodding again, I wonder where he’s going with this.

“Lets read it then!” He winks at me. “Go get it!”

I squint at him for a moment. 

“What?” he almost sounds like a puppys bark.

“What's…happening?” I ask, tentatively

He shrugs. “I dunno..I just don’t think there's a reason I should be upset anymore. I can’t change it, I’m only a vessel. Its Julie’s work. She knows what she's doing. I trust her.” He lets out a laugh. “I just need to stop feeling sorry for myself and move on.”

Sorry for yourself? Or sorry for Isak?

I decide to not push him and I get out of the bed to pad across the room and grab the script out of the drawer.

“Now.” I say as I sit back down next to him, both of us with our backs resting against the headboard. “This episode is kinda sad..but, I think Isak had to go through what he does…to get to a pivotal scene in this episode.”

Tarjei tilts his head at me, curiously.

I raise my eyebrows at him. “Hmm?” I hand the script to him.

“Julie said something similar to me, that’s all.” He holds the script on his lap, rubbing his fingers over the coverpage.

I couldn’t help but smile at him, he’s so adorable. So endearing with his concerns and his love for Isak.

“You ready?” I ask softly. I reach for his hand and bring it to my mouth.

Tarjei smiles, almost lovingly at me before focusing on the pages in his lap. “Ready.”

\---

“That cheese toastie scene will be rough.” Tarjei mutters, face half hidden in the pillow.

The rain was a fading background noise to the pitch black room. The blankets were pulled around us as I pressed Tarjei’s back more firmly against my chest. One arm bent underneath my own head, the other wrapped around his waist, our fingers intertwined against his stomach.

I place a comforting kiss against his shoulder. “Yeah…it will be.” I sigh...If only you knew Even’s mind. “But we’ll get through it. Together.” 

“Together.” I hear him mumble. I knew sleep was about to overtake him, so I squeeze his fingers. 

Silence falls over us, and I close my eyes, welcoming the process of falling asleep.

“I’m so fucking proud of him.” Tarjei’s voice is barely above a whisper.

I open my eyes and scoot impossibly closer to him, hooking my leg between his under the covers. “Proud of who?”

“Isak.” Tarjei half rolls to look over his shoulder at me. “He finally comes out to someone. Finally finds his strength and tells Jonas his deepest truth.” He lets out a sigh. “I still can’t believe it. I’m fucking buzzing to shoot that scene; even though it’ll be difficult.” 

He rolls back onto his side and I place a kiss against his neck. “I love the way you are with Isak.”

I sensed his smile in his voice as he replied. “I love the way you are with Even.”

Placing another kiss right behind his ear, I nose at his hair before laying my head down, ready for sleep.

“Henrik?” The grip on my hand tightens for a moment, the voice hardly audible. 

“Yes?”

“I don’t..please..dont. I mean..” 

My heart almost breaks as I hear his words stutter out. The insecurities and hesitations. I feel what he’s trying to say radiate off of his body. 

How could he think that? This was always something I knew I was in for the long run. How could he not know that? Does he not know how difficult it will be for me to see him, even as Isak, in pain? How much the next episodes will be emotional turmoil for me as well?

Fuck, I want to talk to him so badly about Even. Tell him every single thing that’s going to happen.

The guilt almost becomes suffocating.

I take a deep breath and push it back down. Not the time for that.

For now…

“Tarjei.” I cut him off. “I’m here.”

I places kisses along his shoulder and up the back of his neck, feeling his body relax before I speak again.

“ and I’m always going to be here.”


	9. The Pool: Tarjei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Massive apologies for not updating last week..  
> I have no excuse; I just was having anxieties and insecurities about my writing and such.
> 
> I know a lot of you ask if i'm going to keep up with the story: YES OF COURSE.  
> I have this fic pretty much outlined clear to end of S4. So yeah i'm going to cover May 12 and everything. yay for the best Henjei day!
> 
> Ummm after some revising...I decided to throw in angst. PLEASE DONT HATE ME. I just want to pull on your heartstrings.  
> It'll come later though! And i'll warn you in the notes before the chapter. and It'll be quick and resolved. promise 
> 
> BUT: *spoiler alert* This will have a happy ending. Okay? 
> 
> also I did change my @ on twitter. i'm snapbackskam now. still me, new @.  
> Come chat with me. I'm british and weird.
> 
> Thanks for all of you who read this silly fic of mine. You're all kind. xx
> 
> -V

**I’m sorry for getting upset Saturday night. I don’t know why it got me so worked up…But I read episode 6 and I can understand now a bit.. Why Isak has to hit his low to be able to come out to Jonas.**

**Your writing has always been amazing Julie. I never have doubted that. I trust you with him.**

_Julie: Thank you T. I was a bit worried but I’m glad you’ve come around. And don’t worry…you care about Isak and how you reacted was understandable._

_Julie: Happy that you feel aright with ep6. I’ll be giving you ep. 7 within the next couple of weeks. Just putting some finishing touches on it._

**Can’t wait**

_Julie: Also it’s bloody Tuesday? You waited THIS long to apologise to me?!_

_Julie: :) so how was YOUR weekend Tarjei? What did you do hmmmm??_

**Oh my god. I’ll see you at 15.05 at the kollectiv. BYE**

I roll my eyes and slip my phone back into my pocket as the tram comes to my stop. Standing up, I notice a pretty brunette quickly look away from me, then slowly look back up. I close mouth smile at her, but continue out of the doors.

She was pretty. But I’m recently into blondes.

I bite my lip to contain my growing grin as I walk towards school. 

This weekend was…needed. Henrik and I stayed in bed all of Sunday. Laughing, playing Fifa, eating too much takeaway, and talking. Talking about everything and nothing. We discussed the approaching scenes; how we want to go about them. Even rehearsed a few lines.  
It helped. It helped me calm down so much. Henrik opened my eyes to see the bigger picture of Isaks life.  
My smile broadens.  
How is it that he knows exactly what to say and do to settle my mind? And body.

I feel my face flush.  
Flashes of Henriks mouth and hands all over my body cross my mind and I almost trip into the fence surrounding Nissen.  
48hours in his room and I still can’t get enough.

“TJ!”

I whip around to see one of my mates Jakob, running up to me. "Jakob! Hey!." I wait for him to catch up, and he approaches me; slightly out of breath.

"Where were you yesterday man?" He asks, slapping a hand across my shoulders as we walk across Nissens courtyard.

I try to not let my smile get too wide. "Had some Skam stuff." Kinda true. Henrik had the day off and he convinced me to stay with him for another whole day. His mouth is very persuasive.

Jakob looks over at me. "Thought filming this week starts later today?"

_Damnit, David._

I clear my throat. "Well yeah but I got TWO scripts this weekend that I needed to go over and process." We were nearing the west doors of Nissen, but as I reach out for the handle; Jakob pulls me to a stop.

"Tarjei, you know that you can just tell us that you were with Henrik. We don't care." Jakob gives me a smile.

"I know.." I sigh. "And its not like i'm hiding him or anything from you guys. Its just..." I run my hand through my hair. "I just...I don't know. Its hard to like-"

"You like him huh? More than what you originally thought?" He asks, cutting me off.

I let out a nervous laugh. Jakob always was the one out of our friends who is more in tune with everyones emotions.  
"I mean." I shrug. "He's a cool guy. We get along. Whats not to like about him?"

Jakob raises an eyebrow at me. "Try again."

This time I roll my eyes. "Jesus! Fine. Fine. Yeah." I look at my shoes scuffing the ground. "I..i'm starting to like him."

Jakob grins at me and moves to open the door. "Cool."

" 'Cool?' " I cock an eyebrow at him. "That's all I get?" I walk through the door and he follows behind me.

He shrugs. "What do you want me to say? Since you've met him, he's all you talk about to us. At first we all thought it was just because of how close you two need to be for the show but." He nudges my shoulder as we walk down the stairs towards the lockers. "Then you started to turn down any other person who tried to hit on you. Which, lets face it, was a huge red flag. And then we caught you two going at it at the party bathroom..and THEN you two were spooning on Alfreds floor-"

"Okay okay. I get it." I bite my lip to contain my smile.

"You are not subtle, T." Jakob glances at me before stopping at our lockers. "We all knew it. Just waiting for you to tell us."

I let out a breath and watch him fiddle with the lock. "Well like I was trying to say..I just.....I don't know how to label us. I don't know how to explain us." I shrug. 

Opening his locker, Jakob pulls a book out. "Does that matter though? I mean, as long as you two are on the same page with how you feel about the other.." He shuts his locker and faces me. "Fuck what anyone else thinks. Its between you and him."

I tilt my head at him. "That's...pretty much exactly what he said to me."

"Smart guy then. Listen to him." He turns around and starts down the hall.

I rush after him. "I do. I am. Just..." I glance around at the surrounding bodies rushing to their classes and lower my voice. "What if...what if he's not on my same page?"

Jakob stops and looks straight at me, he must've heard the insecurities in my voice. "Tj, have you ever told him how you felt?"

I shake my head. "No its..its a new feeling." Maybe; i'm almost sure I fell in deep at his audition, but now i'm only falling deeper. 

"Then how the hell would you know what page you're on?" He huffs out before starting back down the hall.

"Jake" I walk after him. "He's my fucking coworker. Our characters fall in love, not us. Its all going to end after fiming is over." The familiar dull ache starts back up as I speak. The words I don't want to say trying to bubble out.

Jakob stops at a classroom door. "Says who?" and walks inside, leaving me to stare after him.

\---

I thought I was in love once.

Her name was Stella. We had met at 3rd year party. We both were 16 and thinking we were on top of the world for being 1st years but cool enough to get an invite to this party.  
We hooked up that night; became inseparable afterward. We took each others virginity; and in that moment, I thought she was the most perfect. I let her become my world.  
It was after I got cast in Skam and season 1 started, that I started noticing a difference in her behaviour. She made excuses whenever I wanted to hang out, and then when we did hang out; it seemed as if she was showing me off. Wanting people to look at her in envy. She kept suggestion I use my 'fame' to get us into places. It ended up with me finding her on her knees at some Uni party I got us into, with two guys in front of her. And all she said when she saw me standing there was, 'Well, what did you expect?' 

After that, I was a bit...wild, I suppose. Destructive. Or as my mate Rumen calls it my 'dirty hoe phase'. I hooked up with whoever was willing, boys and girls. Slept with a few of them as well. I never left a party without getting some form of action. I liked it. I liked being in control of my feelings. Never letting myself get too attached.  
Then when Season 2 started filming, I stopped feeling sorry for myself and snapped back into reality. Kept my game on a casual level, only hooking up whenever I felt like getting some, not need.

But meeting Henrik threw all of that out the window.

I've never felt like this. This pull towards someone. It almost pisses me off. How he has this hold on me. Whenever i'm near him, every part of me lights up. It's like I only start breathing when he's near. My need to be around him consumes me.  
And the fact that I barely even spare a glance at anyone who tries to give me attention...they just don't compare. Don't come close to the 184cm tall, dark blonde hair, blue eyed boy.  
A part of my soul was awakened when I met him. Like all of the pieces coming together; forming to tell me that 'yes, this is right.'

But is it?

I try to not let the doubts take over. The thoughts that I've pushed down for weeks.  
Things like this don't happen. You don't fall for your coworker. A coworker who's job is to fall in love with your character.  
But that small part of glow keeps those thoughts at bay.

For now.

"Whatever you're doing, keep it up!" Julie's voice cuts into my thoughts.

I look over at her, sitting behind the monitor. "What?" Shit, were they filming? I wasn't even ready. 

Carl laughs from his spot by Josephine and Rakel on the couch. "Lookit this boy! So in the zone. Didn't even know you were filming, Jules."

I flip him off and turn to look at Julie. "Sorry, I was-"

Julie pops her head around the camera. "No! No whatever you were thinking about or whatever, was showing beautifully across your face. I got the reaction I wanted." She winks at me. "Lets keep going."

\---

"5am tomorrow T!" Julie calls to me before heading to her car.

I wave and start down the street to the bus stop, pulling out my phone.

**5am. Why do we do this job?**

_Henrik: Well, definitely not for the money._

I stifle a laugh as I pass a group of tourists.

_Henrik: At least i'll be there though! :)_

**That true.**

**So shall I come to yours tonight...or..**

I hesitate, the nerves trying to take over before I press send. His response was immediate.

_Henrik: Shit, I would say yes but I get off at 21. And then I have to go help my mum for a bit._

I swallow my disappointment as I stop and sit on the bench to wait for the tram. I knew his mum was in the process of setting up her own restaurant, Henrik's been there working late nights to help her get ready to open in a few weeks.

**That's fine. I'll sleep better anyways without hearing you snore.**

_Henrik: Excuse me? I do not snore. And even if I did, YOU take all the blankets so._

**So win win for both of us then. Finally getting a good nights sleep ;)**

_Henrik: I guess so ;)_

I laugh and stand up as the tram arrives; walking straight to the empty seat in the back. I feel my phone vibrate twice more.

_Henrik: See you bright and early!!_

_Henrik: I'll miss you in my bed tonight._

Butterflies explode in my stomach and I feel the heat all the way up to my face. I read the sentence once more before locking my phone and staring out the window; the grin obvious on my face.

I close my eyes and allow myself a moment to relish this feeling.

"Says who" I whisper. 

\---

"HOW are you THIS chipper THIS early?" Marlon grumbles at me.

I beam at him. "Coffee? Good nights sleep?"

Marlon rolls his eyes. "Sure sure." He adjusts his jacket.

"Halla boys." Henrik comes out from seemingly nowhere; making me jump. He smiles and places a gentle hand on my back. "You ready?"

Trying to ignore the rush of heat where his hand is touching me, I swallow and nod. "Yeah. are you? You ready to open the locker?"

Henrik laughs. "Shit. I'll probably break my hand, watch it not open the first try."

Marlon grins. "I'll take that bet!"

"Lets go lets go lets go! Positions everyone. I want this done in two takes." Julies voice rings out.

Marlon winks at us and moves behind the cameras. I take a deep breath, grounding myself before I raise my eyebrows at Henrik. "Don't fuck this up, Even. Got to impress me." I grin. 

Henrik cocks one eyebrow back at me, smirking; "Well, don't check me out too hard, Valtersen." He squeezes my hip and moves away.

I let out a light laugh as I move towards the doors. Closing my eyes, i remind myself that Isak hasn't kissed Even yet. The almost kiss just happened and this is his first time seeing him.  
I pull Isak out instantly.  
Opening my eyes, I adjust my olive green jacket and smooth out my snapback free hair.

_Two can play this game._

\---

"Please never cut your hair."

I roll my eyes and look up at Henrik from my position with my head on his lap. "No promises. Maybe I'll shave it off one day."

He mock gasps. "The horror!" Then chuckles and continues pulling his fingers through it as I turn back to my TV.

After filming, (which took 6 different takes cos Henrik couldn't get the damn locker to open; much to everyone's amusement) Henrik left for work while I went to my classes and then filmed a scene with Iman. Henrik had sent me a text during the day, asking to come over to mine tonight. Which worked out better for me, as my mum has been raising her eyes at me a little too much with my lack of sleeping at home.  
Henrik brought over some takeaway and we lounged out on my bed; watching a movie.

"Oh guess what?" I suddenly remember and move to look up at him, only to find him already staring down at me, a fond smile on his face.

He recovers quickly and raises his eyebrows questionly."Yeah?"

I swallow to hopefully stop my sudden blush, "Uh, Iman told me that Julie revealed to her that she's going to be the main for season 4."

"Serr?!"

"Yeah! She was stoked." 

"That's fantastic! She'll do so well. Her story could touch a lot of topics the world needs to hear." Henrik states. 

I nod. "I agree. She said Julie's going to sit down with her and a bunch of her Muslim friends during the hiatus and have them help write the plotlines." I roll back towards the TV. "Or something like that."

Henrik's hand stills for a moment before resuming through my hair. "Hmm. Wow yeah! I'm excited to see how Julie is going to go about that."

We finish the movie in a comfortable silence. I almost fall asleep on Henriks lap multiple times, but every time I feel myself drift off, Henrik pulls on my hair and it shoots fire down my spine. By the time the credits were rolling and I turn off the console with the remote; the sexual tension was thick. I could feel Henriks breath over me.

Suddenly he tugs my hair in a way that has me scrambling up and straddling his lap within seconds.  
He smirks at me, keeping his hand tight in my hair and his other pressing against my lower back.

"Hey boyfriend." He murmurs, his lips ghosting over mine.

I lean away slightly, "I haven't kissed you today, have I?" I can't help but tease.

Henrik laughs softly. "Thank god you noticed. I was trying to be subtle." He pushes me closer, our chest touching, lips millimeters apart.

"Subtle as a damn elephant." I graze my mouth against his jaw. 

"Will you fucking kiss me already?!" Henrik all but whines, his hands pressing deeper into my skin. 

I smirk, I'm enjoying this. "No ones stopping you, boyfriend."

He pauses. "I'm not going to give in to you." He leans away, a bit; mischief in his eyes.

Raising an eyebrow, "I'm not either." Fucker. 

Henrik lets out a chuckle and loosens his hands, "Are we really going to be like this?"

I move my hands down his arms before settling them at my side. "You're the one who started it." My competitive side is coming out, there's no way i'm making the first move now.  
I move off of his lap and settle down on my bed next to him; before looking back up. "What? Did you think I would take the bait?"

He looks down at me almost incredulously before laying down as well. "Well fuck. I have some regrets."

Laughing, I turn and face him. "Consider this karma, H." I reach out and move the hair off of his forehead. "Hey, we have the day off tomorrow; we should try and practice our underwater kiss."

"Oh yeah that's this Friday. Shit. We should. I don't want to mess it up." He rolls and lays on his side, facing me. He grasps one of my hands in his and intertwines them, letting them fall between us.

I bite my lip to hide my growing smile. "Yeah. Yeah I don't either. Kind of another big Isak and Even moment."

Henrik hums. "Probably one of the biggest so far." He pulls my hand to his mouth and places a soft kiss to it. 

I nod in agreement and we let silence fall over us in my darkening room.  
I let my mind take over.  
Lying here on my bed, holding hands with Henrik. It all just feels so normal. So comfortable. I'm still getting used to it. It still catches me of guard... But what's more is how it doesn't at the same time. How I sometimes don't even think twice over the fact that I can kiss him and touch him. How that I sometimes forget that other people are in the room when he's there.  
How I sometimes forget that I don't really own him.  
'You do though.' His words ring out in my mind. That should've settled my mind. And in a sense, it did. But fuck, it almost makes it worse. Makes what i'm feeling escalate.

I'm speeding down this track with no breaks, and when the season ends, I'll most likely crash.

_Chill out. Don't think about all of that yet._

I really need to get ahold of myself.

"Henrik?" I whisper, desperate for more of his touch.

I'm met with the sounds of his deep breaths. Henrik must've fallen asleep.

I smile and lean over, pressing my lips against his gently before laying back down, our hands still tangled together.  
I let out a content sigh as I close my eyes.

"You win." I whisper before welcoming asleep.

\---

The least they could've done was warm the damn pool up.  
I shiver as I step into the pool and look around the water to see where Henrik got too.

Suddenly he burst up from under the water. "Fuck! Its cold." He flips his hair off of his face and swims towards me.

"What were you doing?" I ask.

Henrik stands as his feet touch the bottom. "Trying to see how long I can hold my breath."

I roll my eyes in fondness. "Isn't that what i'm supposed to be master of?" I grin.

"And yet here I am, wet from head to toe, and you're still half dry." He smirks at me. "Where's your commitment to Isak here?"

"Um excuse me, Even is the extra one. Isak got dragged into this." 

Henrik splashes water at me. "Sure. Whatever you say."

I flip him off and take a breath before plunging myself under the water.  
Once under, I open my eyes.  
The pool is so clear, I could see to the otherside of the pool edge perfectly. The colour was a beautiful mixed shade of blue and green.  
It was perfect.

I admit i'm nervous about this scene. Isaks and Evens first kiss. And naturally, it happens in the most epic way ever. Underwater.  
I knew I had to nail this. Get across exactly how isak is feeling underwater with just the emotions on my face.

Isak is terrified. Terrified from the moment where he doesn't know how much clothing to take off. So he pushes Even in. Terrified that he's in a pool, alone, with Even. Terrified when he see's Even swimming closer to him under the water. Terrified when he kisses him back.

I rise and break through the surface. Wiping the water from my face, I see Henrik leaning against the edge of the pool. Staring at nothing, getting into his zone. Julie is putting the waterproof on the cameras.

I swim over to the stairs and sit down. My wet, grey long sleeve shirt billowing out as the water laps around me. I find the movement soothing as I close my eyes.  
Henrik and I had rehearsed this on Wednesday at his parent's swimming pool. We go down. Play around for a moment before Even leans in to kiss Isak. After resurfacing, and going back under, its Isaks turn. And we resurface together.

I'm the most nervous for when its Isaks turn to kiss Even. The shattering of his walls that he had built up all come down at that moment. He somehow finds that inner bravery; that strength to let go and let himself have this. Lets himself be in this moment of happiness, not knowing where it'll end up. 

My eyes open with a snap and I almost gasp.

_What the fuck._

My eyes find his blue ones instantly. And to my surprise, they're fixed straight at me.  
He nods at me and half smiles before swimming over.

"You alright?" Henrik sits next to me.

I nod. Not trusting myself to speak right at this moment but giving him a smile.

My mind is racing. Diving into Isak's thoughts just almost singlehandedly solved my own. Taste of my own characters medicine.  
What the fuck.

I feel my heartbeat stutter as I feel his hand on my knee, giving it a squeeze."You're going to be great, Tarjei. It's going to turn out amazing."

He moves to swim away but I grab his hand and hold it. "Thank you." I mutter out.

Henrik smiles warmly at me and rubs his thumb over my hand before pulling away to help Anthony, our cameraman, into the water with the now-waterproofed camera. I stare at them for a moment longer before moving towards to help out as well.

\---

We did both underwater sequences twice. Julie had to film with a specific filter and we had to move a bit faster so that in post editing, it'll be slowed down.  
Henrik ended up swallowing a lot of water, and he almost hit a camera with his hand. My shirt kept riding up and my hair was everywhere; but with all of these challenges...it was perfect.

Henrik and I created a new chapter with Isak and Evens relationship with this scene. We brought our natural chemistry and all of our emotions into those kisses. Henrik bringing desperation and elation that he got to finally kiss Isak. Me, bringing shock that someone would even want to kiss Isak, let alone the boy he's crushing on; and an almost relief. Relief that yes, this feels right. A confirmation that Isak is gay; that kissing Even feels the most right it ever has been in his life.

Walking toward the tram, Henrik and I are silent. Comfortably so. Both of us coming down from the high of the scene we just shot.  
Our arms keep brushing against one another and my thought go back to my own revelation in the pool.

_Let yourself have this. Allow yourself this happiness, no matter how brief._

I steal a breath and on our next arm swing, I grasp Henriks hand, threading our fingers together.

Henrik looks down in slight surprise, then brings up our hands and kisses the back of mine. "This is nice."

I flush as I see the happiness spread across his face. "Mmm. It is."

Henrik drops our hands back between us and we continue on, a spring to both our steps. Then he looks back over to me. "I have a question, please don't get offended."

I raise my eyebrow. "Okay? I'm sure I wont." 

"In the pool," He starts out. "After we resurface and start kissing..." He trails off and takes a little breath. "You kissed me...well, differently. Different than how you usually do."

I stare at him for a moment before a laugh bursts out of me. Henrik looks on with an intrigued look as I calm myself down enough to answer. "Oh man..sorry but the way you asked that was hilarious." I squeeze his hand and smile at the ground. "Funny that you noticed too." A warmth spread through my chest.

Henrik huffs out a laugh. "Well of course I noticed, I was trying to get some heat going and you were locked down." He nudges my shoulder with a grin.

"I should've discussed this with you, to 'warn' you." I raise my head and meet his eyes. "But Isak isn't well versed in kissing, especially not kissing someone who he WANTS to kiss. So yeah, he's going to be closed off for a bit. Plus this was their first kiss, he was nervous. Give the kid a break." I laugh as I see Henrik roll his eyes.

"Jeez, yeah a heads up would be nice. So that I don't like...eat your face next time or something." We arrive at the stop and Henrik releases my hand to place his two on my waist, turning me to face him.

I take a half step closer to him and wrap my arms around his neck.  
Henrik brings up a hand and caresses my cheek.

Fuck it. I raise up and attach our lips, moving my mouth against his surprised one. I drag away. "Is this better?" I smirk. 

Henrik groans. "Tarjei." He mutters, glancing around the deserted tram stop. "Jodel." He reminds me.

I smile, knowing my gapped teeth are on full display as I lean into him. Our chests touching, I tangle my fingers into the back of his hair as I nose at his jaw before raising green to connect with blue. "Henrik." I breathe, "I really don't give a fuck. Please kiss me."  
And even though we were the only people at this stop; we missed the tram.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay okay I know, this isn't my best chapter I'm sorryldskfasklj  
> its one that just kinda sets up future events.  
> also soz that its a bit short, but i'm writing the next one now and it's a fun one. 
> 
> "KLINE KLINE" anyone?
> 
> itll be up this weekend. I wanted to give you two chapters to make up for lack of one last week.
> 
> Thank you.
> 
> -V


	10. The First Time It Happens: Henrik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> halloo.
> 
> Just a quick thank you to everyone's incredibly kind comments you lot say to me.  
> On here and on twitter. I honestly started this fic for me and some mutuals..I didn't think a lot of people would read it.
> 
> but you all make me smile, so massive thank you. Truly. xxx
> 
> also; I was asked if I was going to include Lea in my fic. And no. I'm not. I'm diverting from that canon and throwing in my own thing later.
> 
> anyway, I had fun with this one. Lemme know your thoughts!
> 
> Enjoy. xx  
> -V

"Henrik honey?"

The sound of my mother, Siv's, voice snaps me out of my thoughts.  
I look over where she's sitting at her kitchen island counter; looking at fonts for the menus at her new restaurant.

She smiles, the skin around her blue eyes crinkling, "Where are you at today?"

I chuckle. "Sorry mum. I'm here. What was it you asked?"

"I was just commenting that the reviews for the end of episode 2 were really positive. Except some were a bit upset that Even kissed Sonja so fiercely in front of Isak." She winks at me.

I can't help but roll my eyes in fondness. I swear my mother is more obsessed with this show that I am.  
And I couldn't have asked for a better supporter.

"It's in the script." I mutter. "But that's cool. I haven't had the chance to read the reviews yet."

A comfortable silence fills the room as she resumes looking at the papers in front of her.  
My mind trails back to this morning.

Waking up next to a warm and soft Tarjei.  
Well, waking up to find him already looking at me; his green eyes were tracing over my body before locking with mine.

A wide smile begins to form on my face and I turn away from my mum to grab a glass and fill it at the sink.  
As I turn the water on, I watch it for a moment. I place my hand underneath the pressure as I remember the feel of the shower this morning.

Hot pelts of water hitting my back; my hair in my eyes as I looked down at Tarjei on his knees in front of me. His tight, warm mouth enclosed around my swollen cock; sliding up and down, tongue flicking the slit. His eyes were luminous as they looked up to connect with mine while his strong hands gripped my hips, leaving bruises.  
Bruises that I feel now as I press against the sink counter.  
Fuck. I can still feel his breath against my skin as he took me so deep into his-

"What are you doing?"

I jump and drop the glass of water into the sink, cursing.

Siv leans over and turns the water off before leaning against the counter as well, eyebrow cocked.  
Guess who I got that trait from.

"Sorry, I wasn't paying attention." I say as I right the glass.

"Clearly." She answers, amused. "That cup was overflowing with water and you didn't even take a drink."

I shrug and move across the lean against the kitchen island, now facing directly across form her.  
I know her well enough that she's in detective mode. I know her little games.  
I enjoy playing them.

I close-mouth smile at her. "Decided I wasn't thirsty."

She nods, as though my answer was good enough when we both know it wasn't.  
"Mm, I see. Hungry then?" She asks, feigning innocence.

"Not really." I try to keep my voice even.

She stares at me for a moment longer before tilting her head up and plastering a wide smile across her face. "Well then!" She moves off the counter and walks back to her spot on the tall stool. "I shall continue my work."

I narrow my eyes at her before walking around towards her, slowly. "That's it?" I question, not fully convinced.

"What's it, sweetie?" She pops her head back up, grinning.

This time I cock my eyebrow at her. And we just look into our same coloured eyes until I break first and burst into laughter.

"Alright mum, you win." I lean over the countertop. "What?"

Siv picks up her pencil and starts going over the papers. "Nothing. I just wanted to see you sweat. A mother needs to do this from time to time to make sure she still can get things out of you." She looks up and winks as I let out another snort.

"Sure sure mum. Whatever you say." I lean over and place a kiss on the top of her head. Pulling away, I snatch an apple out of the fruit basket and head towards their tv room.

I'm almost to the doorway when I hear her next words.

"Haven't seen Tarjei for a bit." 

I pause before turning around and raising my eyebrow. "You saw him Wednesday. We came and went swimming? He literally stayed for dinner." I let out a laughing huff. "That was three days ago mum."

I watch as her eyes trace over my face before she smiles so wide her eyes almost shut. "I suppose that's true. But I miss him. He's such a nice young man. Good head on his shoulders. Plus he seems comfortable around us." She turns back to her work. "And he's quite handsome."

Subtle as a damn lorry.  
Guess another trait I must've picked up from her.

I let out a groan and spin back to head into the tv room.  
As I settle on the sofa, watching the game between my younger brother and his dad; I swear I could hear her still smiling in the kitchen.

\---

_Tarjei: Hey! There's a party tonight. Want to go?_

**Is this a date? Are you asking me?**

I smile, knowing he'll roll his eyes at that.

_Tarjei: Nevermind :) I don't want you to come._

**NOOO! :( I'm sorry, forgive me. I'll buy you beer.**

_Tarjei: Shut up. Just come. Should be fun. It's a 3rd year party._

**Wow. Look at you.**

**Is this why you want me to come? For you to bring your attractive older friend to help you get your prestige?**

_Tarjei: Seriously, why are you like this?_

_Tarjei: We've been friends for almost two months..but..should I be concerned?_

I let out a laugh and my brother shushes me; I ignore him.

**Probably. I would.**

**Okay. 3rd year party. Sounds great! When and where?**

_Tarjei: Oh I thought we could go together?_

_Tarjei: I mean you did straight up offer to buy me beer so..._

**I had a moment of weakness.**

**But yeah aright! Meet at your house? Do I need to bring beer for your friends?**

_Tarjei: Nah, They'll meet us there. They've got their own thing going on._

My heart stuccos. I give a little smile at my phone, , _okay Isak._

_Tarjei: Just come to my house at 20. The party isn't far and we can just walk._

**Can't wait!**

_Tarjei: :)_

**So how is your Saturday going?**

_Tarjei: Well after a GREAT morning; I went home and slept for a bit and now i'm at the gym._

The heat spreads over my chest.

**Pssh, your morning didn't top MY morning, I bet.**

_Tarjei: You're right. Mine was way better._

I let out an offended gasp and I feel a kick to my leg as my brother shushes me again and leans forward; his eyes glued to the screen

**Excuse me.**

**I give amazing blow jobs.**

**You just suck at receiving them**

_Tarjei: Sure Henrik. Sure. I'll admit that I'm the better sucker._

I feel my cock give a slight twitch as flashes of this morning hit the front of my mind again.

**K but really T, wow. This morning was...wow. Fucking amazing.**

_Tarjei: Stop. I'm at the gym remember?_

**Ugh. Fine.**

**Also that sounds awful.**

_Tarjei: Fuck you. The gym is great._

_Tarjei: You should come sometime_

**Absolutely not.**

_Tarjei: Why not?!_

**I don't need to.**

_Tarjei: Come on, There's so much to do! Like classes and stuff. Not all just boring free weights._

**Eh...**

_Tarjei: Come with me_

I grin. Oh he is just too damn easy.

**I did.**

**Twice.**

_Tarjei: What the fuck._

_Tarjei: Fuck off._

**:)**

_Tarjei: You're being very Even today._

**Well good, because you're my Isak.**

_Tarjei: Wow. That was cheesy. I'm ending this conversation._

**No! Boyfriend don't leave me!**

_Tarjei: Shut up. You're fine._

_Tarjei: But really, I'll see you at 20?_

**Alright alright fiiiine. Yes, I'll see you then!**

_Tarjei: :)_

**:)**

I click off my phone. The grin on my face too obvious to go unnoticed.

"Date tonight?"

I look over at my younger brother. "Um..no?..Yes? Not really?" I run a hand through my hair. "Why?"

Mathias shrugs. "You just had your flirting smile on." Then he lets out a yell and claps hands with his dad as their team scores on the tv. 

I lean back and burrow deeper into the sofa cushions.  
Flirting. Do we even flirt? Would it be called flirting when it comes to us? Its just so natural. Our flow with each other. I just respond to him so easily and quickly, like second nature. It's like my heart and my mind finally got their shit together and are now doing things in perfect harmony. Its exquisite.

My phone pings in my hand and a slow smile spreads as I read the message across my lock screen.

_Tarjei: I'm really excited for tonight. I can't wait to see you._

\---

The bass is pounding by the time we get to the house. Both of us already 2 beers in from drinking at his house.  
I glance around at the people loitered about the front lawn; at couples making out against the side of the house. 

Tarjei looks over at me. "Already looks lit."

I wink at him and he smiles before leading us into the crowd of bodies.  
I scan the tops of the sea of heads before I spot Tarjei's group of friends.

I place my hand on his back and lean down close to his ear. "Youre friends are over against that wall, do you want to head over there?" I feel him shiver as my breath tickels his neck and I hide my smirk.

He nods, "Are you going to come with me?"

This time, I do grin at him before leaning even closer. "Of course. This is a date right?"

Tarjei rolls his eyes and lightly pushes me. Then he turns and heads into the swarm of bodies, towards his friends.

I make my way behind him, trying to be as gentle as possible when moving people out of my way to scoot pass them. Suddenly a body shoves into me.

"What the fuck-"

"Henkeee! I didn't know you'd be herrre!" My mate Alex wobbles in front of me, making me stop and lose sight of Tarjei.

_Chill, you'll find him in a bit._

I smile easily at my friend. "Yeah, whats up man?"

"Nothing dude nothing. I never see you anymoreee." He tilts into me and I place my hand on his shoulder to steady him.

"Been busy. Shit dude, how much have you had to drink?" I ask him.

Alex shrugs. "Eh. Dunno. A shot or 6. Can't rememberrrr. Hey! Let's go get you a beer!." He slurs.

"Alex!"

I turn and see the girl I danced with, Lara, come out of the crowd and grab onto Alex's arm.

"The fuck! I told you to stay put!" She grumbles.

Shit. Shit. Shit. I had forgotten that I kinda just left her on the dance floor. But yet again, its not like we did anything.

"Uh hey, Lara." Better to go with friendly.

"Hey Henrik." She barely flicks her eyes at me before focusing back on Alex. "Cmon, let's go get you some water."

I clear my throat. "I'm sorry for sortof leaving without saying anything the other weekend." I reach up and scratch the back of my head. "I got distracted."

Lara shrugs, still trying to get Alex to move. "Whatever. It's fine." Her voice cold.

I nod, not knowing what to say.

"Oh my god! HENRIK!" Alex looks back up to me, his eyes wide and pupils dialated. "Heyyyy! I saw you on the tv!" He all but yells.

I quickly look around before realising people were hardly paying us attention.  
I half-smile at him. "Yeah mate, i'm sure you did."

At that moment, I feel his eyes and I turn to my left to see Tarjei gazing at me, once again surrounded by his friends. Only this time, he smiles and jerks his head for me to come over.

I give him a reassuring full smile before turning back to my drunk friend. "I'm gonna go now but come find me later alright? Go drink some water." 

Lara rolls her eyes and starts pulling Alex towards the kitchen while he babbles on. "Henkeeee but he likes you! He likess you and you have a stupid girlfriend! Poor Isak." He mumbles as Lara drags him away.

I let out a breath and make my original path towards the one person I really want to be here with.

\---

I almost should've expected this. Between Alex's comments earlier, and the fact that a few people have come up to David, Tarjei and I. I guess you could say I'm not surprised when it first gets brought up.

"Henrikkkk mate!" Alex and Lara had found and joined our ever-growing group some bit ago.  
Tarjei was another beer in, and slowly becoming adorably tipsy. I decided to stay sober, wanted to be alert to look out for all these boys. 

I face him and grin. "Hey buddy, how you doing?"

Great! So so great! HEY!" He places a hand on my shoulder and points to Tarjei. "Heyy its Isak!"

I resist rolling my eyes. Alex has been saying this at least three times now. 

Tarjei laughs. "Yup! That I am!" He raises his Tuborg and takes a drink.

"Waitttt. and you're-you're Even!" Alex shouts in my face.

My annoyance grows but I force my smile on my face. "Yes I am."

He's quiet for a moment and I return my attention back on the conversation the boys were having about the lastest football match.  
I had almost forgotten he was standing by me when he yells out.

"OH my god! And you guys kiss right? You two should make out right noww!"

I snap my head up to see Tarjei's mouth dropped open, his fingers tight around his drink. Yeah, no this isn't happening.  
I open my mouth to shut this idea down when David gasps.

"Dudes! Fuck! Tj you guys totally should!" He bumps Tarjei with his shoulder.

What the fuck David.

I look at him in disbelief. "Uh nei??" I manage to coherent out.

"What? Whyy? Cmon man!" Alex whines next to me.

Why? Maybe because Tarjei looked petrified at the idea. And maybe because Tarjei and I have never kissed in front of anyone really, let alone a giant crowd. The only time we're public is in front of the cameras; and even then we're Isak and Even, not Henrik and Tarjei. 

I meet Tarjei's glowing emeralds, trying to assess how he's feeling.  
He matches my gaze. I see him take a deep breath, then a smile forms on his lips. He tilts his head up and winks, WINKS!

Dick.

"TJ! You have to man!" His friend Rumen jumps in. "If it's like what we saw at that party; fuuuuck dude. You're going to get chicks and guys all over you."

Great. That's just what I want Rumen, to show the entire world how fucking hot he is, thanks. Arsehole. 

Tarjei breaks and smirks at him before turning back to me. "I mean..." He trails off, taking another sip of his beer. "Maybe.."

The hell?  
I can't believe that he's even considering this.  
Okay okay. I feel my blood rush and I bite my lip.

It's not that I don't want to, because fuck Tarjei looks so damn fit tonight so obviously I do. I just don't want to get carried away, and I don't want Tarjei to regret it later.

"Bro! Come on! It'd be so hot. Your chemistry onscreen is insanneee." Alex slurs next to me.

Suddenly everyone is talking over the other.

"Yeah! Fuck you guys really should!"

"Do it!"

"So hot!"

"Show them what true acting takes!"

_True acting. Riiight._

Then the chanting starts.

"Make out!"

"Make out!

"Make out!

People are starting to tune into our little commotion and they catch on; once they realise who we were, and the chanting gets even louder.

I can feel my face start to flame and I try to look anywhere I could but-  
I feel his stare and we lock eyes.  
I take a deep breath, and raise my eyebrows.

_You sure?_

Tarjei give me a little half-smile, and nods.

The butterflies erupt.  
Here we go.

Tarjei hands his beer to Jakob and walks closer to me.

All of a sudden I realise that we are standing in the middle of a ring formed of drunken boys and girls, chanting round us.

I feel the sweat on my brow as I scan their faces. It feels like everyone at this damn party is looking at us.  
Chanting, chanting, chanting.

"Hey boyfriend.

His quiet voice flows through me and I calm down immediately. I take another deep breath and look down to meet his eyes.  
His face is lit up, beaming, completely at ease.

I let out a laugh. "How are you not freaking out right now?"

Tarjei takes a step closer to me and the cheering around us get even louder.

"I am. I'm fucking screaming on the inside."

"T.." I smile. "Are you sure you want to do this?" I take a calculated step towards him and our chests touch. "I don't want you to feel pressured or-"

"I've never wanted to kiss you so fucking bad than right now."

And its like time slows down; all the bodies around us begin moving in slow motion. Their voices fading to background as Tarjei leans up, grasps the back of my head and connects our mouths.

Fire explodes through my body as I feel his lips move against mine. I slide my palm across his neck to the back of his hair and lightly tug. I'm met with the sofest groan, only meant for my ears which I swallow up gratefully.  
Licking his bottom lip, Tarjei opens up his mouth to allow my tongue to stroke inside. I bring my other hand up to his face and glide my thumb across his cheek, forcing his mouth to open wider. His hand curls into my hair, roughly, and the other grips at my waist.  
Our mouths moving together in that familiar dance of ours.

I had all but forgotten where we were when I feel him start to pull back.  
And once we disconnect and I open my eyes; every sound came rushing to my ears.

"HOLY SHIT!"

"What the fuck?!"

"DId you see that?"

"Fuck! That's Isak and Even man!"

"Did anyone record that?"

That last comment I hear jerks me out of my tracne and I snap my head to look at Tarjei. He sends a worried glance towards his friends and they all shake their heads reassuringly at him.

Okay, so no one filmed that; thank god.

The crowd disperses and the party resumes. We're left alone, thankfully forgotten.  
I'm still trying to have control over my breathing and body when Alex stumbles into me.

"Holy shit dude! I've neverrr seen you kiss like that before! EVER!" He throws an arm around me. "Teach me your wayysss.!"

I see Lara trying to grasp onto his arm. She meets my eyes and it's like ice shoots down my spine.

"Lets go Alex" She spits and roughly tugs him from me, holding on to him as steady as she can as they make way across the room. 

"The fuck is her problem?"

I spin to find Tarjei standing next to me, glaring at where they disappeared to.

I run a hand through my tousled hair and chuckle. "That's Lara. She's the girl I, um, left on the dance floor to come find you."

Tarjei bursts into laugher and faces me. "I thought she looked vaguely familiar. That's freaking hilarious though." He cocks his head at me. "You disappointed about it?"

"Not even remotely." I smirk at him. "I got something much much better."

Tarjei rolls his eyes but i know under these dark lights, a blush is making its way across his face.

"I'm thinking of heading home. Join me?" He asks.

I nod and he turns to head towards the front door.  
I follow him. I would go wherever as long as I was with him.

\---

"And oh god you should've seen Shauns face! His mouth was clear on the floor." Tarjei laughs. "They kept going on and on about my appeal and our chemistry. Then David's standing there all smug like he made the entire thing happen or whatever."

I let out a laugh at that. "Well, he definitely got the ball rolling."

Tarjei peaks at me before snapping his head back forward down the road. "And you're alright? That we did...that?" I hear his hesitancy.

"Yeah of course! Like I said, I was just more worried that you were feeling pressured. I know how you value your privacy." I smile, hoping my words were putting him at ease.

I see him visibly relax before chuckling, 2 dimples showing. "Thanks for that. But yeah, it was fine. I was okay with us doing that." He glances over to me. "Do you think that will happen every time we're at a party together.?"

I let out a fake huff. "Only if our friends are there, as backward as that sounds."

Tarjei erupts into laughter, throwing his head back. His neck veins protruding and I feel my cock twitch in my trousers.

He was just so fucking attractive. Not only the physical parts; with his sandy curls and cut jawline. His cupid bow shaped lips and his sharp collarbones. No no, not only that. But the other parts as well.  
He was well beyond his age. Whenever he and I get into a discussion about something, he amazes me with his intellect and knowledge. His passions, fuck. I could hear him speak about how each nail in a theatre stage is created for hours on end and be completely content.  
He just lights up. His entire being. Whether it's about his new pair of shoes or some wordly issue he's concerned about; it fills him. Fills him up to the brim and its all I can do to hopefully feel some of his light spill onto me.

I want to give him everything because he deserves everything. This boy has churned my world upside down. I always want to be near him, long for his voice; see his breathtaking smile.

But how? I'm doing the best I can to just hang on. Keep up with what he and I have.  
Yet i'm the older one; I'm the one that should be putting all of this into perspective. And at the beginning, I did.

'Act however we choose to or feel when we're together.' and 'Whatever is between you and I, is just for you and I.'

And well, didn't that kinda fuck me over? I mean, it's solid advice I guess, letting us become comfortable around each other...but..he takes up my mind, always. Whether i'm with him or not.  
How am I suppose to just live moment to moment with what we have in those times? How do I just turn it off when the cameras shut down and we part for the day, before always returning to one of our beds at night? How do I just kiss him when all I want is to throw him on my bed and push into him hard and deep; his hands clawing at my back, his body arching against my chest as he screams out my name-

"Henrik?" A hand waves in front of me. A laugh breaks through.

"You alright there, bro?" Tarjei grins.

I look around and see that we've reached his house, and we're standing on the side of it; in the shadows near the door to the basement.

I force out a breathy laugh. "Sorry yeah. Lost in my mind for a bit there."

"Mmm, obviously." Tarjei searches my face before shifting his eyes away quickly.

I furrow my brow. "Whats up?"

"Nothing." His reponse is too quick.

"Tarjei." 

He seems nervous, and its making my skin prickle with goosebumps.

Tarjei shuffles his feet, staring at the ground. After a beat, he speaks. "I...I um. Well, we start filming episode 5 tomorrow"

"Yes?" I question, wondering where he's going to go with this.

He brings his head up and looks towards his house, still not meeting my eyes. "I think that.. well, I mean I've been thinking that maybe it'd be a good idea to....I dunno." He trails off.

I let out an exasperated breath. "Tarjei for fucks sake, just tell me-"

"I think it'd be for the best if we, like, limit our time together these next 2 weeks." His words coming out fast. And finally he faces me, worry written all over.

"Limit our time together?" What.

Tarjei nods. "Uh, yeah. I just thought, because of how episode 5 and 6 go, that it would be-that it would maybe show in my acting. Us not, being near each other." He shrugs, looking down again. "I dunno. I'm fucking this up. Maybe there's no logic behind it but.." He suddenly straightens up and faces me fully, eyes green and clear. "This is what I feel I need to do, to feel what Isak's going through a bit."

Warmth spreads throughout my body at his words.  
Oh this boy. This sweet caring boy.

"Tarjei.." I take a step closer to him. "I think this is a great idea."

"Yeah?"

I nod, vehemently. "Yes. If this is what you want do to, I wholeheartedly support it."

Tarjei blushes, looking away towards the door. "Thanks, Henrik." He mutters.

"Hey." I open my arms and gently tug him to me, burying my face in his shoulder. "This is your season, Isaks season. You know him better than anyone. If this is how you feel; to get the emotions you want, do it." I lean back and search his face. "You've got this. We can do this, easy. It's not like we see each other every day now anyway."

He grins and raises a brow. "Just every night."

I chuckle. "Well, we're big kids. We can handle it."

I push aside all my aches in my thoughts. If Tarjei wants this, let him do this.

Reaching out, I caress his cheek. "All for Skam."

Tarjei leans into my touch, closing his eyes. "For Isak and Even."

"For Isak and Even." I repeat softly. 

He opens his eyes and give me his beautiful, almost rare, 3 dimple smile.

My heart thumps loudly in my chest as I can't help myself but lean down and gently press my lips against his.  
We hold for a moment all to short before breaking away.

We gaze into the others eyes for a solid minute before both of us cracking out into laughter.

"Fuck, why are we like this?" I giggle, my eyes squinting with how wide I'm smiling.

"Sappy as shit." Tarjei responds.

We take a step back from each other at the same time; and I start backing away slowly.

"See you tomorrow thought?" Tarjei calls.

I salute him as I gain more distance between us. "See you tomorrow, boyfriend."

I hear his laugh as I reach the road and make my way towards the bus stop.  
A smile spreading.

Wow. 2 weeks apart. A part of me absolutely loathes this; but the other doesn't, its more excited. I'm almost mad that I didn't think of it. Because yeah, Isak goes through a lot this week, specially towards the end. And then his journey in ep6 before his coming out to Jonas.  
Of course he needs to be away from me. Because that's what Even is doing; he's forcing himself away from Isak.  
So this works perfectly, in a way. I need to take this time to channel the emotions Even will be going through.

While also proving to myself that I can, and will be fine without Tarjei.  
When all of this ends.


	11. The Heartbreak: Tarjei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY
> 
> For those of you who dont follow me on twitter; my laptop took a shit earlier this week and I wasnt able to recover anything from the memory or hardrive. So i lost everything. All my photos and videos throughout the years. And then all of my outlines and parts of prewritten chapters.  
> So I took a couple of days to feel sorry for myself.  
> and then i 'stole' my mates laptop. :)
> 
> So i'm back! I'm in the process of buying a new laptop so bear with me.  
> I had to rewrite this entire chapter.
> 
> APOLOGIES THOUGH! The timing was horrible!
> 
> Okay, couple of things:  
> I just wanted to point out that I dont cover EVERY Evak scene in this fic. Only ones that are going to pertain or flow with my lil storyline i have.  
> So if/when i dont mention one; its fine. Just assume its happened in the days seperating scenes.
> 
> also: I'm adding things to the tag. just heads up.  
> also also: I FINALLY went back and rewrote the smut scenes in the previous chapters to be in 1stPOV. I like it much better. Its bascially the same scene just written better.. (Seriously, who let me publish those disasters?)
> 
> annnnd(and i dunno if you want me to tell you or not) but these next few will be a tiny bit angsty.  
> If you want me to warn you before the chapter, please let me know.
> 
>  
> 
> one last thing; i just want to reiterate that yes, i do ship Henjei. BUT i fully respect Henrik and Tarjei and their private lives. Their sexuality is their business, and should they choose to share, i would support them endlessly with whatever they say.  
> Whatever they have between them is their business. I fully support that Henrik has a gf and i respect all involved. I would never force my opinions on them or attack any of the people in their lives just because of my 'ship'.  
> This fic is honestly just for self indulgence.
> 
> You're all so wonderful. Thank you for your kind comments. It hit me the other day just how many people read this?  
> like... my twitter crushes reads this and yeah. laskdjf
> 
> im snapbackskam on twitter.  
> love you all.  
> x  
> V

I guess in hindsight, telling Henrik that we need to take it easy then winding up in a bed with with him, less than 12 hours later, filming cuddle scenes; probably wasn't the best idea.

But maybe this could be good. Get our fix in...get Isak's fix in before it goes to shit.

It's just that Henrik pulled out all the goddamn cuteness today. Or well, Even did.  
Laying there with the Jesus shirt and the blue hoodie. Hair a soft mess and his familiar scent of fresh leather and cigarettes clinging to his skin.

And Even.

Even was being so caring. So protective.  
Isak had never felt safer, never more relaxed in years.  
He was starved. He hadn't been touched with such honestly and love in so long. Almost every single wall dropped down, the only one still erect was the one involving his parents. Isak let Even in. Fully. Let Even caress him and kiss him and shower him with care.  
Let's himself give into what he truly desires. Let's himself start telling his mind that this is okay. Kissing a boy is okay. Isak finally opens up, shows someone the real him. Parallel universes and all.

And laying in bed with Henrik's hands soothing and pressing into my skin; it was hard to not forget myself.

"I can't believe I have to say this, but please stop kissing." Julie's voice filters from behind the camera. "Seriously, you're kissing too much and too loudly. Savour this moment guys, go slower."

Henrik whines as we pull apart. "Kiss me normally."

I let out a laugh. "Isak doesn't really know how to kiss, I told you. At least not kiss and actually mean it. This is his first time with a boy he cares about. He's learning."

"Ugh. When will HE kiss me normally then?"

Smiling, I reach out and rub my thumb over his bottom lip. "Hmm...maybe in a season or 2."

"For fucks sake-"

I cut him off with pressing my mouth on his.

The scene went flawlessly. We did several takes with different camera angles. We emphasised the words we wanted. Words we felt that were important. Emotions we needed to get across.  
And shotgunning the smoke quickly became a competition between Henrik and I; seeing who could make the other cough with this fake smoke spice shit we had to use. One time, Henrik sneezed during a take and his roll ashes fell over in his ear and almost burned him.

I couldn't stop laughing.  
Julie never stopped rolling.

\---

"Really really good product today my boys." Julie slaps each of us on the shoulder. I swear, if this woman of stone ever gave me a hug I would faint.

I roll my eyes. "Yeah yeah...'we make your life easier.'...'where would you be without us.'..We know."

"I ask myself daily why I cast you, you know." She shoots back, a coy smile around her lips.

A laugh huffs out of me. "Sure. I'm not singlehandedly carrying this season or anything." I wink at her.

This time she punches me. "God! Seriously smart arse!?" She grins.

"Ow!" I pretend to rub my arm in pain. "No need to get violent at hearing the truth."

Julie rolls her eyes and turns more towards Henrik, laughing. "Why do we put up with him?" 

I face him, eyebrows raised, prepared for him to have a snarky response.

Henrik beams down at me, his face full of fondness. "Because he's worth it." His voice sure.

My stomach fills with butterflies instantly. What the fuck?  
His words caught me off guard. I can't believe he said that? Outloud. And in front of someone.  
I feel the blush flooding my face and I look down at the ground.

"Well." Julie states, sounding proud. "This little exchange just makes me, once again, want to congratulate myself on such brilliant casting." She lifts her chin up in overexageration.

I raise my head up a bit to look at her and she fail attempts to wink at me.  
Letting out a groan, "Wow. Yup. Thanks, Julie."

Henrik copies my tone. "Yeah, thanks Julie."

Julie starts backing away. "You know, I love hating my stars." And flips us off with a bright smile before turning down the sidewalk to head to her car.

We both chuckle before simultaneously turning towards each other. Our matching movements making me grin.

Henrik smiles at me. "You were happy today."

I shrug, feeling that blush rise again. "It was a happy scene. Isak's moods affect my own sometimes."

"Mmm.." Henrik sounds out. His eyes shift, and I can tell he wants to say something else, but he clears his throat, clearly about to switch the conversation. "Today was fun." He takes a step closer to me.

"It was." I nod and mumble out, "Thank you."

Henrik tilts his head. "For what?"

I raise my hand up slightly. "I dunno. Just for Even. For how Even was today. Having him be so caring and soft with Isak."

"Well, in that case, you're welcome. And also thank YOU for having Isak trust Even enough to let him in." He takes one step closer to me and suddenly there's less than a sound wave between us.

My heart flutters. "You're welcome." I manage to mutter out.

The silence looms over us. Cars driving by as we stand next to the kollectiv building. It's mid morning on a Sunday and people are milling about. If we were smart, wed be metres apart, going our seperate ways. I know that we're getting looks. In the back of my mind it registers that we are probably getting recognised.

But right now, I couldn't care less.

Henrik's deep blue eyes trace over my face; emotions flitting across his features. His warm breath fanning my face with his every exhale.  
God, how I want to kiss him.

But I wont.

He see's it in my eyes, and so he's the first to break our spell. "I won't kiss you, don't worry." He murmers. "I just want to savour this right now."

Silence covers us again for another moment.

"It's all going to go to shit this week, Henrik." I whisper, my words almost getting lost in the wind.

Henrik nods, bringing up his hand to slot his fingers through my hair by my neck, his thumb slowly rubbing my cheek. His eyes flashing...guilt? It's gone before I get the chance to register it, with it being replaced by a half-smile.

"It is." He leans in to place his forehead against mine, and my eyes close. "But worth it, in the end. Okay? Remember."

I take in a deep breath, drinking in his touch. "Okay."

\---

"Wait really? For how long?" David asks, eyebrows raised.

I shrug and pick at my food on my tray. "I dunno, sometime after we film episode 6." I take a bite and glance around the crowded cafeteria.

Skam has been in the middle of episode 3 this week. The reviews and comments have been nothing short of raving. And i've been noticing that I've been gaining more of unwanted attention.  
Lingering glances in the hallways of people I don't know. Strangers staring at me on the street. Some even coming up to ask for a photo.  
Julie had informed me that more and more people online have been discovering and watching Skam. From several different countries.  
It's honestly mind blowing.  
So I've been choosing to ignore all of that somewhat. Keeping in my small bubble, for now.

I rarely talk about work at school now; but David and my friends have been pestering me about not seeing Henrik around, so I threw them a bone.

"Hmm. Guess that makes sense." David says. I nod, knowing that he's also read ep5 and ep6. He knew what Isak has facing him.

"Didn't you see him when you filmed this morning?" Rumen chimes in, taking a bite out of his pizza.

"Nah, that was just us boys." David answers for me. "Marlon, Sacha and I."

"So for real though? You're not going to hang out or see Henrik outside of work just because ISAK doesn't see him for awhile or whatever?"Alfred asks.

I want to roll my eyes. My friends never really ask about the plot lines or work in general, I mean, with them being the great friends that they are, but today they seem to be nosy and almost pushy.

"I'm not going to say anything except it's just what I need to do." I let out a huff and glare at them all. "Plus, we literally made out at that damn party this weekend. It's only been a few days, not the end of the world." I take a drink of my water bottle.

I see Shaun and Rumen open their mouths to speak but Jakob beats them to it. "Thats fine dude. Do whatever. I'm just stoked you'll maybe remember we exist now."

This time it feels like my eyes go clear back into my head as I'm bombarded with accusations and fake hurt from my mates.  
I swallow my water and lean forward to defend myself when I see a girl I dont know, approach our table.  
My body automatically stiffens. I know she's coming over to talk to me. David notices my stance immediately, pressing his knee against mine as a reassurance.

"HI!" She smiles at us before her eyes settle on me, her smile getting wider.

Of fucking course.

The guys all mutter hi as I give her a slight smile with a nod, taking her in.  
She's cute. Really cute actually. Long brown hair with...shit...blue eyes. Pert litle nose and shapely lips. Yeah, she normally would be right up my avenue.  
If I cared.  
If I even looked at anyone else lately.

She clears her throat. "Um...I'm really sorry to bother you, Tarjei..but.."She blushes and I brace myself, my fake smile firmly in place even though she knew my name and i've never spoken to her in my life. "Could...could I get a selfie with you?"

She looks at me so hopeful, eyes wide and she's fidgeting with the bands on her wrist.  
David presses back into me again, silently asking if I was comfortable; if they needed to intervene.

God, I love my friends sometimes. Always making sure I'm alright. They have had no issue telling people to fuck off for me.  
But....she's cute. I'll be nice today.

"Absolutely." I make sure to let my dimples show.

She beams at me, her white teeth glimmering. "Ah! Thank you!"

I stand up and she comes over to me. I put my arm around her shoulders as she puts one of hers around my waist, her hand near the pocket of my hoodie. She holds out her phone with the other and starts to snap a few photos.  
I put on my charming grin and hope that they turn out at least somewhat decent. My eyes take in the cafeteria; I hate that people could be watching this. I don't want others to think it's okay to approach me and expect me to take photos with them....or worse; they think i'm loving the attention.

We finish and she moves her hand across my waist closer to my hoodie pocket and...wow. She's good.

She gives me a flirty wink. "Thanks again. Maybe see you around?" And flounces away.

Sitting back down, I place my hand in my pocket, feeling the slim piece of paper that I'm 100% sure has a number or a note on it. Or both.

"Dudeee." Shaun lets out a whine.

I grab my crisps and place one in my mouth. "What?" I mumble out.

"Karly Langston? That gir! That was Karly! The new girl! I've only been ranting about her for weeks now." He stares at the doors she disappeared through.

Laughing, I pull out the paper in my pocket. "Oh really? Well then this will probably be more of use to you than with me." I set it on the table.

"No fucking way."

Rumen and Shaun scramble for it instantly. Shaun winning. He opens it and reads it outloud. " 'Hey Tarjei, Sorry if this is forward but wow I think you're so talented and hot.' " Shaun makes a choking sound and I throw a crisp at him before he continues. " 'Here's my number if you want to go grab a coffee somtime. But I'm also going to be at that revue party this weekend. See you there?' "

Shaun looks over at me. "I hate you sometimes."

I grin at him. "You love me. Look! I got the girl of your dreams phone number for you."

"Wait, you're not going to call her??" Alfred exclaims.

"Eh nei?? Why would I?" I finish the last of my crisps and crinkle the bag in my fist. "She's smooth though, I'll give her that."

"Dude." Rumen raises an eyebrow at me. "She's fucking hot."

"Yeah..so?"

"How do YOU not want to tap that?" He asks, almost disbelievingly.

I roll the crisp bag into a ball. "I just don't, okay? She's all yours, or Shauns. I don't care." The room suddenly feels too hot and I feel too many eyes on me.

"But-"

"Bro, chill. Let him do what he wants. And look at it this way, now you're free to go hit on her. Cos otherwise you would've had zero chance my friend." Jakob cuts in.

David nods, grinning. "Yeah man. Plus Shaun, you've been pining after her for days now, here's your chance."

Shaun lights up. "Thats true!" He folds the note back up and flips it over so it lands right in front of me. "You keep her number TJ, I'm gonna get it on my own."

Rumen lets out a laugh. "Yeah good luck with that." He turns towards me. "Well, if you change your mind about her...let us know. Because yeah, if you throw your hat into the ring; we're done for."

I know that they mean all of this in jest, and even that comment alone was meant to be a compliment...but it still stings.

It's one of the rare few things I hate about this job of mine.  
I don't ask for all this attention, and I know that my friends know that. They know me. Hell, they even take advantage of it all FOR me sometimes.  
They help me laugh through it; using it for some form of random promo they need or whatever.  
and I dont mind. They're never malicious or jealous. They've always treated me the same they have throughout our lives.

It's just sometimes...sometimes these comments don't sit well under my skin.

I force a smile. "True, you wouldn't. But dont worry. I'm not going to pursue her."

Rumen and Shaun high five and Alfred jumps in to resume everyones original football discussion. The 3 of them starting to gesticulate loudly.

Jakob leans into me. "Do what you want T." He gestures to the paper in front of me. "Keep it, or throw it away." He shrugs and moves to take a drink of his soda.

I nod. Picking up the paper and staring at it in my hands. That dull pain starting to grow inside me.

"Might be good to keep." David says quietly.

I turn to him, eyebrow raised in question.

He gives me a small smile. "If you want, of course, but maybe it'll be nice to have when you..." He waves his arm around. "Wanna get back into dating...after all this."

The dull pain grows; gets sharper.

After all this.  
So he doesn't expect Henrik to stick around.

I feel the air closing in, my fears on the verge of bubbling over.  
I look at Jakob, who was clearly having a yelling fest with David via their eyes. He cuts down to me, his blue eyes comforting me somewhat, and smiles.

"Hey." He nudges me. "You never know what can happen, right?"

I manage a grin back at him and then he and David integrade themselves into the growing argument around the table.

I never know. I don't fucking know anything. What the hell am I even doing? Falling for my coworker? Someone I won't see after filming ends?

The familiar doubts spread through my body like a virus.

I need air; I can't breathe.

Just as I"m about to stand up, my phone pings.  
I pull it out.

_Henrik: So do you think it'd be okay if we text sometimes though?_

_Henrik: Or maybe just like once a day..?_

_Henrik: Fuck_

_Henrik: Okay, cards on the damn table; this is going to be hard for me. But I respect why we're doing this, and I stand by that. I still think this is a good idea for what you're trying to do.  
It just....sucks. _

I read through his messages twice. His words soaking up the poisonous thoughts threading my mind.  
Leaving nothing but a soft hum.

And letting that hope back in. 

I feel the strain in my cheeks as my grin overtakes them.  
I slide my phone back into my pocket, I'll answer him later.

And I join in the banter with my friends, my smile never faltering.

\---

Today felt different....raw.

The performance Henrik gave in our locker room scene...it was absolutely beautiful.  
Honestly, his emotions filtered across his face like a damn movie screen and it was all I could do to keep up. His blue eyes were, at one moment, searing with happiness, relief, hope; the next, guarded, defensive, careful  
The kisses we had, felt the most emotional ones we've had yet.They were only two, and the two were so different.  
The passion of them was the same, yet while the first one was lined with joy, the second one I felt had another underlying emotion.  
Almost like a sadness...Desperation maybe? Reassurance? I couldn't place it.

I personally felt good about today. Gave it my all.  
Isak's elation at seeing Even again. Even telling him he's done with Sonja.  
I know that this is the peak before the plummet.  
But I let himself enjoy it. Enjoy having Even's mouth on his, their hands intertwined between them. How Isak allowed Even to touch him even though they were at school. How Isak is letting himself believe he can have this, that he can find happiness.

Henrik left set quickly after the last cut. He claimed he wasn't feeling that great.

He did look pale. But also I knew that he didn't want to linger. Trying to be respectful of our arrangement.

Fuck...he look good today.

I roll onto my back on my bed, closing my eyes.  
When he changed out of his 'Even' clothes and into his own; his hair was all muddled up from the beanie and the several layers of clothes he had on.

The black, skin-tight graphic tshirt with those tan skinnies. His blue sapphires sparkling as his smile briefly appeared towards me before his hasty exit.

Damnit, I miss him.  
Already. I'm pathetic.

I miss the sound of his laugh. The way his canines show and his eyes squint up when he smiles to wide.  
His eyebrow raises and quick humour.  
His lean legs with lis long torso.  
His toned arms.  
His hands.  
Fuck  
His hands. 

His hands on my body. Caressing my skin; leaving heat in their wake.

I can't help it.  
With my eyes still shut, I glide my hand down my bare chest, imaginging it being Henrik's own; before lightly palming my half-hard cock through my sweats. I suck in a breath as I rub back and forth along the fabric.

Henrik's mouth on the pulse of my neck. Tongue licking across a fresh bruise he had left. One of his hands forcing my head to the side. The other holding my wrist, pinned to the mattress.

Shuffling, I pull my sweats and underwear down to my thighs.  
My now fully hard cock springing free, begging to be touched.  
I spread the precum around with my thumb before sliding my hand up and down to coat my length.

Eyes still squeezed shut, I start my pace.  
Slow and gently pulling on the downstroke skin.

Henrik's mouth moving down my chest, teeth grazing my soft skin until he finds my nipples, enclosing his mouth around it and pulling until the pain is exquisite.

I bring my free hand up and roll my sensitive nipple between my fingers and allow a moan to escape me. My hand moving faster along my cock.

Him leaving hidden bruises along my inner thighs, rubbing his thumbs along the soft skin of the joint where my legs meet my hips.  
My clock sliding into his warm, moist mouth. His tongue twirling around the tip and flicking into my slit.

My hips buck up on their own as I beat myself at almost an erratic pace.  
I drop my free hand from my nipple to move it to grasp my pillow near my face. I turn my head into it slightly to muffle the continuous soft groans pouring out of my mouth.

Henrik's tongue lapping at my balls, playing with one at a time in his mouth before moving to trail his wet lips against my rim. Him pressing the flat of his tongue over my hole, again and again until I almost start to beg

My hand is almost a blur and I feel the burn inside of me stir. Fuck I'm so close.

"Henrik." I gasp out.

Henrik darting his tongue out to a point, trying to open me up. Over and over and over until he can finally press in further and lick inside of me.

My hips start to move down at the memory. God. Fuck. I wish he was here.  
I tighten my grip on myself and jerk off faster than ever. A loud moan crashes out before I slap my hand over my mouth.  
I twist my wrist hard on the upstroke and then i'm coming. Hard.  
My back arches as I shout against my hand. I feel the wet, warmth shoot across my chest and even splatter up to my neck.  
I slow my hand down as I milk the last of the release, then I let go, my flaccid dick setting against my stomach.

I try to steady my breathing.  
For fucks sake.

He wasn't even here yet I still came almost as hard as if he was.

I let out a breathy laugh as I lean over my bed to grab the towel I had left there from my shower earlier. Cleaning myself, I pull up my sweats and lay back down on my bed.

Grinning, I allow my thoughts to trail to something I've been yearning for.

Henrik and I have known each other for two months now.  
We've touched.  
We've tasted.  
We've taken the other apart by our fingers.  
And yet..

We haven't had sex.

And Christ, I want to.

I want him to fuck me so hard I can't walk. Want him to hold me down and have me screaming into his neck. I want to leave scratches all over his back. I want bruises on my hips. I want to feel the twitch of his release inside of me.

I roll over to my side and let out a sigh.

I'm torn on how to approach it with him.  
I don't know if he even would want to? We've never talked about it. Never brought it up.

So maybe he doesn't want to.

The dull pain flutters.

Maybe he just doesnt want to because he doesn't want to lead me on? Or he doesn't want to because he know's it'll be harder when this is....over?

Groaning, I press my palms into my eyes.

Enough.  
This is enough, I'm fucking sick of it.

I'm sick of having these thoughts. Of constantly worrying.  
From the beginning, we've said we were going to be honest and open with each other.  
And fuck. We've both failed that.

I"m tired. I'm just so damn tired of fighting this feeling, fighting the doubts, fighting the hope.

I'm going to talk to him. I have to. About all of this. Lay all of this out between us. No more secret pining. No more stupid worrying thoughts.  
All of it. Everything I'm feeling. I'm going to tell him.

After we film episode 6. I'm going to tell him.

\---

Whispers.

Whispers filtering in is what breaks through first.

"Is he okay?"

"Do you think I pushed him too far?"

"Marlon went to get David."

"Should we get Henrik?"

"No."

Second comes the tones.  
Concern. Fright. Pity. More concern.

Then I feel.  
The wind hitting my cheeks. The grass under my hands. The wetness seeping into my jeans.

"Tarjei?" Julie's voice. Closer than I thought she was.

"Tarjei? Hey." I hear her bend down next to me. "Hey. It's okay. Yeah? It's okay. You're okay." She repeats.

I focus on her words.  
I'm okay.  
I'm okay. 

"Tj?"

Another voice joins. David. I sense him kneel next to me; feel his hand touch my back.

"Hey man. Shake it off. Get out of your head."

I close my eyes and take in a deep breath.  
I hold it for a moment, focusing on David's hand rubbing circles on my back.

"Breathe." David murmers.

I let out my breath.  
But the numbness remains.

"Isak.." I choke out. I feel the tears still hitting my cheeks, I didnt know I was still crying. 

"Shh. Tarjei. Hey." David pulls me to him, and I take in his childhood inducing scent. "You're not Isak. Okay? You're not." 

But I am.  
I feel every emotion he feels. More so. Because I'm the one that calls them to surface.  
I'm the one that brings it out. I do what it takes to get there. No matter how raw and broken it causes me.

I bury myself in Davids chest. I hear the rumble of his voice. The repetition of his words breaking through.

"You're okay."

"Breathe."

"He's fine."

He. Who? Isak? or Henrik?  
Or both. 

Henrik.

I long for it to be him who's holding me. I wish it could be. His strong arms and deep voice, calming me down from this.  
But I wouldn't allow it.

No. I did this. I did this to myself. I wanted this. And I'm strong enough to see it through.

Isak.

His pain. His pain will be hard. These upcoming days for him will be hard.  
But hold on man, it get's better for you.  
I'm with you every step of the way.

I take one more deep breath and push myself from David's arms.  
I glance around to take in my surroundings.  
Fuck  
I'm literally still on the damn grass, in the same spot from where Julie called cut.

Shit. Julie. She's probably freaking out.

My head snaps to look for her, only to find her right next to me, a surprisingly calm look on her face.

I clear my throat. "I'm sorry." I muster out.

Julie gives me a crooked smile. "You know...when you told me that you get strongly affected by heart-wrenching emotions...I didn't think it would be like this." She gestures to me. "And a part of me is terrified, another part incredibly worried..but." She softens. "I just can't believe I lucked out with getting an actor that cares this much for his character." Reaching out, she places a hand on my shoulder. "Don't apologise. You are just responding to coming back from the place I took you." She squeezes my shoulder before removing her hand. "And I'M sorry for that...except...I'm not."

I sniff and half smile up at her. "Don't apologise for being the worlds best director."

Julie tilts her head at me. "Who the fuck are you Valtersen-Moe?"

A laugh bursts out of me as Julie winks and stands up to walk back over to the rest of the crew.

David stands and helps me to my feet as well.  
We stand there for a moment

"This one was intense." I say to him.

David nods slowly. "Seemed like it. I'm glad I was still around. I mean, I know you wouldve been fine-"

"But it's better when someone I'm familiar with is there to ground me back." I finish with a grin towards him.

He grins back before lightly punching me in the arm. "Always dude." His grin widens. "Just stop being so goddamn emotional all the time eh?"

I roll my eyes. "Can't help it man. Came with me being an actor."

"And thats why you're the best at what you do." Came Davids response.

I blink up at him, my mouth slighly open. Loss for words.

David clears his throat. "You uh..may want to contact Henrik." 

Shit.

"Fuck! David! Did you tell him?" I rip the snapback off my head. 

"I didnt! I swear! Marlon was looking for me and Henrik asked why and one of the crew told him."

I run a hand through my hair. "Shit...I thought he'd gone home by then. I mean.." I let out a breath. "I knew I was going have this emotion breakdown, I was hoping he wasn't going to be around to hear about it." 

David lets out a huff. "Yeah well...I guess he was very concerned."

His words send a spark in my stomach.  
But I have to do this. 

"Will you.....will you tell him I'm fine?" I manage to get out.

David stares at me for a moment. "Seriously? You're not going to break you're litle 'no contact' thing to shoot him a quick text?"

"No." I swallow. "No. I had already told him that after we film the last clip of episode 5, we're having no contact outside of work until the end of episode 6." 

"The fuck dude...why?"

"Because Isak going through this. He gets nothing besides a couple of hope raising drawings and an unfortunate encounter at the cafeteria..I'm.." I smooth my hand over the brim of the red snapback. "He was left in the dark. I need to be at that level with him."

David shakes his head, an incredulous smile forming on his lips. "How..how are you like this? God Tj. You're just so..." He suddenly spins around and starts walking away towards the direction of the bus stop. 

"So what?" I call after him as I follow, nodding reassuringly at the crew as I pass them by. 

"So fucking talented. Love you bro. Now hurry up. The last bus leaves in 20." 

Laughing, I place the snapback back on my head and run after him.

The fall was hard. But now Isak can start climbing back up. Grasping onto stone by stone until he has the strength to be able to pull himself out.  
And I know he can.


	12. The Toast Without Cardamon: Henrik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooo.  
> This chapter kicked my butt to rewrite. It was almost kinda discouraging..cos I lost all my notes and stuff.  
> I know this took awhile for me to post but please bare with me. I dont want to half arse a chapter. I dont want to force it.  
> I know where I want to take this story so hopefully it'll come together like how I had originally planned.
> 
> little disclaimer: this gets a TAD angsty. Just a little. promise. and it gets resolved super quick.
> 
> also PLEASE read my end notes. I have a question for you lot. x
> 
> Enjoy. :)
> 
> Thank you all for being so patient and kind. x  
> -V

I release the smoke from my mouth, staring down at my phone clutched in my hand. The world muted as I stand here, alone in my flat.

_David: H, he's fine. It's not as bad as it probably sounded. Chill okay?_

Chill.

Marlon had come rushing up, pale and searching for David. Telling him to get to Tarjei as soon as possible. Sounding like T was fucking injured or something.  
but sure, i'll 'chill'.

I pull in a drag of smoke into my mouth, holding it. 

Its not like I freaked out. I just wanted to know if he was alright. I don't even know what happened. I don't know if I truly want to know.  
Sounds like maybe he just got worked up. I knew that was going to be rough scene to film for him. 

Rough scene. Shit.  
We're filming the hotel scene in two weeks. And I'm positive Julie hasn't told him about Even or the manic episode or anything.

I let out the puff with a sigh.  
I get why. I do. I get why she's holding it from him. Julie always wants us to FEEL. She gets us to where she wants us to go.  
In that locker room scene, Julie pulled me aside and brought me to the level she wanted. And it worked.  
But Tarjei is her main. And as much as she's just trying to get him to show all the turmoil across, that 'left in the dark' feeling Isak gets; I still think its fucking stupid. 

Fuck it.

I stuff out my cigarette in my ashtray angrily and slide open my phone, going to her contact info immediately. I don't even care if its close to 2.20am. 

It rings twice.

"Before you say one word to me, Holm. I'm telling him this week." Julie's voice is sharp.

That stops me. My frustrations rush out of my head. "Are you?"

She sighs. "Yes.. He needs time to process it." She pauses. "I know it was wrong to keep him in the dark but.." She trails off. 

I run a hand through my hair, deciding to ignore the chance of me calling her out in favour of a question i'm scared to ask but longing to know. "What the fuck happened tonight?"

A pause. "Something that you don't need to concern yourself about." Came the answer.

"No one's telling me shit, Julie." I snarl back. 

Another sigh. "Fine. What happened tonight is I took Tarjei to a place emotionally and mentally where I needed Isak to be. I asked. He delivered. Exceedingly so." She lets out a huff. "Tarjei is very in tune with Isak. Feels all his emotions. All what happened is that it took someone familiar to him to help bring him back..thats it."

I pause. Thoughts flooding my mind. Possibilities of where exactly Tarjei went, how he got that far down.  
I swallow. "But, it sounded like-"

"For fucks sake Henrik! Talk to Tarjei about it. It's his business." She snaps.

I stay silent. Knowing that i'm pushing it with her.  
I'm at the edge and so is she.  
I'm just terrified that one of the options floating in my mind is right.

"Just..." She lets out a long sigh. "Listen, you're making this out to be more than it is. Talk to Tarjei, if you want. But if you didn't know about this, then I think thats probably because he didn't want you to. I don't think he likes talking about it. I feel like he maybe gets embarassed or finds himself weak or something." She chuckles. "Which is ridiculous because the damn performance he gave tonight was absolute gold."

Suddenly Tarjei's word flow through my mind. "Isak's moods affect my own sometimes."

Oh.  
That must've been T's way of telling me. Of...warning me? Letting me know how he can get?  
Maybe.  
Maybe I should talk to him.  
Maybe I should let it be.  
Let him elaborate about it, should he choose to.  


_Stop._

I close my eyes and lean back against my wall, feeling the cold through my tshirt.  
No. I need to let it be. It doesn't concern me...right?  
I mean, I'm just his coworker...right?

The confusion inside of me stifles. I feel my mind slow as that last thought flashes in my mind.

I clear my throat. Feeling the scratch. "So..he's okay?"

Julie lets out a groan. "He's FINE. I promise. He left set with David, laughing"

"Thats good." I mumble.

"You're making yourself worry over nothing." She pauses. "I'll let you know when I talk to him. Do you want to be there?" 

I hesitate. I know that Tarjei needs to be well informed in all of this. And i'm glad Julie's going to tell him.  
I just don't want him to think I willingly withheld this from him.  
But i want to be there.  
I need to be. 

"Yes."

\---

"Hi."

My head snaps up, instantly connecting with meadow-green eyes that i've longed for.  
He's standing in front of me, snapback on. Isak on.  
A tentative smile on his lips.

I open my mouth to speak but my tongue feels like its swelling. I shake my head slightly and return him an easy smile. "Hey boyfriend."

Tarjei's face flumes and he looks away briefly. "I've missed that." He mutters.

 _Oh baby. So have I._  
It takes all my self control to not reach out and touch him.  
But I sense he's breaking his little rule for a reason. I'll let him lead.

"Um. Julie....Julie wants to get together after today and talk to us both. About the rest of the season." His eyes tracing my face.  
I see his confusion. His sense of trying to figure it out. Also his confusion as to why I need to be there.

Better to be honest. "Yeah she, uh, mentioned to that to me the other day." Not a lie. 

One of Tarjei's eyebrows shoots up. "Oh? Well. Why the fuck was she so adament I ask you-"

"I'm glad you did." I cut him off. My eyes finally locking with his.  
I can't hold it back anymore. "Can I..." I open my arms out, my voice losing itself with my nerves.

He hesitates for half of a second, as if debating internally before almost launching himself into my arms.

It's like I can finally breathe. I feel his arms around my waist, his face pressed into my chest. His hot breath fanning over my skin. I clasp him to me. Savouring every moment i'm getting. His body fitting perfectly against mine. Like coming home.

I can feel his smile before a laugh escapes him. "We really are pathetic. You know that right?" His voice almost muffled as he noses up into my collarbones

My breath hitches as I feel him place the softest kiss against my protruding bone. "Y-yeah." I swallow. "Its been...what?....close to almost 2 weeks?"  
Actually 10 days exactly but who's counting.

"Mm." Tarjei hums. "Something like that." I feel him release a big sigh and I hold him tighter, knowing he'll let go in mere moments.

I've missed him. I've missed him so much. And this was the second time i've got to see him this week. The first being watching him walk across the courtyard. But this time, I get to actually have lines with him. Such hurt emotions we'll get to play off each other. Isak and Even. Broken. Meeting by chance in the cafeteria. Even, not wanting to hurt Isak or trouble him with his MI. Isak, not knowing why Even all of sudden stopped everything and went back to Sønja.

Seeing Tarjei here, talking with him....  
Fuck. I have to give the kid props, because I now know exactly what emotions to channel. How to convey Even's utter inner turmoil and longing.  
Tarjei's stupid rule has been worth it.

He pulls away, all to soon. And I can't help but reach across and trace my thumb lightly over his prominent cheekbone. "I've missed you." I whisper, hoping my words will get lost in the chaos of the crew around us.

No such luck, as Tarjei smiles at me, a closed-lipped one, dimples showing, face full of fondness. "I've missed you too." He leans into my palm, his eyes fluttering before connecting back to mine.

Green and Blue. As it always should be. 

\---

This street is too loud. Or not loud enough.

I can feel my phone buzzing in my pocket. Days of unanswered texts just sitting there getting piled on.  
It's not that I'm purposely ignoring my friends and family lately...its just not on the forefront of my mind.

And the object that DOES most occupy my mind, is walking next to me. Uncharacteristically quiet.  
The full completed scripts for episodes 7 and 8 clutched in his hand. Already crinkling.

I didn't know how to start. How to begin to pry into his mind.  
I knew this was alot to process.  
But he'd taken it so well. Sitting there in one of the big NRK conference rooms, facing Julie, with the scrips in front of her.  
He was shocked a bit, granted; as he read them. But as soon as he was done, I watched as he set his brow and went back and forth with her. Asking every question he could think of. Trying to get to where he could understand Isak's reasons.

It was only after Julie suggested he and I chat more about it to have him understand Even's own reasons; that it seemed like Tarjei even remembered I was in the room.  
I couldn't look away from him the entire time; half terrified he'd be upset with me, half waiting for him to rage to Julie. Trying to decipher his thoughts.  
Yet all he did was nod at me before standing up.

And I followed him. 

We've been walking in silence for 10 minutes. I'm not even sure he has a destination set, so I follow. Keeping my pace with his. I can feel several emotions roll off of him. Never settling.

I have to break this unease. "So..uh. What do you think about-"

"Shut up, Henrik." Tarjei cuts me off, not even looking at me. Still walking swiftly. 

"Excuse me?" My mouth drops open a bit, my eyebrow cocking.

This time he does glance over to me, and I take note of his set mouth, his flashing eyes.  
Fuck. He's angry.

"Where's your scripts Henrik, hmm? Didn't need a SECOND copy of them?" He rolls his eyes and quickens his pace. "Just shut the fuck up for one minute."

Wow. Okay. This is the way you want to handle this, is it?  
I take a steady breath, trying to get my growing annoyance to stop before it boils over.

"That's not fair. I only got eps 7 and 8 a couple of days ago-"

Tarjei stops and spins to face me. His face turning red. "ONLY?! Only got what? The fucking written word for word scripts? You knew what was happening this entire time!"  
His chest was close to heaving. Anger and hurt clear on his face. "For weeks, Henrik. You've known all of this for WEEKS. And you sat there and never said a word."

The familiar guilt creeps into my skin, putting a lining over my anger. "I wanted to Tarjei. I wanted to every single day. I just couldn't. I-"

"Please stop. Just.." Tarjei rubs a hand over his face and turns back down the street. "I don't want to do this here." He stands there, almost vibrating with his emotions coursing through him.

I set my mouth and nod. Glancing around, I take note that people have probably been giving us weird looks; probably recognising us. Then I double-take at the building across the street, almost shocked. Of all the damn streets....  
"Cmon." I growl at him and start crossing the road. 

Tarjei had led us to the street I lived on. As I opened the street door, I couldn't help but let a little smile escape me.  
I don't know whether he brought us here on accident or purpose...it still was satisfying that at least subconsciously, I'm somehow in his mind.

We get to my door, and I feel Tarjei's breath as I place my key in to open it. I shut my eyes for one moment.  
This was it. This was the buildup we knew was coming. Everything I"ve ever wanted to say to him is going to come pouring out.  
And I'm ready. i'm ready to get it all out there. Lay it raw.

 _As soon as he stops being a little bitch though._  
My anger flares back up and I shove my door open.

I quickly take off my shoes and jacket, leaving them scattered on the floor, and make my way to my bedroom.  
I need a fucking smoke.

I light up, close my eyes and take in the first inhale. When I release and open them, I see Tarjei leaning against my wall. I didn't even hear him come in.

We stare at each other for a moment. The only sound being my exhales of smoke.  
It wasn't uncomfortable. But it wasn't filled with calmness.

I can feel how upset he is. Feel the slight betrayal. The hurt. I can feel him put on his armour. His need to have control. He's on the verge. Verge of what, I wasn't sure.  
Wasn't sure I wanted to know. Wasn't sure if I couldn't bear not knowing. Whether things will change. Whether I'm ready to hear it. 

Better dive in. Get this over with. But where to start? I can't even fucking organise my thoughts right now.  
I pick one and it rolls out of my mouth.

"What happened to you Saturday night?"

Tarjei sets his jaw, hiding his look of surprise. "Nothing."

I raise my eyebrows at him, and let out a drag. "Sure." The cigarette hiding my trembling fingers.

Tarjei holds my gaze, trying to read me as much as I'm trying to read him. Both of us on the same page, but different paragraphs.  
He lets out a frustrated huff. "Fuck. Fine. Honestly? Nothing. I don't know why people keep making big deals out of it. I got wrapped up in Isak. And it took David to ground me back. Thats. It."

Not good enough. "Why did you get so wrapped up in Isak?" I'm clearly asking for him to unleash on me. But I can't help it..the feeling of something boiling within him is threatening to spill over. It needs to spill over. I know its there.

He throws his hands in the air and pushes off my wall. "I don't fucking know? I just do sometimes. I channel his emotions in me. I don't-"

"No" I lean over to stub out my cigarette in the ashtray on my desk, steadying myself. "Why that scene in particular? Why was it hard for you to pull out with THAT particular scene?" I can taste it. I can taste his words. The words slowly forming between us in his silence.... But I've already known. Known why for a couple of days now. Yet I was still unprepared.  
My mouth slowly dropping open as the realisation hits me hard, branding me with the truth.  
Then I see it; I see it flash in his brillantly green eyes for a instant. A second. But I saw it.

And he knows I did.

Oh my god.  
Suddenly the room gets heavier, my breath becomes shorter. I place my hand over my chest and rub it a bit. "Tarjei-"

"Fuck. You." Tarjei spits out. His eyes looking down at the floor. "You don't...you don't get to stand there and..and..fuck." He's stuttering out. I know he's feeling vulnerable. He can't stop moving. His hands pulling through his hair, body rocking back and forth on his feet. Eyes looking everywhere. "You don't have the right to ask me-" 

"Tarjei! Look at me, damnit!" I shout.

His eyes snap to mine. And we're back. Always. Back to sapphires and emeralds. Back to the blending of the blue-green of the ocean. Back to where we began.

How did I miss this? Was this here the whole time? Staring me in the face? Was I so wrapped up in our 'rules' and us just 'living the moment together' that I completely overlooked this?  
Or was it my own dilemma? My own lies I said to myself. Making him and I have the 'whatever happens happens' bullshit that I thought would be best for us. Or was it me? Did I say all that for my own selfish personal sake? Did I force myself to believe that THAT was going to be what's best for us?  
It didn't hold the whole time though. There were times I broke, where I allowed myself to acknowledge it. Where I woke up before him in the mornings and could't stop marveling at the boy next to me. Where I longed to show him off as we walked down the street. Where I watched him laugh from across the room and ached to be the one to kiss his lips as they formed into that smile.

It was there since the first day we kissed. The day we talked for hours. Where we gladly stripped our souls and reformed them...to be joined.

I'm in love with him.

And he's in love with me.

I take in a deep breath as I start to move closer to him. Open my mouth, but shut it. My eyes holding his, I see his his anger being replaced with an almost fear. His exterior cracking. Stopping close enough that our chest are almost touching, I wet my lips and open my mouth again.

"Baby..." My voice comes out at a whisper. "I know."  
I raise my hands and gently place them on either side of Tarjei's jaw, forcing him to keep his eyes on me. I caress his cheek with my thumb, losing myself in his gaze. I know he would never say it first. Probably in denial like I was.  
But we're moving on from that. No more hiding from each other.

Tarjei swallows. His eyes moving back and forth wildly. "You..do?" His voice barely audible.

I nod and lean in, connecting our foreheads. "I always have."

He closes his eyes at my words. "Henrik..."

I replace my forehead against his with my lips, kissing him softly. "Hey boyfriend?" I ask, my voice a purr.  
Tarjei smiles, his dimples on display, and opens his eyes. I tighten my grip on his neck and jaw and stare into to where my soul belongs.

"I love you." 

It was like whatever walls between us shattered and Tarjei surges forward, crashing his lips to mine. I barely have time to respond when he pulls away. "Oh my god. I love you. I fucking love you so much Henrik." Tarjei whispers huskily.

My body feels like its full of electrics as I bring our lips back together, both of our smiles making our mouths wide.  
We continue to move in our natural sync, lips knowing exactly how to entice the other.

_He loves me_

I move my hands to his waist and pull him closer to me. His arms finding their way around my shoulders and one of his hands tangling into my hair.  
Turning him slightly, I walk us to my bed. When the back of his knees hit the edge, I let go and push him down. He bounces with a giggle and my heart grows 200x more. 

This is my boy.

I quickly crawl up his body as he scoots himself more to the middle of my bed.  
He pulls me down and reconnects our mouths, this time forcing mine open with his tongue licking across my bottom lip. Our tongues slide against each other, almost gently before I pull slightly on his hair and he groans, his mouth getting even wider for me to stroke into.

Tarjei's hands suddenly come between us and pushes on my chest lightly. I release his mouth and move to attack his neck as he gasps out a laugh. "Don't think I'm not still pissed at you for holding out on information about this season." He traces his hands down my back, pushing his fingers underneath at the hem of my tshirt, scratching my skin.

I bite down and Tarjei presses against me with a moan. I suck on that sensitive spot, knowing i'm going to leave a mark.  
I let go and blow on it. "I'm sorry baby." I kiss the spot and start making my way up his neck and over his jaw. "I wanted to tell you so many times." I mutter. I graze my teeth over his jawline, my hands now holding his hips.

"I know." He whines out as I flick my tongue into his ear, nibbling on the lobe. "I know. I get that you couldn't tell me. I even get why Julie withheld it from me." He pants. 

That stops my teasing and I raise up to look at his face. "You do?"

"I do. I hate it but she's kinda a genius." He shrugs, his eyes fond. He glances away for a moment before looking back up at me. "And..I'm sorry for getting upset with you. I knew it wasn't your fault. I just...needed someone to get mad at." He winks. "And you were there so."

I allow my grin to spread across my face. "You little shit."

"Get the fuck off of-" Tarjei starts to say but I cut him off with my mouth back on his and a roll of my hips.

Tarjei groans and raises his hips to meet mine. My mouth moving down over his neck as my hands push up his shirt. "Off."

He quickly sits up and discards his shirt as I follow suit, both of us flinging them somewhere in my room.  
I immediately crash back over Tarjei. Our bare chests sliding against each other, my hands tracing his muscles in his abs as they contract under my touch. My mouth grazes over his collarbones, making him release a shuddering sigh. 

It's like all of my senses were suddenly heightened. We've been here before. Been in this position. But this feels so different. More raw. More real. I wanted to take my time, worship his body, show him how I felt without using words.

Tarjei grinds his hips up to get friction with mine, causing our cocks to brush together, making us both grunt out. I route my mouth down his chest and nose at the light hair trailing into his waistline.  
Raising my head, our eyes connect and he smiles and gives a nod. I grin at him and sit up to undo his trousers and slide them off with his underwear. I pop my own jeans open and push them down my legs, kicking them off the side of my bed.

I move back over him and Tarjei brings his hands up to pull me to his mouth. This time I play dirty, forcing his mouth open and fucking inside with movements that I long to mirror. He lets out a deep growl and his nails squeeze on my shoulders.  
I bring a hand up and tangle my fingers in his hair, gripping tightly and forcing his head back, his pale neck exposed.

"Fuck." I spit as I dive in, teeth first. Tarjei hisses and drags his nails down my upper back. I shiver with pleasure as I suck and nip and lick over the expanse of his pulsing skin. Finishing, I break away, and raise up on my elbows; our noses inches apart. Staring directly into his forest green eyes, I slowly drag my clothed cock against his exposed one. 

His eyes flutter and his mouth drops open in a gasp as I continue my thrusting. His hands moving all over my skin, trying to find a steady place to hold. His breaths coming out in short bursts as we rut against each other. "Henrik.." He groans out. "Fuck. Please.. Just-"

I pause my movements. "What do you want baby?" I lean down and place a kiss against his swollen lips. "Just tell me." I breathe over them.  
I knew what I wanted, but I would never push him. We've never gone that far. Never let ourselves get that far.

Tarjei hesitates and I take advantage. I go down my familiar scent of kisses down his chest. My hands following, sliding over every hard yet soft piece of skin along the way, pausing at his hips. I rub my thumbs against the bone joint as I wet my lips. Staring at his throbbing, red cock. Finally.  
I place a kiss along the base and move my way up. Tarjei swivels his hips so I grasp on tighter, forcing them down. "Stay still." I growl.

Sticking my tongue out, I lick into the leaking slit. Tarjei jerks under me, his hands clutching the duvet.  
I smile, I can't tease him for long.  
I wet my lips one more time before taking him fully in my mouth, hollowing out my cheeks.

"Fuck!" Tarjei almost yells. I readjust my grip on his hips, pushing down hard enough that I know I'll leave bruises, bruises I know he'll like.

I slide my mouth up, tongue swirling around the tip as I glide back down, finding my rhythm. I move my head up and down, my mouth a perfect tight 'O'. On the next slide, I take him as far as I can, his cock hitting the back of my throat. And I hum around it.  
Tarjei is a writhing mess underneath me, moans and curses flowing out of his mouth, his knuckles almost white.

I make my way back up his length, sucking hard as I pop off.  
I'm about to take him back in when he stops me.

"Wait. Want you to fuck me." He breathes out in a rush.

What.  
My brain falters.

I sit up and climb back over him. His face is flushed, sweat grazing his brow. I push back the hair from his forehead, staring at him. "Are you sure?" 

Tarjei smiles reassuringly at me. "Yes. Please, Henrik." He brings up his hand and traces my lips with his thumb. "I want to come with you inside of me."

I'm suddenly aware of how hard my straining dick is against my underwear. Fuck. I feel it twitch when hearing his words.

He must've found my shock funny because he bursts out laughing. "It's not like we're virgins, H. You alright?" He licks his lips, mouth shiny and wide.

That breaks through and I cock an eyebrow at him. "Fuck off. I know that. Its just our first time..you know..together. I just wanna make sure-"

"Henrik." Tarjei rolls his eyes in pure adoration. "Fuck me. God, that's all I've been wanting for weeks." He reaches again and cards his fingers through my hair. "I want to have this with YOU." He flushes prettily, but his eyes don't leave mine.

My mouth is dry, refusing to form any words. So I lean down and latch our mouths. Keeping it soft, light.  
"Okay." I whisper. "Okay yeah."

I climb off of him and move towards my nightstand, opening the drawer and taking out lube and a condom. Then I quickly shed my underwear before returning to the bed.  
I place the items next to me and move to hover over Tarjei. My eyes drinking in his naked body. He is just so fucking beautiful. From his unruly curls, his gapped teeth, his protruding collarbones and toned abs. Fuck. Everything about him draws me in.

Tarjei raises his eyebrows at me, watching my eyes roam over him. I catch it and shoot him a wink. "You're fucking hot, you know that?" I laugh as a blush spreads all over his face and partly onto his chest as I stretch over and grab the lube, pouring some onto my fingers.

"Come. Here." Tarjei growls at me, gripping the back of my neck and attaching our mouths. This time I let him control. Let him tear my mouth open and bend my tongue into submission.

I trail my lubed up hand over his thighs, causing his breath to hitch. Keeping our mouths connected, I move more to the side of him, pushing his hips as wide as they can. Tarjei whines as my fingers move closer. Grazing over his balls before moving up to circle over his entrance.  
I quicken my pace, my circles moving faster, barely touching that puckered hole before I move them away.

"Such a tease." Tarjei groans. One of his hands holding onto my bicep, the other tangled back in the duvet.

I smile into our kiss before finally pushing one finger inside of him.  
HIs mouth drops open as he gasps. I lean back slightly to watch him, keeping my finger slow in its movement. Internally rejoicing at my genetically big hands.  
He bites his bottom lip as I hit my knuckle. I check his face over one more time for discomfort before pumping it in and out.

Tarjei keens and leans his head back into the pillows. "Ah. More...please.."

On my next stroke in, I slide my middle finger in with the first. I can feel the stretch of his rim as I push in. Turning my fingers around to open him up as much as I can.  
He lets out whimper as I twist my fingers in deeper, knowing I was close to his prostate. I adjust my body so that my hand has a better angle of him. And on the next slide in, I push as deep as I can, the tips of my fingers brushing against his spot. 

"Oh fuck!" Tarjei chokes out. "Fuckfuckfuck right there." His hips start thrusting down against my hand.

I watch him, entranced by him fucking himself on my fingers. My body is on fire. Unable to ignore the wetness leaking from my swollen, throbbing dick. Shit. I need to get inside of him if I want to last. I grip the base of my cock tightly, letting the pressure simmer. And I slowly pull out my fingers. 

Tarjei huffs a frustrated breath as I move in more between his legs. "You alright?" I smirk, reaching for the condom.

He lets out a breathy laugh. "Yeah, more than alright." He lifts a leg and taps my side with his foot. "Hurry and get inside me."

I rip the condom open. "Impatient much?" I wink as I slowly roll it on my straining length.

"I've just been waiting for this since we met so..." Tarjei gleams.

Grabbing more lube, I coat my cock with it. "Oh really?" I move his hips so that they're wide as they can go and lean over him, our dicks grazing each other.

Tarjei bites his lip. "Y-yeah. Shit. You're so hot. "

I connect our mouths, moving them languidly against each other before biting his top lip and pulling away. I roll my hips and the tip of my cock brushes against his hole. Tarjei hisses out and squirms; eyes shutting briefly.

"Hey.." I murmur, placing a hand against his cheek. "Hey boyfriend." 

Tarjei rolls his eyes, a smile spreading over his face. He leans up, one hand behind supporting him, as he places his mouth against mine before moving softly down my neck. "Henrik..." he breathes over my skin. "I want you."

A growl erupts from my throat as I force his head up to kiss him. I lay him back under me and release his mouth. Sitting up, I shuffle around and grasp onto his thighs, pulling them closer to me. I stick two fingers back inside him to check how open he is and he sighs, "I'm ready, babe." He strains.

I nod. Again, not trusting myself to speak. I feel all my emotions rise as I pull out my fingers and line myself up.  
One hand on his hip, one hand on my cock, I lean down to kiss the inside of his knee and slowly push in

Oh my god. He was so damn tight. And warm. And wet. It was taking all of my control to not shove all the way in. I get halfway in when I feel Tarjei's hand on my wrist, squeezing pressure on it.  
I stop pushing immediately and look at him. His head was thrown back, neck pulsing, chest heaving. Little moans coming out of his mouth with every other breath.

"Fuck. You're so big." He says. "I need a second." He closes his eyes and lets out two deep breaths. My thumb rubbing reassuringly on his hip.  
"Okay." He mutters. "You can keep going." He squeezes my wrist again and lets go. 

I almost shout with relief. His tightness was making my dick inch closer and closer to ecstacy. I grip him a little harder and push in, slowly, filling him up. His moans turn deeper, hands holding onto the bedcover. As soon as I bottom out, I pause. Both of us trying to calm our breathing. My dick was throbbing inside of him, feeling the friction. I take a deep breath and lean more over him. My hand coming up to rub his cheek.

It grounds me, looking into his green eyes, that are almost black with desire. "Move." He whispers. "Move, please."

I smash my lips onto his and experimentally thrust slowly into him.

"AH!" Tarjei breaks away and leans his head back against the bed. "Fuck."

I readjust my hold onto his hip and sit back up. Moving my hips in a slow rhythm, pumping into him to help him adjust through it.  
Groaning out, I try and breathe through it; trying to focus on something other than the fact that I'm barreling towards an early release.  
But I can't stop staring at him. His toned abs flexing every time I get close to his spot. His curls a mess, a sheen of sweat covering his body...He looks absolutely ethereal.

Tarjei suddenly grabs onto my hips, pulling me into him. "Cmon. Fuck me harder." He snaps his eyes to mine, lust winning over any other emotion he may have been holding.

I grab ahold of his thighs, moving his legs up so they curve around my hips. Bring my hands back to his waist; and I start pounding into him. My thrusts hard and fast. The sound of our skin slapping is filling the room.  
And Tarjei.  
Christ.  
I watch as he throws his head back with a shout. He brings up a hand, grasping onto my headboard, knuckles instantly turning white. His other trying to find a place to hold onto my own sweaty skin, settling on my forearm. His dick flopping between us, precome spilling on his stomach.

I slow down slightly and start pushing in, long and with force, grinding my hips once I bottom out. "Tarjei. Fuck. Baby you're so tight." I grunt, not sure if he could even hear me.

He whimpers, his teeth worrying his bottom lip. I snap my hips in a different angle and he cries out; his nails biting into my arm.

I can't fucking believe this. Tarjei is under me; I'm IN him. I'm the reason of the moans and cries of pleasure pouring from of his mouth. I want to savour this, take in all of this as much as I can. But my dick has other ideas.  
I can feel my release starting to build. Shitshitshit. 

I move so that I'm hovered more over him. "Baby." I groan out, the change in position making me push deeper inside him.

His eyes open and it takes a moment for him to focus. When he does, he leans his head up, bringing his hand from my headboard to my hair, pulling as I deepen the kiss. My tongue starts matching my thrusts. Short, hard strokes. Pumping in and out. My senses are on overload. He is everywhere.

"Are-are you close?" I manage to stutter out. My fast breaths fanning over his face.

Tarjei nods. "Yes." He moans. "Fuck. This feels so good."

I pick up my rhythm again. Pulsing in and out, slamming hard against him. Groans and curses and the sound of wet skin covering us.  
I knew the instant I hit his prostate. Tarjei actually screams out. A sound I've never heard before. His back arching, his chest mashed against mine.

I had to bite my tongue to almost draw blood to stop from coming right at that moment.

"GOD FUCK! Right there! Don't stop!" He shouts out. "Oh my god. Henrik! AH Fuck!" He scrambles under me, his hands coming up to clutch onto my back.  
I hold that same position and pound into him, knowing that he's so close and that I'm about 5 thrusts away from blowing my own load.

HIs nails tear down my back, and I prayed that they would leave scars. I lean back and take his cock into my hand. "Come on baby." I moan out, feeling me hit that sensitive spot inside of him. "Let go." I jerk his cock in my hand and within 2 strokes, he's coming. WIth one last shout, his back arches off the bed and his release spurts over his stomach and chest, covering his heaving body. His hands cemented to my back, nails digging in, leaving grooves.

"Henrik." He chokes out.

I had paused while he hit his orgasm, but at his voice; I push hard into him a few more times, feeling his tightness rub against my cock for a few more deep pounding thrusts before I'm coming.  
"Oh god!" I bite my lip and fasten my hold onto his poorly bruised hips. Feel myself fill the condom buried inside him. My body feels like it left the room, my head dizzy. Pleasure still pulsating through me. 

Holy shit.

I feel him trace a hand over my jaw. "You alright?" He mumbles, barely audible.

Turning into his touch, I place a kiss on his palm. "Never been better..also sorry."

His questioning look turns to a grimace as I pull slowly out of him. I take off the full condom, and put it in the bin beside my bed. Then I grab one of my old towels and bring it back over to wipe the come off of his stomach. Throwing that somewhere across the room, I flop down next to him.

"Wow." Tarjei huffs out, voiced sated.

I grin. "Yeah, wow." I turn on my side, facing him. "Did I hurt you?" Shit. What if i was too rough?

Tarjei smirks and turns to face me as well. "My hips are fucked. I probably have more that 3 hickeys on my neck. But.." He reaches out and smooths my furrowing brow. "This has been absolutely worth it."

My growing concerns start to make themselves known in my mind as it gets quiet around us. Its overtaking the buzz we just went through.  
I look down between us. I know it's better we get it all out there now. Before we just dive in, not talking about it.  
I'm about to open my mouth when his voice hits me.

"Can I say something? And will you just listen?" I snap my eyes up to his; his face warm, smiling, nervous. 

I nod.

Tarjei takes a deep breath and lets it out as he rolls onto his back. He closes his eyes. "I'm pretty sure I fell in love with you at your audition."

I feel like the air got sucked out of me. My audition?

"Well" He lets out a laugh. "Maybe not in 'love' with you at that point. But surely enough that from that moment we met, you took a part of me." He opens his eyes and brings a hand to search for mine. I meet him halfway and interlock our fingers between us. "Henrik, I don't know what it is about us. I really don't. And I STILL don't. But every day, every time we were together. It grew. It grew into this rare thing that I couldn't escape from. And I buried it for so long, H. I didn't want to act on it. " He rolls back onto his side, facing me again. "I had told myself that this wasn't realistic. That things like this don't happen to people. I had told myself that this was all going to end when filming ends. That you'd never want to be with..you know, just a coworker. Because who knew what emotions were ours and what was just carried over from Isak's and Even's right?"

Tarjei distangles our hands and reaches over to push the hair behind my ear. "So I fought it. Stuffed it down. I didn't want to deal with it. I just wanted to follow your original plan of 'living in the moment' with each other. Because I figured, as long as I had that....I could be fine when this inevitabley ended." He smiles, tracing his fingers over my face, the sensation almost leaving burns in their wake against my skin. "But then I decided to try and be all method actor and force us to not have contact.. Which, sorry, again."

"Dont be." I croak out. "I understood why you did, and in the long run it even helped me with Even so. Sucked but was great, I suppose."

Tarjei drops his hand back between us and I clasp it back with mine. "Still, sorry. I also had thought that it would help me detach from you. That distancing myself would help ease the pain when this was all over." He clears his throat, a slight blush covering his face and neck. "And that also backfired on me, because then I couldn't shake you from my mind. I would do a scene with Even, but all I saw was you." He lets out a soft laugh. "And it pissed me off to no end too. I felt like I wasn't delivering the scenes well enough, and then fucking Saturday night-"

I cut him off. "You don't have to tell me Tarjei. I kinda...figured it out."

Tarjei sighs. "How?"

"I had my assumptions but our argument earlier solidified it."

"Of course." He rolls his eyes at me. "Well just for the record, that doesn't happen often. But like I said, I just couldn't shake you, so you blended with Even. And I imagined you in that scene instead of him and I..went too deep." He shrugs. "Also it didn't help that Julie knew exactly what to say to me to get me to break down like that."

"Our fearless leader." I laugh.

"Really though. I'm going to be sad not working with her when this is over." Tarjei's thumb rubs against mine, softly.

The comfortable silence descends on us. I watch as Tarjei stares at our hands, his eyes following every slight movement they make.

God, this boy. Everything he's said has been like a flame under my skin. I didn't know he felt any of that. That THAT was what he's been feeling.  
This whole time. And here I was, having my own battles. Forcing myself to try and be aloof. But I'm pretty sure I fell faster than he did.

"Can I talk now?" I grin at him as he jumps from my voice breaking the silence.

"Shit. Yeah dude. Sorry I zoned out." He blushes again. Fuck he is so cute. "Just, I'm sorry that I never told you any of this earlier. I mean, I dunno whether it would've made situations better or worse but." He picks up our hands and kisses the back of mine. "I'm glad you know now. That I uh..love you. and yeah."

" 'And yeah' ? Very romantic." I tease. Tarjei buries his face deeper into the pillows. I can see the red on his neck.  
"I'm kidding." I chuckle, placing my hand in his messy curls. I slowly drag my fingers through, relishing in their softness.

"I fell in love with you the day we first kissed."

Tarjei's mouth drops open. "What?"

I smile at him. "Thats where it rooted. You captivated me, Tarjei. I couldn't get enough of you. I could've watched you speak for hours, still can. You lit up when you become so passionate about things. I wanted a taste, a touch, anything.. from you. And when you finally kissed me..." I let out a content sigh. "Fuck man, I could barely stand. You took ahold of me. Right there. Your lips pressed against mine and all I could think about was how RIGHT it felt. How natural."

I slide my body closer to his, putting one hand on his naked waist, pulling him towards me. He sighs as he nuzzles into my collarbones, his warm breath sending goosebumps over my skin. I place a kiss on top of his head. "I'm sorry about what i've said in the past. To not worry and to just 'act on how we felt'. I see now how stupid that kinda was." 

"Wasn't stupid." I hear Tarjei's muffled voice from below me.

"Thanks, but it kinda was." I sigh again. "I dunno. I just..well, I didnt want to face it. either. Didn't want to accept that I was falling in love with my coworker. I didn't want to hurt you unintentionally in someway..so I tried to stay aloof. Tried to live with the boundaries we set, or lack of. " I feel him laugh quietly and I press him closer to me. "I guess...." I start tracing patterns over his exposed back. "I guess I just knew if I gave into this, that maybe, I was going to be the one that got hurt. That maybe I was the only one who felt this strongly."

Tarjei hums. I feel him kiss my collarbone. "You weren't. I'm sorry I didnt show it more."

"I know..I know. And I'm sorry that I'm such a flirt. I'm surprised I wasn't obvious with how I felt."

"Maybe you were and I was just terrified to see it as it was." Tarjei shrugs. "We're idiots."

A full belly laugh bursts out of me and I pull back to look at him. "We really are. But hey, at least we're on track now."

Tarjei raises his eyebrows. "No more secrets? Things about the season you know that I dont?"

"Cross my heart, T. We're on the same level of knowledge now...but sorry again about-"

"Shut up." Tarjei leans up and kisses me. I smile into it, before moving my lips gently against his.

He pulls away first, his 3 dimpled smile plastered on his face. I place one more kiss on his lips before moving to lay down. Pulling him into my side, his head half on my shoulder and half on my chest; I move my arm around him to still be able to reach to play with his hair.  
Our favourite cuddle position.

The sounds of the night start to make themselves known. Sirens, cars passing by. Dogs barking. My neighbors next door who's clearly fallen asleep with the tv on loud again. Cat's knocking down bins.  
But none of that affects us. None of that breaks through our bubble. This world of ours where we've just read a part of our soul to the other. Shared intimacy.  
I'm scared to shatter it. To come back to reality. But...what has even changed? How is this any different than how we've been? If anything we're alot closer now, maybe this can propel us to-

"This feels weird." Tarjei's voice breaks my thoughts.

I pause my hand in his hair, my heart pounding. "Uh..how so?" Oh god. Does he already have regrets?

He surprises me when he chuckles, his hand on my chest, searing my skin. "Weird in the fact that I feel like nothing is really changing. Like, we don't really have to change how we are around each other. If anything we can interact even more."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." I laugh as I bring a hand through my hair. "I kid you not, that was EXACTLY what I was thinking about."

"Bullshit."

"I swear!""

"Well..fuck. Natural connection or some shit then isn't it?" He raises his head and winks at me.

I roll my eyes at him fondly and continue playing with his hair. "Some shit like that yeah." 

Tarjei turns his head in and kisses my chest. "Natural connection." He mutters.

We touch each others skin in lingering caresses. Silence envelops us once more. Only this time I feel myself start to drift off. The comfort of my situation too irresistible. My mind winds down. We crossed a border tonight. A border that was inevitably begging to be crossed. We jumped, and we caught the other. I have Tarjei in my arms. Tarjei. Who came apart under me tonight. Who stated he loves me. Who has been like a light, a light showing me that this is the right path to take. And I was to stupid to see it, to let it guide me.  
And I can't believe that he chose me. All those months ago. He. Chose. Me.

"Even is bipolar." Tarjei's voice barely a murmur.

I plant a kiss on his forehead. "He is." I sigh, reaching down to pull the blanket over us.

More silence. Eyes drooping shut, I feel him snuggle into my side. 

A minute more.

"Hey boyfriend?" I hear him whisper.

"Mmm?" I hum in response, too tired to open my eyes. 

"I love you." 

A grin overtakes me as butterflies fill my stomach. I press him even closer to me, almost becoming as one.  
"I love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just fyi, the next chapter will be covering ALOT....like ALOT. So please be patient with me if I dont get it out in a week alright?  
> also.  
> I did a poll on twitter and the majority said you wanted Henriks POV for the hotel room.  
> And that scene is going to be covered next chapter, which would be Tarjei's POV.  
> Now, I can make this work. I can either; cut the chapter in half?  
> OR  
> I could switch POV's in the chapter?
> 
> Let me know your thoughts!  
> either in the comments or come chat with me on twitter. (snapbackskam)
> 
> THANK YOU XX


	13. The Second Time It Happens: Tarjei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HALLLOOOO  
> I'm back!
> 
> I'm sorry I haven't updated...long story short; i've just been so busy and there was a lot going on.  
> shitty excuse i know, but I'm sorry.
> 
> Couple of things though; in lieu of recent comments and such,  
> I just want to reiterate, once again, that while yes I do ship Henjei, I would NEVER force it upon them. Ever. I respect that Henrik has a girlfriend, and I respect Tarjei and Henriks personal life. What they do, who they date, etc etc, is their own business. I don't harass family members or friends or significant others.  
> I just ship them. Plain and simple. Thats it.
> 
> ALSO,  
> I am a Tarjei stan.( I thought most people knew this) but that doesn't mean i don't like Henrik? I adore Henrik. I think he is phenomenally talented and incredibly good looking(SERIOUSLY HIS JAWLINE, I SWOON). I love that man. and i will ademently follow his future endeavors and career path.
> 
> okay, i'm off my soapbox. Sorry. I just wanted to get that off my chest.
> 
> SO THIS CHAPTER:  
> Since you lot voted to have Henriks POV for the Hotel scene, this chapter is the events leading up to that.  
> Note: This chapter gets a bit cheesy...i mean, they just admitted their love so yeah, they're gonna be smitten. Let that 'drunk on love' take bloom for a bit. 
> 
> quick recap:  
> They're in the middle of the week, filming ep 6.  
> Tarjei discovered Even is bipolar and got angry at Henrik for keeping info from him.  
> They argue and then both admit their feelings for the other.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you all so much for being patient and kind to me.  
> I'll try to be more consistent with my updates :) 
> 
> -V

It's like I blinked and suddenly its Friday. 

It's been a whirlwind of moments since I woke up next to Henrik after opening up to each other.

He hadn't been in the bed when I woke up, which caused my doubts to cloud my mind. I was about to scramble for my discarded clothes when he had walked back into his bedroom; towel around his waist, body gleaming and he was whistling.

My racing thoughts had stilled as he turned towards me, took one look, and grinned.

"I'm gladly going to take whatever shit Julie has in store for me after she see's you." He bit his lip. "Especially from here on out because..." He had trailed off, his eyes roamed my half exposed body. "because those bruises and bite marks aren't going to go away any time soon."

My brain snapped out of its stupor and I looked down; accessing the deep bruises of what looks like the outlines of fingers on my hips. I felt a jolt rush through me as I take in the trail of hickeys along my chest and collarbones; I raised a hand to my neck, felt the sensitive raw marks imprinted on it.

I couldn't keep the smile from growing on my face. Fuck..yeah Julie is going to be pissed.

Henrik had winked, looking smug as he turned around towards his closet to grab his work clothes.  
I just sat there, on his bed with his duvet tucked around my waist, breathing; waiting for the airwaves to shift. For the awkwardnesss to set in. To have him start to act differently.  
But once he had changed, he bounded over and plopped down next to me; immediately running one of his hands through my hair and pulling me to connect our lips softly.

"I'm glad I got to kiss you goodbye." Henrik whispered. "I'm sorry that I have to go to work so early.." He traced my lips. "But actually YOU have school in about an hour." His thumb rubbing against my cheek. "Feel free to steal some of my clothes." He leaned back in and gave me another kiss, and by this time my brain had finally began functioning again and I met him halfway; placing my hand on his thigh, the other fisting his shirt, trying to bring him closer. He huffed in surprise and let out a laugh against my needy mouth. I couldn't help the smile that formed on my own as we broke apart.

"You won't get them back." I teased, pulling out my shit-eating grin.

Henrik just laughed again, his eyes crinkling. "Isn't that the point?" He cocked an eyebrow at me before reconnecting our lips, pulling away and standing up. "I'll text you alright? Have a great day, babe."

My heart had fluttered at the pet name, and remembering that we crossed all the borders last night; I decided to not hold back.

"You too." I cleared my throat. "I love you." It tumbled out of my mouth as he lingered in the doorway.

The fluttering erupts in my chest as I take in those 3 words. I relished the raw feeling inside me, at the level of depth I feel for him, and how I had felt this way for a long time 

"I love you too."

The smile that he had given me was enough to carry me throughout my day and into the night. And into the next day, where I had surprised him at KB; before I was rewarded with another one.

The last couple of days, the strongest emotion I was feeling was relief. Relief that things were more or less the same. It was like nothing had changed between us, but yet everything changed.  
Granted, yes it has only been a short while..but to me, it felt like we were miles from how we were before. Like we grew. Grew closer; the chemistry between us was more thick, palpable. We grew more fond of each other, savouring the reassurance that we were both, finally, on the exact same page. That the other feels just as strong for the other.  
Relief, that he didnt run when I admitted my feelings. Relief that we can still be shits to each other. Relief that when I catch him looking at me, its the same look he has on his face as it has been since the beginning.

It's been exhilarating.

And incredibly distracting.

"Dude, for real, where are you today?" Marlons voice breaks into my thoughts.

I startle and glance over at him, feeling that stupid blush on my cheeks before I clear my throat, "Sorry, what were you saying?"  
I take in whats around me and see that the crew is still setting up the cameras. Good, glad I didn't zone out during the scene.

Marlon waves his hand around. "Well, I was trying to tell you about this sick new band I've been listening too but you were off in space-land."

A huff comes out of me, "I was listening! New band?" 

"Fuck off." Marlon grins and raises a bushy eyebrow. "Whats up with you?"

I almost want to smile. Since Skam began, Marlon and I have grown very close. He really is like Jonas in the sense that he can figure me out more quickly than even some of my friends.  
He pointedly looks at my scarf and I adjust it to make sure that it's covering my still-visible hickeys.  
Thank fuck Julie approved of Isak wearing a scarf today.

I shrug. "Just been busy with filming and schoolwork."

"And avoiding your friends."

This time I do roll my eyes. "I'm not avoiding anyone. I've just been busy."

"So hanging with Henrik, then." It wasn't a question.

A smile escapes me before I try to cover it up with pursing my lips. "Hmm. Maybe." I shrug again, trying to be nonchalant.

Marlon looks at me for a long moment, brows almost furrowed, as though he's reading everything I'm not saying. I notice a loose thread on my jeans and I start picking it, I don't really want to look at him and have it given away by a look on my face.

"About fucking time."

I snap my head up to him and see a massive grin taking over his face. I almost choke on my air intake. "What?!"

"Dude, you've both been gone for each other since like... the first table read."

"What?...No?? Just..." I close my fluttering mouth before opening it once more. "Fuck off." I don't know what else to say. My mind is racing with how apparently obvious Henrik and I have been. 

Well, I guess we never really did try to hide it.  
I smile to myself. We tend to forget other people are around when we're with each other.

Marlon chuckles. "Hey man, I'm stoked about it. We all kinda saw this coming. I mean, you can't fake what's between you two; on screen or in real life."

I suppress a groan. "What do you mean, 'we all'?? As in...?" I raise my eyebrow at him in question.

"Literally everyone. You two aren't subtle. Like at all." Marlon snorts.

"The fuck-"

"Okay. We fixed it. One day we'll have a big budget right? And get new cameras right?" Julie is suddenly in front of us, her blonde hair a billowy mess. I don't know whether she was talking to herself or us in her apparent frazzled state, so I ignore her questions. 

Marlon seems to have the same idea because he nods to what she's holding. "Those for us?" 

Julie places a kebab tray on both of our laps. "Yeah, now lets start filming. I want to finish this scene before it gets dark."

I nod and reach up to adjust my blue beanie. I was actually really excited to shoot this scene. A big one.  
Isak coming out to Jonas. Finally. Isak is tearing down that last wall inside of him and admitting to someone that he likes boys. Well...a boy, at least.  
And Isak is so on edge, so scared of what Jonas will think..and it goes better than he could've imagined.  
I just couldn't wait to feel those nerves course through his veins, couldn't wait to let out that laugh of relief when Jonas doesn't even blink an eye. To have that slimmer of hope when he finds Even's drawing in his pocket.

"Its cold." Marlons whining voice drags me out of my thoughts.

I watch as Julie carefully rises both her brows towards him. "We're not Hollywood here. I'm not wasting our budget just so that you can have a new kebab for time we have to reshoot this scene." She turns her cold stare towards me. "And you? Any complaints or can you two stop bitching so that we can do our jobs?" She turns and quickly walks towards the monitors behind us.

"The fuck..." I whisper. "Do you know what her deal is?" 

Marlon shakes his head. "No. But lets focus. I don't want to get more on her bad side than I already am."

I nod and push away Julie's mood away from my mind. There'd be time for that later.  
I close my eyes for a moment and bring out Isak. His fear. How tired he is, tired of hiding, tired of faking. Ready to be out to the one person who's been there for him.  
But mostly....He is absolutely terrified.

"Action!"

\---

_Henrik: My boss sent my coworker Claire home early today. Guess why._

I grin as I sit on the tram headed back home, still slightly drained from the scene today.

**Okay. Why?**

_Henrik: Because she didn't want to miss this weeks 'fredag clip'. Can you believe it?_

_Henrik: So here I am. Forced to close the cafe tonight by myself because the girl was allowed to go home early to watch a show....that I appear in._

_Henrik: I would laugh at this irony if i wasn't so annoyed_

A giggle bursts through my mouth as I read his texts.

**Stop being a diva.**

_Henrik: Wait, did you mean to send that to me? Or were you looking in a mirror and then accidentally typing out what you were saying outloud?_

**Shut up. But really, that is fucking funny! I mean, I understand though. Tonights clip has a huge moment.**

_Henrik: Thats true._

_Henrik: You kissing me weird while underwater..huge..huge moment for me. I may need some time to recover._

My tram stops and I grin at my phone as I get off and start down the street to my house.

**Oh my god.**

**I'm not explaining that again. Also why the fuck do I put up with you?**

_Henrik: Simple. You love me._

My heart stutters in my chest as I read those words. The way they affect me still baffles my mind. Because I'm still not used to it. Not used to having us be in our usual banter and teasing and then have him drop something like that. So casual. Just because he can. Because I want him too. Because he knows i do.

**Diva.**

**And I do.**

_Henrik: Love you too <3 _

_Henrik: Oh god. A tourist bus just stopped across the street. This is my end Tarjei. Nice knowing you._

**Thats all I get as a goodbye? The fuck. Guess I'll only drink half a beer in honour of you then.**

_Henrik: Well I can't damn well sing a song of lament now could I?_

_Henrik: No but I have to go. I'll text you when I'm on my way to your house._

**Good luck. Hope you survive. I need you in one piece.**

I'm about to put my phone back into my pocket when it dings again, to my surprise. 

_Henrik: I will be. I haven't seen you since yesterday. That's too fucking long._

The smile plastered across my face is almost hurting my cheeks. I slip my phone back into my pocket as I continue down the walk towards my house. The few people milling about giving me strange looks as they pass. At this point though, I almost just don't care.  
I'm happy. Happier than i've been in a long time...maybe even ever. And all because of a boy who showed up to audition for a show that I'm in.  
Fuck...The fact that Henrik integrated himself into my life so naturally, like he belonged there. And he does.  
And for weeks, he and I were too careful, too cautious to break whatever we already had. Scared to disrupt the course of our 'relationship'.

But we did. We took that chance and broke it.  
And it turned out better than either of us could imagine.

I shove my hands in my pocket as my smile finally softens.  
I took some of that today. Took it and portrayed it into Isak. Tried to convey the fear, the fear of changing how his life already was. Then incorporated the relief; relief that someone understood and was on his side.

God, I love my job.

"Isak!"

Out of pure routine reaction, my head snaps up and looks towards the sound. A boy and a girl were crossing the street towards me. My eyes flicker to my house 3 houses down, debating if I should run for it... but I'm in too good of a mood to be rude tonight. I just hope this goes well.

"Hi!" The girl excitedly says as soon as they reach me, her eyes wide. "Oh my god. Isak! It's really you!" 

Wait what.

I clear my throat. "I'm not-"

"Skam is our favourite show. We honestly have such anxiety watching it. Waiting for each new clip or text or something." The boy steps in, his own overly excited voice growing faster. "And we were actually just on our way home to hole out in hopes a clip will drop sometime tonight." He looks at me expectantly.

I smile at them, hoping it didn't look fake. "Thats really nice. I'm glad you both like the show." They nod and look like they're about to speak again so I press on quickly. "But uh..I'm not Isak. You...uh..you know that people on the show are just actors playing characters."

The girls face drops. "Oh? Really?" She looks over to the boy. "We..we thought that it was based off true stories of each of your lives."

"Um." How do i go about this without revealing much? Ugh. Henrik is alot better with words. "Kinda? Like the writer of the show sometimes will use stories of real people."

"Oh." The boy speaks. "I see."

Okay this is just way to awkward now. "Yeah but, hey. The show is important to alot of people. The stories are important. Don't let this distract you from that." There. Hopefully I redeemed myself a bit from being an asshole.

It works. They both brighten up. "Oh we wont!" says the girl. "This show means way to much to us. I just feel stupid because it seems obvious now that of course you just play characters."

"Dont..dont feel stupid." I mutter out. "Its alright. I get called Isak all the time. Its like second nature to answer now." They both beam at me and I almost flush under the attention. "but uh..you guys should head home shouldnt you?" I glance at the time on my phone. "I mean, I could be wrong. But I have a good feeling that the clip possibly might drop within the next...oh....20minutes or so?"

They gasp and shout goodbye at me as they scamper off.  
I stare after them for a moment. Replaying our conversation in my mind.  
Its not like I dont like 'fans', Its just...weird. I still am not fully comfortable interacting with them. 

"Hey fucker."

I jump as David and Rumen screech up to me, sitting on Davids bike.

"The fuck dude." I zip up my hoodie a bit more and put my hands in my pockets. "Whats up?"

"Well, if you'd ever check your phone; we're going over to Shauns to pregame. You coming?" David asks. 

"I'm-"

"Cmon, don't bail this time Tj." Rumen cuts in. "We barely see you anymore."

I almost roll my eyes. "You see me at school every fucking day." I run a hand through my hair before checking the time again. Alright. Henrik gets off at 23. I have time to hang with my friends before he comes to my house. I look up at their expectant faces.

"Fine. I'll come pregame but i'm not going to the party."

David grins. "Sweet man. Sounds good." 

I see Rumen rolls his eyes before reaching out and landing a punch to my arm. "Ow? Thanks asshole." I flip him off as we start down the street. 

"You've been missing the gym these last few days. Stop slacking." Rumen retorts with a shit-eating grin.

My eyes go clear up to my skull. "Whatever. Fill me in on the latest drama with the guys so that I'm prepared to deal with them."

\---

"Alfred, get off your phone." Jakob throws a pillow across the room and we all watch as it hits Alfred, perfectly knocking his phone from his hands.

"The fuck Jake." Alfred grumbles, bending down to grab it and finish his text. "Just because I'm the only one out of us to be in a relationship..."

"Eh, Not quite." It's out of my mouth before I even realise.  
I've only had one beer since we arrived. But it was so nice to just chill out with my friends. I've been so busy lately that its been relaxing to hang and listen to them shit on each other all evening. Relishing that sense of comfort that I crave so much in this ever-growing roller coaster of 'fame'. 

"Wait. What?" Shaun is the first to speak. 

"Shut up!" Jakob hisses. Then he nods at me. "What the fuck? Spill."

I see David shuffle and glance over to find him with his chin in his hand, a grin spreading over his face. He catches my eye, and he nods knowingly. "Yeah T, spill."

I hate all of them sometimes.

I let out a laugh. "Jesus, you guys are acting like I've never been with someone before."

Rumen rolls his eyes, "Bro, no offense, but since you were like 15 I don't think we've seen you NOT be hooking up with a different person each weekend for this long."

"Sure, make me sound like the biggest fuckboy." I huff.

"You were." David interjects.

I glare at him for a moment before shrugging. "Fine. Maybe I was. But that doesn't matter now." I clear my throat. "So uh... you all know that I've been hanging with Henrik alot lately-"

"I FUCKING KNEW IT!" Shaun smacks the edge of the sofa and turns towards Alfred. "I told you! I damn well told you!" 

Alfred flips him off as Jakob speaks up. "Old news, T. We literally caught you two making out in the bathroom at that party. Or did you forget that detail?"

"If you'd all shut the fuck up then I would tell you." I grin at them before taking another swig of my beer. "Basically.." I hesitate, not wanting to give too much detail but enough to fill them in. "Uh, Henrik and I kinda opened up to each other and admitted our feelings for the other." I shrug again. "And yeah. Its been pretty chill." I take another long swig. "Also we fucked."

"Dude." Rumen groans as I laugh and look to see Jakob beaming at me.

"Its about time." David says, a smirk playing over his face. "We've all been waiting for ages for this to happen. Us as your friends AND the rest of the cast." 

"Yes I heard." I reach my leg out to try and kick him over. "Marlon mentioned it, fuck all of you for being so invested."

"Tj, after people watch the final clip of this week, no one in probably all of Norway would be surprised over the fact that you and Henrik have something outside of filming." David nods at me and takes a drink.

"Oh shit!" Shaun stands up quickly and grabs his laptop . "I almost forgot about the clip! Its out right? Lets watch it."

I can't help but scoff at the sight of them, crowding around the small screen. As much as they annoy me, I do love my friends. How they treat me just the same as the rest of the guys. Or how they allow me to be quiet and soak in the atmosphere around them, drinking in the sense of normalcy. 

David moves and sits next to me on the couch, nudging my knee with his. "I'm glad you and Henrik are figuring it out. I really do love the guy. Plus you're really happy around him and he clearly adores you. And thats great..but." He looks down at his bottle. "I mean..you guys are in this for the right reasons right? LIke you've talked about after filming stops?" He looks back up at me, an eyebrow raised.

A sharpness fills my chest but I swallow, forcing it away. "Yes." I spit. "Its not just some constant hooking up, David. He actually..." I clear my throat again and lower my voice. "He told me he loves me..so." I grasp onto the bottle tighter as I take a drink.

Both of Davids eyebrows are near his hairline. "Oh? Wow." He leans back into the couch. "Shit. Well fuck me. I'll shut up then." 

I smirk and try to shove him over. "Yeah. Fuck you." 

"Tj not taking his shirt off as soon as he saw the pool is the most unrealistic thing i've seen." Alfred's loud voice floats over to us. The rest of the boys laugh.

Once again, my eyes roll up in to my head as I down the rest of my beer with a fond smile.

\---

"Henrik is so great. He always smells so good. I love wearing his hoodies. And he's so tall! He is so tall! Taller than me! No one is ever taller than me. I like it. I like that he's tall." I proudly slur to the person walking down the street with me. Who was it? Oh. I think Jakob? Or maybe David. I don't remember much after the....the...fuck...I don't know how many beers I drank. But we were celebrating. Why were we celebrating? Oh!  
"OH! And we were celebrating!" I lean into the mystery person..who smells really good. Fuck. I raise my head to see who it was but I couldn't focus on all 7 of them. "You smell good."

"So I've been told. What were you celebrating?" Came the voice. A deep voice. I know this voice. How do I know this voice?

"Kissing in the pool. Which I did. With Henrik. OH! That I like Henrik." I smile as I tip my head back to look up at the sky. "He's so great you know? Plus I think he likes me back. He told me. Shhhh." I feel us come to a stop and I vaguely comprehend the stranger opening up a door and guiding us inside before shutting and locking it. I look around and grasp bits of the room to realise we were in my basement. "Oh. I live here."

A chuckle. "Mmhmm. You do." A hand intertwines with mine as I allow myself to be pulled towards what looks like a bed.

I sit down happily. "Henrik sleeps in my bed sometimes. That's pretty great too." 

A cup gets placed into my hand, "Please drink this. You'll feel better." The deep voice is so calming that I do what it says. Another chuckle. "You know, if I had known that you get like this when you're really drunk...I would've bought you all the alcohol you want. Because you're so fucking cute right now."

The empty glass gets taken out of my hand and I again try to focus on the person in front of me. "You're tall. Henriks tall. I like that about him. His lips are soft. I miss him." The focus is starting to make my head spin. Fuck. I give up and lean back onto the bed to let out a sigh. "I'm tired."

"Do you want to get out of your jeans first?" The voice asks.

I shake my head slowly, trying to calm the slight spinning. "No. But will you lay next to me?"

A pause. "Do you know who I am?" 

The spinning gets worse and I press my palms into my eyes. "I can't think. I can't see. Please lay next to me."

I hear shuffling and then the bed move. I gasp as arms pull me up to lay me on a clothed chest, a hand tracing my back, a hand through my hair. "Is this okay?" a murmur.

"Feels good." I mutter, giving into the touches, letting it distract from my clouded mind. I try to pay attention to the breaths the body under me takes, letting it set the pace to hopefully slow the spins.  
After a few minutes, or hours, or days, the spinning stops and is replaced with a dull pain, the start of a pounding headache I'm guaranteed for when I wake up tomorrow. Ugh. Why did I even drink so much? Wait. The pool clip? And.......Henrik? That we were getting together? I think. Shit. I need to stop sorting this out. I'll deal with it tomorrow.

I let out a content sigh and settle into this surprisingly comfortable chest. The hand movements never ceasing in their attempt to relax me. I hear a little breathy laugh and him press me even closer and it all hits me. I can feel the blush spread over my face and I stay very still to avoid detection.  
Its Henrik. Im laying on Henrik. Henrik is holding me. Fuck. I can't even attempt to wonder what bullshit I had spouted at him. Ugh. Another thing I'll deal with tomorrow.

Another sigh escapes me. And i'm just about to give into the blackness, I hear him whisper.

"Hey boyfriend..." his lips pressed into the top of my head. "I love you."

It takes everything I have left in me to not react, to stay still. As much as I want to kiss him right now, I don't want to risk my head splitting open. I almost want to not do anything at all, keep him thinking that I'm asleep. But....he's here. Holding me. Calming me. I don't want him to think I won't remember how sweet he was tonight. I may not remember much, but I know I'll remember this.

My eyes shut on their own and I feel myself falling, and right before the edge...."I love you, Henrik" before diving into blackness.

\---

When I awake, I don't move. My head to behind my eyes is in searing pain. I'm scared that if I open them, I'll scream. Trying to ease my breathing, I slide my hand around to take in my surroundings. It collides with something soft, I move it; feeling...a tshirt? and a chest-Oh.  
Last night crashes down on my mind and I let out a quiet groan. Shit. He probably thinks I"m annoying and a bother and-

A kiss placed to my forehead stops my thoughts. "Good morning babe. I know you're probably dying, so when you're ready, I have a glass of water and orange juice and an entire bottle of pain reliever for you when you feel up to it."

I grunt out my response. My hand sliding down his arm to squeeze his hand in a thank you. He squeezes right back before settling to rub his thumb over the back of my hand.

I take 3 more deep breaths before slowly opening my eyes. It wasn't very light in my room. The blinds were apparently still covered with my dark grey curtains. As soon as my eyelids are fully up, I search for his face.  
He's laying on his side next to me. One arm propping his head up, his other hand holding mine still. His hair is down and messy and soft. I reach over to brush some off of his forehead; letting my hand trail down to trace his lips before letting it drop back to the bed. His sky-blue eyes are clear and bright, amusement growing inside. 

"Hi." I mumble, my embarassment from last night coming back in full swing.

"Hi boyfriend." Henriks lip turn up into a gentle smile.

I slowly turn my head to face him. "What time is it?"

Henrik reaches beside him and checks the time on his phone. "Almost 14."

"Shit. Seriously?" I groan. "I was supposed to help my mum today. She's gonna be so pissed."

"Nah. She's actually more amused after I talked to her."

"You talked to her?"

Henrik grins. "Well yeah? I went upstairs to grab some things for you and your mum was awake and making coffee." He chuckles. "It's not like I've never talked to your mum before Tarjei."

I want to roll my eyes but that would be catastrophic so I let out a huff. "Yeah but...ugh. Nevermind. I dont fucking know. My head hurts." 

"Here" Henrik disentangles our hands and sits up, reaching for the juice and shaking out a pill. "Can you sit up a bit and drink some of this?"

I grit my teeth and move my body to settle more against my headboard, placing my shoulders and back of my head against it.

"Good." Henrik nods his head, handing me the juice and pill which I take gratefully; downing the entire glass and handing it back to him.

"Thank you." I mutter. Henrik smiles and puts the glass back on my bedside table. I take in a deep breath as he settles back next to me, reaching for my hand again.

Better get this over with now.

I clear my throat. "So..uh...Was..was I soft drunk or party drunk?"

Henrik's eyebrows go up in amusement. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, when I get really drunk...I only have two moods. So was I like..flirty and cheesy and clingy and touchy and whiney? Or was I wanting to go out and dance or do a dare or couldn't sit still or go on some random adventure or..." I lick my lips nervously.

His smile broadens. "Then you were soft drunk. Definietly."

I let out a moan. "Oh. Great." Well, let the embarassment begin.

Henrik lets out a bark of a laugh. "What? I thought you were absolutely adorable. You didn't even know that I was the one that came and got you. You kept leaning into me and telling me I smelled good." He smirks. "And you kept talking about me."

I shut my eyes as I feel my face burn. His fingers touch my cheek and I nearly jump opening them back up to find him looking at me with adoration. "Seriously babe. Dont be embarassed. You were so fucking cute, I could barely handle it." He brings up our intertwined hands and places a kiss to mine. "You were so sweet. Talking about how you liked I was tall and that you missed me and stuff."

I feel a grin tugging on the corners of my mouth. "Well...I guess thats alright then." My grin widens. "Be glad it wasn't party drunk..I'm not sure you can handle me like that."

Henriks mouth opens in mock offense. "I bet I can. And I will! I can't wait to meet party drunk Tarjei. He sounds interesting." 

"I wont let you. I'm not getting drunk ever again." I groan.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that."

"Fuck you." I sigh. 

Henrik starts playing with my fingers. "Speaking of parties though, there's this big one coming up next week, my friends are all going. Wanna come with me?"

"Dude. I'm dying. Can you ask me when I'm alive?" I smile at him as I carefully shuffle back down to my bed.

"Oh yeah. Sorry of course." He lays down and slowly moves over to me. "Can i..." He gestures with his hands.

I nod before thinking and almost cry at the movement. "Ouch. Shit. Yeah just be slow please."

Henrik leans over and gently slides me to him, letting my head rest against his shoulder. HIs arm around my head, carding his hands through my mess of hair. The sensation instantly soothing.

We lay in silence for a moment. Enjoying the feeling of the other before I open my mouth. "But yes, Henrik. I'll go to the party with you."

I can almost hear his smile as I feel his lips press against my forehead. "Cool. Plus, we have that kitchen scene to shoot the next morning. So. win win." He laughs softly, obviously taking care to not jostle me. "Just as long as you don't go get shit faced again."

"Fuck off." I lean slowly and place a kiss to his shoulder. "Also..thank you." I finish quietly. 

Henrik says nothing, just pulls me closer to him with another kiss and we settle back into our positions.  
And even with one of the biggest hangovers of my life, being in Henriks arms felt like the only place where I should be.

\---

"You need to wear black more often. You look so good right now."

"I wear black??"

"But do you wear a black graphic tshirt with a snapback?"

"Carl, you only said I needed to wear more black. Not an entire ensemble." I grumble. 

"Accept the compliment and take the advice please. Now." Carl claps and rubs his hands together. "You and Henrik finally stopped being stupid."

I couldn't help but let out a laugh. "Well we admitted our feelings for each other yeah." I scratch the back of my head and look over to see Josephine chatting with Julie on the other side of the kollectiv kitchen. I've been debating with the idea of letting Julie know about Henrik and I.....But then again...

"I'm really happy for you T. I think this could be a really good thing..for both of you." Carl smiles at me. "It'll be fun filming on saturday with all of us. Not that the chemistry between you two has changed, I'm sure." He scoffs. "If anything, it's probably going to be heightened now that its at peak boyfriend status."

I take off the snapback and smooth down my hair before replacing it. "We're not um, boyfriends."

Carl cocks a quizzical brow towards me. "What do you mean?"

"We've never really talked about...like the details and stuff." I shrug. "Which I'm cool with. I mean as long as he and I know that we love the other then-"

"Oh shit you've already said your 'i love yous'?" Carl looks almost impressed. "I know you and he barely acknowledge other people when you're near each other...but i didn't know you were at that serious level" He pulls at his bottom lip in thought. "Is it serious then? Something thats gonna thrive after all this?" He gestures around the bustling room.

I'm almost annoyed. "Why do people think that Henrik and I are just fucking around until the camera stops rolling?" I snap. "We talk and hang out outside of filming. We're not Isak and Even every damn minute."

""You know what?" Carl chuckles. "You're right. I shouldn't pry into his and yours business. I'm sorry."

"Well now I feel like a dick so dont apologise. But also thank you?" I grin at him.

Carl reaches out and gives my shoulder a firm squeeze before letting go. "Okay. Now back to important things, like Isak and Eskild. Lets run lines really quick."

\---

_Henrik: Fuck. Tell Julie sorry that I'm late. I'll be there in 10._

I try to hide my growing amusement as I shove my phone in Julie's face and watch her read the message. 

"Ugh. That kid. Whatever. We'll deal with that when he gets here. In the meantime.." She turns and addresses the camera crew. "Lets work on the shots of Isak slamming the door behind his friends then hearing Even knock and working up to go answer the door." They all nod and start moving, she spins back to me. "Sound alright? You're in that mindset? Do you need help getting to that mindspace?"

I nod at her. "Yeah, I'm good here."  
David, Sacha and Marlon had just left set about 5 minutes ago. Henrik was supposed to be here even a half hour before that.  
Tonight was one of those pivotal shoots. The reunion of Isak and Even.

Surprisingly, I wasn't that nervous about this scene. I'm more excited to fill up Isak with excitement and hope. Disbelief that Even is there, that he showed up to Isak's flat..minutes after the text. This will be the moment where Isak allows himself to have what he's always wanted. To let go completely and let desire take over. To touch and kiss and mark and feel...a boy. A boy who wants him just as bad.

Not to mention, all we're filming to day is just us making out. Which is something we're very good at with each other. Plus we get go through the act of taking our clothes off and having Henrik go down on me.  
A smirk escapes me. Should be a fun night.

We film Isak lingering by the back door and then answering the door for Even twice before Henrik shows up. Hair a mess, face shiny and lips red. Fuck, it just wasn't fair how me managed to still look hot as shit.  
Julie throws him into makeup and wardrobe and he got done in record time. She herds us into the opening positions with him outside the door.

I haven't seen him since the day before where he met me at Nissen after I was done shooting. Then normally we get in character together, but tonight we have literally no time. All i've recieved from him is a bright smile. And Im longing for him. I need to kiss him, need him to just say a word to me so that I can focus. Channel Isak's feelings as I see him channel Evens.

Julie is on the other side of the door, talking with the cameraman. I steel my breath and fling the door open, instantly being rewarded by Henriks confused look.

"What are you-" But i cut him off as I step forward and grasp the back of his head, pulling it to mine. Our lips press together and I feel him relax, one of his hands coming out to hold onto my waist gently. 

After too short a moment, I pull away, trying to steady my heart rate. "Hi. Sorry." Henrik just tightens his grip on my hips, a soft smile taking place on his mouth.

"Okay. Yes. Perfect, we're going to use that." Julies voice crashes over us. "Tarjei, great incentive. Can you guys do that again? We'll film from this Even angle and then the Isak one before we move onto the next shot. Alright?"

We both nod, our smiles matching each other. If this is how todays scene will go, Julie is going to be one happy director.

.

"OH MY GOD!" Henrik pulls away from me as soon as my tongue sweeps over his. "You're finally kissing me?! Was that tongue?"

"CUT! The hell, Henrik! Focus please." Julie snips.

.

Henrik shoves me against the wall, and it hurt, hurt in a way I know my lower back will be bruised...but also hurt in the way that my dick got even more hard at the aggression.  
We're almost tearing into each other. Keeping contact with our bodies at all times. Never breaking. Never stopping. Letting the other take and take. Him, moving to take his clothes off first before apparently deciding not to and roughly shoving my blue button up down my arms. I help him out with knocking the snapback off and removing my white shirt in two movements. 

.

I caught myself flowing between acting as Isak and acting as me. Isak; with the desperation and the desire to touch Even. To give into his deepest wants. To do what finally feels right.  
Myself; with just how being in physical proximity with Henrik affects me. How much I crave his mouth the moment it leaves mine. How I yearn for his hands to brand my skin, ache for him to leave marks, bruises, scratches; anything for me to see later and to remember what caused them.

Julie only had to stop us twice, citing 'we looked too comfortable with each other. Make it look more like we were touching for the first time.' But other than that..she let us go. Trusting us to take the reigns and give her what she needed.  
It was liberating in a way, having that control. Control over how this intimacy between Isak and Even plays out.  
Henrik and I only spoke a few words together, really. We just....we just went for it. Acted on what felt right and what we thought was looking good.  
We just allowed ourselves to be caught up in it. Letting passion absolutely rule us.

And if the beam on Julie's face as she said that final 'cut' is anything to go by....I'm thinking we did a pretty damn good job.

\---

"Ugh, no. None of those would work for them." Henrik groans, eyes glued to his phone, thumb scrolling slowly. 

I swallow the sip of beer in my mouth and let out a hurt sound. "Hey. You're the one who asked me for suggestions, jerk."

Henrik flips me off and continues his scrolling."I just want to find the perfect song you know? Something cheesy but also romantic and memorable? Isak and Even deserve that." He reaches out and grabs his cup of wine, sipping it. 

"Just pick a Celine Dion song or something then." I say, watching his neck as he swallows.

"Celine Dion?" Henrik looks up and raises his eyebrows at me. "This is probably why Julie asked me to pick the song they dance to in the kitchen, and not you." He winks at me.

"Whatever. I don't fucking care. Can we go?" I glance up at the clock. 

Henrik chuckles and finally puts his phone back in his pocket before reaching out to finish his glass. As soon as he gulps the last drop, he leans over and kisses me quickly, tasting of berry wine. "Alright, Lets go." 

\---

Its over and hour and two beers in before I realise; I don't really know many people at this party. Most of them going to different schools and most about the age of 3rd years and older. Not that its a problem; I mean I'm with Henrik and his friends who i'm acquainted with. But the thought intrigues me. The fact that people here don't know me outside of seeing me in Skam(if they watch the show of course) is nice. People have double glanced at me, at Henrik and I, and either not caring enough or being decent in leaving us alone to enjoy ourselves.  
I almost feel bolder..and I'm a fairly confident person, but this gives me a boost in a way. Its like how my life was before Skam, the incognito, just another face in the crowd.  
Once this all processed through my alcohol lined mind, I felt a thrill shoot through me.

Henrik must have noticed my silence in the conversation with the group and he turns more towards me, leaning down a bit to speak in my ear. "You alright?"

WIthout hesitation, I reach up and brush a strand of hair off his forehead before dropping my hand. "I'm fantastic." I lean a bit closer to him and tilt my head a bit, biting my lip. We've been with Henriks friends all night, and I didn't know if they knew about us yet, so I had been restraining myself from touching him. But as his eyes zero in on my lips, I feel my resolve crumbling.

"Yooooo Henke!!" We both jerk up and see Henrik's friend Alex half-stumble towards us. "I didn't know you'd be here." He throws himself into Henriks chest.

"Hey Alex." Henrik smiles, his hand patting Alexs shoulders. "Great to see you, man." He maneuvers Alex body off of his own and holds onto his shoulders. "You good?"

Alex lets out an exasperated huff. "Yeah dude! I'm fineeee." He wiggles his shoulder, causing Henrik to let go with a laugh. "I couldnt believe that I saw youuu here. You nevvvver come to parties anymore."

"Yeah well Sondre begged me to come." Then he places a hand on my forearm. "And we needed a night out to relax."

I watch as Alex finally notices me and his eyes bulge. I internally brace myself.

"OH! OH shit! ISak! Or...uhgh..fuck...whatssss his name-" Alex stutters. 

"Tarjei" I finish for him, flashing him a smile. "How are you man?"

Alex grings. "Good yeah good! Hey!" He looks between us. "Looking good onscreen though boyss!" He tries to wink at us, forcing me to finish my drink before I bust into laugher.

"Thanks Alex, but hey. We just want to chill tonight." Henrik runs a hand through his perfect locks. "So lets maybe just not bring it up tonight. Okay?" He softens his words with a smile.

"He's right though." A new voice chips in and we turn to see another one of Henriks friends, Vincent, looking at us with a smirk. "You two do look good, definitley pulling it off on the show."

It was like deja vu. I took a step back and watched history almost repeat itself. Saw how one by one, Henrik's friends seemed to be getting onboard with the same idea. Watched how Henrik nervously fidgeted with their words. His hands destroying his hair in a way that was practically making me jealous. Heard as he shot down every suggestion, using the same excuses repeatedly. Saw how his eyes would flick to mine, as if accessing my take on whats happening, as if making sure that I'm not okay with it.

That first time, we ran on pure adrenaline. That type of situation had never happened to either of us. It was something new, something to experience; so yeah, I was okay with it.

This time though..fuck. This time I wanted nothing more than to bring his lips to mine, force them open and hear his breathy moans as I stroke inside his mouth. I wanted to press him fully against me. I wanted to feel the outline of his body under my fingertips.  
So yeah, I'm still okay with it.

I'm about to open my mouth and tell him so when the enevitable happens.

"Make out!"

"Make out!"

"Make out!"

I glance around to see that people have taken notice and are now forming a slight ring around us. Deja fuking vu.

Henrik faces me, his eyes wide with growing panic. "T, do you wanna just leave? I'm sorry. I didnt think this would happen here-"

I cut him off, deciding to use the exact words as before, hoping everything I want to say lies within it. "I've never wanted to kiss you so fucking bad than right now."

Henriks face erupts into the biggest grin i've seen all night. "Yeah?" His body instantly radiates confidence, reaching out and pulling me to him, his blue eyes burning through me. "Then fucking do it."

With a low growl I place both my hands behind his neck and connect our mouths.  
And just like that, we're there. Back to forgetting that others are in the room; to hearing nothing but the breaths coming out of us in desperation; to feeling the silkiness of his hair between my fingers as I tangle them in it. Its just Henrik and I.  
At that sensation, Henrik lets out a quiet moan, allowing me to force my tongue to slide against his, our mouths moving in sync, knowing what the other likes. I feel his hands grip my waist, fingers digging into my skin through my clothes. He pulls me flush against him, our heads tilting to gain better access of each others lips. My hands tug on his hair, slightly and his teeth graze my tongue. I feel his growing erection against me and it brings me out of my haze.

Making out at a party is fine. But I draw the line at dry humping on the dance floor. And if we continue at the pace we're at, thats whats going to happen.

Henrik must have sensed my mood change as he releases his hands on my hips. I slow down our mouths until he gives me once last peck before pulling away.  
All of the sound hits my ears at once. The music. The cheering. Laughing. People shouting. I couldn't focus on their words. Not with Henrik looking as wrecked as I feel inside.

A body shoves against Henrik, breaking the spell. "DUDDEEESS!! THat was SOO much better than before at that party!" Alex yells, throwing an arm around Henrik and shaking him. "THe fuck dude! HOW do you have so much chemistry with people?"

Henrik lets out a laugh. "Nah." His eyes are bright; filled with fondness and lust and happiness and love..and they hold mine, making my lips part at the intensity.

"Only with one."


End file.
